caer, is your OB still tracking your hcg to 0? I got a new batch of wondfos in from amazon last night and because I like to torture myself I peed on one. Still two lines. My follow up isn't until the week of the 4th (I thought it was actually next week, so boo to that...) and we haven't been tracking hcg. ::sigh:: I just want my body back sooner rather than later.
No. They basically said just call if I don't get AF within 8 weeks. But I'm also POAS periodically to see what's happening. I had two leftover Clearblue Weeks Estimator tests. I used one a week after the D&C and it said "2-3 weeks" pregnant (what we call 4-5 weeks). Then I took the last one a week later and it said "1-2 weeks." So I feel comfortable that my HCG is dropping.
As you can see, I've gone to crazy land with this so I completely understand being frustrated and wanting to know what's going on. Do you know for sure that they're not tracing your HCG to zero?
caer, is your OB still tracking your hcg to 0? I got a new batch of wondfos in from amazon last night and because I like to torture myself I peed on one. Still two lines. My follow up isn't until the week of the 4th (I thought it was actually next week, so boo to that...) and we haven't been tracking hcg. ::sigh:: I just want my body back sooner rather than later.
No. They basically said just call if I don't get AF within 8 weeks. But I'm also POAS periodically to see what's happening. I had two leftover Clearblue Weeks Estimator tests. I used one a week after the D&C and it said "2-3 weeks" pregnant (what we call 4-5 weeks). Then I took the last one a week later and it said "1-2 weeks." So I feel comfortable that my HCG is dropping.
As you can see, I've gone to crazy land with this so I completely understand being frustrated and wanting to know what's going on. Do you know for sure that they're not tracing your HCG to zero?
Thanks for sharing. I'm not sure what my OBs plan is yet. I just know that she hasn't had me come in for any blood draws since my d&c. When we talked before the procedure she said I should expect AF within ~6weeks.
I'll probably just keep peeing on my wondfos between now and my appointment just for the sake of some information... Maybe one of these days it'll be negative. I don't think I've ever wished so hard for a bfn.
Updates/questions: IVF#2 is already a fail. ER yesterday got 11 eggs, got the call from my RE only 3 were mature and none of them fertilized.
Debbie downer (a place to vent): I can't seem to win. I feel like no matter what we do we will never get our rainbow. RE mentioned donor eggs, he thinks after 2 different protocols my eggs don't respond well to stims. He suggested either a lose dose of stims and don't do PGS or try iui. I feel so hopeless in all of this right now.
GTKY: Spring is here! What is your favorite thing about Spring? Flower blooming and warmer weather.
Post by daystardreams on Mar 23, 2016 12:18:11 GMT -5
peaseblossom55 I'm so, so sorry. I know I've read somewhere that sometimes a low dose of stims can make all the difference but I can't remember where I read it.
I hate this for you so bad right now. Again, I'm so sorry.
caer , I’m sorry about all the pregnants. I’m the same way right now. Another friend just texted me to tell me she’s pregnant today. Which makes about 1 million people in the last few months.
@samrs22 , where in the Midwest are you vacationing?? It’s been pretty nice weather here lately!
Post by akraus2015 on Mar 23, 2016 12:42:22 GMT -5
The adoption interview went really well yesterday. There were a few surprises that we weren't expecting (like we hadn't talked about children with special needs and to what extent we would be comfortable with), but we talked quite a bit afterwards and seem pretty satisfied with this agency.
We are still getting used to the idea of an open adoption where the birth mother has the option of visits each year, but I know that there is so much research that says open adoptions are better for the child, and less risky, etc.
Now we go before a review committee for final approval, which we should know within a week or so, and then we have the option to start building our profile. I think we're going to wait to build the profile (it requires a large down payment) until we know that we've exhausted all our options with the Clomid, so maybe May or so.
Post by notagoddess on Mar 23, 2016 14:28:00 GMT -5
I'm also having a difficult time. Seems that my hormonal issue is "biological clock related" and the RE suggests jumping right to Clomid + IUI (after doing an HSG). My husband is dead set against it and would rather not have a kid than go through fertility treatment. I am heartbroken. I can't believe I'm just going to sit here and watch my remaining fertility run out. I've been crying nonstop since Monday.
Post by wannabmama on Mar 23, 2016 14:38:29 GMT -5
notagoddess I'm so sorry, that is so frustrating. I get the hesitation to do more invasive things but it sucks that it is a one sided decision. Is there any chance he will open up to other options? I am assuming you would be willing to pursue them? I'm so sorry. Everything is unfair.
TTC since July 2014. CP March 2015. IVF #1 March 2016, 5R, 3M, 2F with ICSI. Transferred 2 on day 3. CP. Surprise BFP and then CP August 2016 (prep cycle for IVF). IVF #2: zero eggs retrieved IVF #3: 6R, 5M, 5F, 3 (2 8A and 1 11A) transferred, one "B" graded embryo frozen on day 5. BFP (at home 7dp3dt, confirmed 14dp3dt with 1552 beta) and U/S at 5w5d, 2 sacs and 2 yolks!
I'm also having a difficult time. Seems that my hormonal issue is "biological clock related" and the RE suggests jumping right to Clomid + IUI (after doing an HSG). My husband is dead set against it and would rather not have a kid than go through fertility treatment. I am heartbroken. I can't believe I'm just going to sit here and watch my remaining fertility run out. I've been crying nonstop since Monday.
Post by notagoddess on Mar 23, 2016 14:45:42 GMT -5
wannabmama, peaseblossom55, I honestly have no idea and none of what he's saying makes sense to me. This is the worst thing for our marriage.. I am so upset with his lack of support in this whole process. It's hard to see beyond the pain and anger right now.
Oh notagoddess, I'm so so sorry. How utterly frustrating. Is there a specific reason your H objects to more invasive options? Is he scared or afraid of something? I'm so sorry that you're having to cope with his stance on treatments in addition to the TTC/TTCAL/RE cluster fuck.
Oh notagoddess, I'm so so sorry. How utterly frustrating. Is there a specific reason your H objects to more invasive options? Is he scared or afraid of something? I'm so sorry that you're having to cope with his stance on treatments in addition to the TTC/TTCAL/RE cluster fuck.
He thinks by going through fertility treatments we will end up with a messed up kid.... Like it's forcing nature or tempting fate or whatever.
ETA: I don't know if that's really his main reason. He also hates doctors and a lot of modern medicine, and had financial concerns.
Oh notagoddess , I'm so so sorry. How utterly frustrating. Is there a specific reason your H objects to more invasive options? Is he scared or afraid of something? I'm so sorry that you're having to cope with his stance on treatments in addition to the TTC/TTCAL/RE cluster fuck.
He thinks by going through fertility treatments we will end up with a messed up kid.... Like it's forcing nature or tempting fate or whatever.
Sounds like an irrational version of "I just don't wanna".
I apologize for not knowing this, but has he done a SA? Maybe this fear/stubbornness comes from a refusal to want to provide his side of the deal in a cup? Maybe it's a subconscious fear of finding out the issue is MFI? Just throwing things out there. I'm so sorry that none of this is probably helpful at this point.
Oh notagoddess , I'm so so sorry. How utterly frustrating. Is there a specific reason your H objects to more invasive options? Is he scared or afraid of something? I'm so sorry that you're having to cope with his stance on treatments in addition to the TTC/TTCAL/RE cluster fuck.
He thinks by going through fertility treatments we will end up with a messed up kid.... Like it's forcing nature or tempting fate or whatever.
ETA: I don't know if that's really his main reason. He also hates doctors and a lot of modern medicine, and had financial concerns.
I'm so sorry that you are going thru this. Is it possible to give some time and space and revisit the discussion with him? Men sometimes react negatively when they feel powerless. It sucks that you have to convince him to try but perhaps researching how to finance the process and some success stories?
He thinks by going through fertility treatments we will end up with a messed up kid.... Like it's forcing nature or tempting fate or whatever.
Sounds like an irrational version of "I just don't wanna".
I apologize for not knowing this, but has he done a SA? Maybe this fear/stubbornness comes from a refusal to want to provide his side of the deal in a cup? Maybe it's a subconscious fear of finding out the issue is MFI? Just throwing things out there. I'm so sorry that none of this is probably helpful at this point.
I know. It really doesn't make sense and I think he's throwing out random shit to hide overall fear. His SA came back normal so it's not that.
I am so jealous of women who have the full support of their spouses dealing with loss/IF. MH is usually great but this issue is tearing us apart.
He thinks by going through fertility treatments we will end up with a messed up kid.... Like it's forcing nature or tempting fate or whatever.
ETA: I don't know if that's really his main reason. He also hates doctors and a lot of modern medicine, and had financial concerns.
I'm so sorry that you are going thru this. Is it possible to give some time and space and revisit the discussion with him? Men sometimes react negatively when they feel powerless. It sucks that you have to convince him to try but perhaps researching how to finance the process and some success stories?
I hope he does come around. He was coming around to Clomid but after the appointment he shut down. Maybe it is the powerlessness?
Either way the effect on our marriage is pretty awful.
wannabmama, peaseblossom55, I honestly have no idea and none of what he's saying makes sense to me. This is the worst thing for our marriage.. I am so upset with his lack of support in this whole process. It's hard to see beyond the pain and anger right now.
I'm so sorry. Does he prefer adoption or some other idea? Is he ok with not have children? I'm a very list goals oriented person and perhaps you guys have already done this can you ask him on paper to map out his reasoning and thought process? You don't have to answer me of course I understand. I hope I am not prying either.
Post by notagoddess on Mar 23, 2016 15:10:34 GMT -5
Thanks for the support, ladies. I can still see things working out for us with TTC, naturally or through the RE's help. And we will somehow figure things out between us. But my emotions around the process are extremely intense at the moment. I love that I have you and this place
wannabmama, peaseblossom55, I honestly have no idea and none of what he's saying makes sense to me. This is the worst thing for our marriage.. I am so upset with his lack of support in this whole process. It's hard to see beyond the pain and anger right now.
I'm so sorry. Does he prefer adoption or some other idea? Is he ok with not have children? I'm a very list goals oriented person and perhaps you guys have already done this can you ask him on paper to map out his reasoning and thought process? You don't have to answer me of course I understand. I hope I am not prying either.
His thought process right now is not at all rational so I doubt he would be able to map it out. He's been open to adoption in the past, but neither of us have talked about it recently. I feel like we will get to that if and when we completely give up on TTC. He has always wanted kids but recently has been saying things along the lines of, if it's not meant to happen...
I have no advice notagoddess but I'm so sorry your H is struggling and not more supportive. I really hope he comes around. In my mind, fertility treatments are just like any other medical advancement. You wouldn't say "well I'm not taking my blood pressure medicine because if I'm meant to have a heart attack, I'm meant to have one." But I know it's a sensitive topic for many people. Sending (((hugs))).
I'm so sorry. Does he prefer adoption or some other idea? Is he ok with not have children? I'm a very list goals oriented person and perhaps you guys have already done this can you ask him on paper to map out his reasoning and thought process? You don't have to answer me of course I understand. I hope I am not prying either.
His thought process right now is not at all rational so I doubt he would be able to map it out. He's been open to adoption in the past, but neither of us have talked about it recently. I feel like we will get to that if and when we completely give up on TTC. He has always wanted kids but recently has been saying things along the lines of, if it's not meant to happen...
I'm so sorry. Perhaps he just needs time to really think it all through and to let it sink in. I really hope you guys can work on a solution that you both feel happy with.
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