Vaccinations, agree to disagree?

[starrynight14]

Disclaimer: I don't even know if there are any "antivaxxers" on this board, but I just want to clarify that I don't mean to offend anyone. 

I just was curious how/if you all deal with your LO's interactions with children who are not vaccinated. (playgroups/daycare/school). Does it bother you? Why or why not? At what age is it "less riskier" for our kids to interact with others who haven't been vaccinated. Gosh, I hope this come across as ignorant. I've been trying to do some research and it leaves me even more confused. There is so much info on both sides of the fence!

[aaemommy]

We have not come across this, surprisingly. But A goes to a small in-home daycare and we don't do organized playgroups. At this point, it wouldn't bother me unless the child was showing symptoms of being sick. Which then I wouldn't want them around A whether they were vaccinated or not. But A has had all of his vaccinations and doesn't have anything comprising his immune system.
When DS2 comes, I will feel differently until he gets all his vaccinations as well. I wouldn't want either boy around an unvaccinated child.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that as long as there's nothing comprising their immune system, I'm okay with everyday interactions once my kids have all their vaccines.

[vk]

I don't think you sound ignorant, I think those are valid questions.

But I will do my best to keep my kids safe, and that means keeping them away from unvacc kids until all of our vaccinations are up to date.

Thankfully we haven't come across any situations where I had to remove ourselves from the situation, but I have made sure to ask if kids are vaccinated before sending DS into the wild.

[vk]

to add to your title... No, not agree to disagree. Basically it is stay the F away.

You are putting MY child at risk by not vaccinating yours.

[Deleted]

The only place I can think where there might possibly be anti vaxers would be when we go to MOPS or church. However, at the childcare in these places DS is with his own age group, so I know he is up to date for anything age appropriate.

[mimsy]

I only know of one kid who might not be vaxxed, he's 4 or 5 now.
Honestly, S is a bigger risk to him than he is to her. He was a Tet baby (tetralogy of fallot- a serious heart defect) and also had a lobe of his lung removed at birth just to start with his health. He's done several rounds of chemo for something else (non cancer related).
So, we keep away from him for his safety.

[ice61313]

aaemommy said it best. Vaccines aren't 100% either so if I would know in advance that somebody doesn't feel good (especially someone who isn't vaxxed), I will keep my vaccinated kid away regardless.

[vk]

Mar 21, 2016 6:03:34 GMT -5 @becominggold said:

The only place I can think where there might possibly be anti vaxers would be when we go to MOPS or church. However, at the childcare in these places DS is with his own age group, so I know he is up to date for anything age appropriate.

I would be worried more so about your DS bringing germs home from kids and spreading them to your DD. that scares me the most. 

[cdseno]

Mar 21, 2016 6:03:34 GMT -5 @becominggold said:

The only place I can think where there might possibly be anti vaxers would be when we go to MOPS or church. However, at the childcare in these places DS is with his own age group, so I know he is up to date for anything age appropriate.

Are you worried about what he could bring home and pass on to your DD though? I would think you would need to more careful about who he's around for her sake.

[cdseno]

I can't think of a single person I know, that we regularly spend time with, who doesn't vaccinate their kids. If we did, we wouldn't spend time with them. Vaccines aren't a guarantee that they'll never catch something, so I wouldn't put my kids in the situation to risk that they do. Max just had Influenza B, despite getting the flu shot, and while it wasn't a bad case, it still sucked.

[afmama22]

Unfortunately, I know several people who considered not vaccinating their children, one of whom was a close friend. I had to tell her that I would not allow A around her children until she is fully vaccinated, unless chooses to vaccinate them. I also flooded her email with pro-vax articles. She has an older child with sensory processing issues and was convinced vaccinations caused it. *insert eye roll* In the end, she chose to vaccinate on an alternate schedule.

[swim]

I can't think of anyone I know who is anti Vax. But if I did I don't think we would be around them. DD is up to date on her vaccines but DS is not. Do not want her to bring anything home to him.

[Deleted]

vk cdseno‌ Good point....I should have said he hasn't been those places since she was born. He is still going to daycare though, but we are super careful about changing clothes and washing as soon as he comes home.

[puffandstuff]

I don't know anyone who isn't vaccinated. I don't think there is a way to know any every situation that the kids my kids may come in contact with (mall, restaurant, playground) kids who aren't vaccinated.

[starrynight14]

Would you guys consider "up to date" on immunizations when LO is current on all vaccinations they can receive at this point, or when they've completed all rounds of vaccinations at all together?


I guess in my specific case, I just found out a family, who my kids have been playing with and seeing regularly so not vaccinate their kids. LO is current on his, but obviously still will be needing more over months/years. So this is where I'm still confused if it's risky to have LO around these kids.

[aaemommy]

Mar 21, 2016 8:50:32 GMT -5 starrynight14 said:

Would you guys consider "up to date" on immunizations when LO is current on all vaccinations they can receive at this point, or when they've completed all rounds of vaccinations at all together?


I guess in my specific case, I just found out a family, who my kids have been playing with and seeing regularly so not vaccinate their kids. LO is current on his, but obviously still will be needing more over months/years. So this is where I'm still confused if it's risky to have LO around these kids.

I would consider them to be up to date vaccinated once they've completed the 18 months worth of vaccines. Those first vaccines hit almost everything and although there are others as they get older, I think many of them are boosters or other versions of vaccines they get in that initial window.

[starrynight14]

Also, I should add that I do understand that I know my kids will obviously come in contact with others who aren't vaccinated because it's inevitable. Especially now that DS1 is in elementary school. I know it's a "thing" for some antivaxxers to still let their kids go to school.

[hoosiermama76]

I'm sure I run into kids without vaccines every day: Target, grocery, the park, etc. I would not purposely put my kid in close proximity to them. We keep to ourselves and practice good hygiene. Of my friends that we have play dates with, all are vaccinated.

[Courtniko]

I don't know anyone that does not have their kids up to date with vaccines. At daycare all the kids have to be up to date. I am sure there are people out and about at the store or wherever.
I would not want DD around anyone showing signs of illness, especially with DS coming along soon.

[weeklyplanner]

Mar 21, 2016 8:54:50 GMT -5 RedBean84 said:

We ran into a possible issue with it over Thanksgiving. H has a cousin (not close) who married a woman with two children who are unvaccinated. One child is older than DD, the other is the same age. I'm uncomfortable knowingly bringing DD around these children, mostly because they have already contracted a couple of the diseases the vaccines protect against.

Anyway, I was all anxious about having to tell MIL that we wouldn't be attending their Thanksgiving. Luckily, MIL was completely on my side and it ended up being a non-issue. I have no idea how I will handle it in future situations.

ETA: obviously I can't keep her from every non-vaccinated individual, and I won't try, but I will try to protect her from people I do know about. Maybe my feelings will change as She gets older, but that's my decision for now.

I can't imagine my kids getting preventable illnesses and STILL choosing not to vaccinate. I'm glad MIL was on your side!

[mrsnorris]

This hasn't really come up for us and I worry less now about random contact in Target, etc, since LO has her full battery of shots up to 18 months. But I'll also say that no, if it was someone in my life, I would not agree to disagree. I'm not interested in having my children spend time with people who will endanger others simply because of their own willful ignorance or selfishness. I also don't want my kids around for whatever other idiotic lapses in judgement they'd have.

[starrynight14]

Mar 21, 2016 8:54:50 GMT -5 RedBean84 said:

We ran into a possible issue with it over Thanksgiving. H has a cousin (not close) who married a woman with two children who are unvaccinated. One child is older than DD, the other is the same age. I'm uncomfortable knowingly bringing DD around these children, mostly because they have already contracted a couple of the diseases the vaccines protect against.

Anyway, I was all anxious about having to tell MIL that we wouldn't be attending their Thanksgiving. Luckily, MIL was completely on my side and it ended up being a non-issue. I have no idea how I will handle it in future situations.

ETA: obviously I can't keep her from every non-vaccinated individual, and I won't try, but I will try to protect her from people I do know about. Maybe my feelings will change as She gets older, but that's my decision for now.

What ended up happening with the Thanksgiving plans?

[khopec]

This was a topic I discussed seriously with my pediatrician. As most of you know I am a step grandma, my stepson has chosen not to vaccinate my grandson. Because of this DS and him have never met. They moved to Hawaii when DS was 3 months old and at that time there was no way in hell I would let an unvaccinated child around mine. Basically my Pediatrician told me with each booster DS was more and more protected. She recommended that we keep him away until at least 6 months of age and had his first 3 Tdap boosters. Ideally in a perfect world until he was fully vaccinated but if not remember good hygiene and keep distance when sick.

Honestly I am glad they moved away so I haven't had to make the decision or fight the fight. If they were to come and visit or vice versa ideally DS will be 2 and fully vaccinated. And unfortunately I will still worry and feel very uneasy about them interacting.

[starrynight14]

Mar 21, 2016 12:20:57 GMT -5 khopec said:

This was a topic I discussed seriously with my pediatrician. As most of you know I am a step grandma, my stepson has chosen not to vaccinate my grandson. Because of this DS and him have never met. They moved to Hawaii when DS was 3 months old and at that time there was no way in hell I would let an unvaccinated child around mine. Basically my Pediatrician told me with each booster DS was more and more protected. She recommended that we keep him away until at least 6 months of age and had his first 3 Tdap boosters. Ideally in a perfect world until he was fully vaccinated but if not remember good hygiene and keep distance when sick.

Honestly I am glad they moved away so I haven't had to make the decision or fight the fight. If they were to come and visit or vice versa ideally DS will be 2 and fully vaccinated. And unfortunately I will still worry and feel very uneasy about them interacting.

That's a good idea to get the opinion of your pediatrician. I may consider doing that.  My kids have been around these kids for a while now, and I'm just finding out their mother doesn't vaccinate her kids... in addition to making homemade infant formula for her baby. I'm kind of freaked out by it. The thing is, it's my BIL's new girlfriend. They've become very serious and he wants us apart  of his new life. I guess I have prepare myself  for some really awkward and uncomfortable conversations about my hesitations of my kids playing with them and them coming over. Ugh, what a nightmare!

[cdseno]

Mar 21, 2016 16:48:56 GMT -5 starrynight14 said:

Mar 21, 2016 12:20:57 GMT -5 khopec said:

This was a topic I discussed seriously with my pediatrician. As most of you know I am a step grandma, my stepson has chosen not to vaccinate my grandson. Because of this DS and him have never met. They moved to Hawaii when DS was 3 months old and at that time there was no way in hell I would let an unvaccinated child around mine. Basically my Pediatrician told me with each booster DS was more and more protected. She recommended that we keep him away until at least 6 months of age and had his first 3 Tdap boosters. Ideally in a perfect world until he was fully vaccinated but if not remember good hygiene and keep distance when sick.

Honestly I am glad they moved away so I haven't had to make the decision or fight the fight. If they were to come and visit or vice versa ideally DS will be 2 and fully vaccinated. And unfortunately I will still worry and feel very uneasy about them interacting.

That's a good idea to get the opinion of your pediatrician. I may consider doing that.  My kids have been around these kids for a while now, and I'm just finding out their mother doesn't vaccinate her kids... in addition to making homemade infant formula for her baby. I'm kind of freaked out by it. The thing is, it's my BIL's new girlfriend. They've become very serious and he wants us apart  of his new life. I guess I have prepare myself  for some really awkward and uncomfortable conversations about my hesitations of my kids playing with them and them coming over. Ugh, what a nightmare!

Is your friend Kristen Cavallari?!?!?!

[HazyGrey]

My good friend's 3 children aren't vaccinated. We just follow the same general disclosure when hanging out, by saying, just wanted to let you know that my kid has the sniffles, etc. I totally understand if you don't want to hang out. She lives in a nice community where the general herd is vaccinated, so I'm honestly never worried. It never really crosses my mind. She has a newborn now and i will definitely probably leave DD behind when I visit, or ask her what she's comfortable with when we do visit.

I guess I feel like you can pick up pathogens from anywhere and I don't drive myself crazy figuring out who's vaccinated or not.

BTW, my friend and I never talk about vaccines, it's one of those things where I respect her decision not to. Do I agree with it? Absolutely not, but to me, it's not my business to intrude, unless she asked me directly what I think.

[shevacc]

Mar 21, 2016 10:31:07 GMT -5 mrsnorris said:

This hasn't really come up for us and I worry less now about random contact in Target, etc, since LO has her full battery of shots up to 18 months. But I'll also say that no, if it was someone in my life, I would not agree to disagree. I'm not interested in having my children spend time with people who will endanger others simply because of their own willful ignorance or selfishness. I also don't want my kids around for whatever other idiotic lapses in judgement they'd have.

My thoughts exactly.

AKAIC if they're willing to risk my child's health due to willful stupidity they can go to hell.

[sosayweall]

I probably wouldn't keep my child away from unvaccinated children even though I don't agree with antivaxxers. I don't know anyone who doesn't vaccinate though. If there were outbreaks going on I would keep them away. It's much more likely they will catch things that we don't have vaccines for. That's more of what worries me but most friends/family will let me know if they or their kids are sick.

[gratefulgirl]

We have a few modified vaccination people at church. Until my kids are 12 mo. and have at least some of the life threatening vaccines we stay away. All the families have older kids so it is not terribly challenging. It hasn't come up directly to me - the grapevine said it or the kids caught a vaccine preventable disease (rotovirus, and apparently it was miserable). If it came up I would state my mind and then drop it.

Once DD3 is here we'll be back to avoiding a few people. It is pretty easy to do unobtrusively with a baby.

[brachysira]

I have a 3 year-old too and we go to museums, indoor play places, parks, playgroups...all of it. I am in a moms' group, and there was once a thread on their page about how to find a doctor who welcomed alternative therapies, but as I read down, what they meant was a doctor who was okay with not vaccinating. We stayed home the first winter with both kids, but this winter, it has been non-stop sickness. I think we have some kind of antibiotic resistant thing now... It is a mess. Oh, off topic. Indeed, I try to keep my kids home when sick and tell others if they're a little sick before we decide to meet. I wish I could avoid the unvaccinated kids, but I fear they are everywhere. Even our preschool teacher told us there were unvaccinated kids there...but we liked it, so fingers crossed...