NWMR: GoFundMe vent

[CoverGirl82]

Does anyone else feel like with the advent of GoFundMe and other fundraising sites that there are more people out there with ridiculous requests for money?  Don't get me wrong, I am all about charitable giving.  DH and I give to our church, to local organizations that help others, and we sponsor a child in Africa.  But those organizations are audited and have to follow specific rules as to how donations are spent. 

I guess what set me off is seeing that my cousin's girlfriend set up a GoFundMe page (that she created a post about on FB) so she can take her son to Disney World.  (By the way, he's perfectly healthy - I am okay with special trips for kids that are terminally ill, but again, there are legitimate organizations for those trips.)  I'm sorry, but fun trips should be saved for (or if you can't afford it, you don't go), and you shouldn't ask for handouts like that on FB. 

Anyways, vent over.

What is the most ridiculous GoFundMe (or similar) request you've ever seen?

[wineistheanswer]

A girl I know started one for her wedding gown. It was more than her parents were willing to pay, so she started a GoFundMe for it. She was in her 30's.

[welly01]

Wow, that's ridiculous.

[mustardseed2007]

Wow. What is wrong with people?!

[jlaok]

Wow. Both the wedding dress and Disney trip are ridiculous.

I don't usually have a problem with the GoFundMe fundraisers. I do sometimes feel sorry for those who don't catch any sort of social media buzz and therefore don't collect the exorbitant amount of money as those who do. I guess that's the nature of social media though.

[supertrooper1]

I agree that people have no shame asking for money and it's gotten out of hand with GoFundMe. I was on there yesterday because of a local high school fundraiser. I decided to browse some of the other posts. One was for a lady who wanted attorney fees so she could try to get custody of her kids back. That sounds great, but she included how messed up she was, and her H had won full custody in their divorce. He then had the kids taken away by CPS. Sorry, I'm not going to fund a women to get her kids back just so she can mess them up some more. Another was for a local bakery that was failing and they were asking for $7,000 to pay their mortgage and power bills. That messes with capitalism IMO and a failing business should go under.

[ericalee27]

Just no to the wedding dress and disney...seriously.

[2chatter]

I honestly cannot think of many legit gofundme requests that I have seen. Most of them disgust me on some level (like medical bill assistance for entirely preventable things like not wearing a helmet on an ATV). I think the biggest turnoff is the sheer entitlement the requests just drip with all the way around.

[aylafsu1881]

I agree. I hate most of the GoFundMe's that get sent my way. It is not my responsibility to pay for you to take a trip, go on your honeymoon, or help you go to college.

The ones that I do support are ones set up for medical expenses. I had a couple of friends who had problems with surgeries or who had extreme diagnosis. They set up accounts to raise funds to pay for a trip to Atlanta to see specialists or help cover the cost of some procedures. Those I agree with and supported.

[alioop1028]

Feb 5, 2015 12:43:20 GMT -5 supertrooper1 said:

I agree that people have no shame asking for money and it's gotten out of hand with GoFundMe. I was on there yesterday because of a local high school fundraiser. I decided to browse some of the other posts. One was for a lady who wanted attorney fees so she could try to get custody of her kids back. That sounds great, but she included how messed up she was, and her H had won full custody in their divorce. He then had the kids taken away by CPS. Sorry, I'm not going to fund a women to get her kids back just so she can mess them up some more. Another was for a local bakery that was failing and they were asking for $7,000 to pay their mortgage and power bills. That messes with capitalism IMO and a failing business should go under.

OMG. What is wrong with people.

[clarkebar1013]

I've donated to a few Gofundme requests that seemed legit. One was for a family that lost two of their children bc a tree landed on their car while they were at a stop sign. I don't even remember what the money was going to be used for (funeral expenses, a new car etc) but it really really made my heart hurt. I've seen one asking for money to get a car fixed lol.

[kendraj426]

I was actually ranting about this at work last week. I think it's ridiculous the stuff that most people on the site are trying to raise money for. And people donate money! You don't know what they are ACTUALLY going to use this money for. They could give you a sob story, and then go use the money to go to Disneyland or buy a new car. If people want to donate money to charity, why not give to a charity that has a history of actually doing good for communities?

Also, on a similar note, this James Robertson fund is bugging me too. I'm sure this will be an unpopular opinion, but this guy has received over $300,000 to help him get a car so he doesn't have to walk 21 miles to work. And Honda has offered to donate a car. That's cool and all, but what about the rest of the working poor in America that need help? Where are their cars and money from random strangers? If people want to help, why not donate to your local food pantry, soup kitchen, etc instead of the latest internet media blast?

[Divefrog]

I have a friend who's verternan brother was raising money to pay for a service dog to help with his severe PTSD. I can get behind those kind of requests. It seemes ridiculous that the VA wouldn't cover that kind of need thoguh.

It bothers me that people are faced with fundraising for medical expenses, and expenses related to dealing with medical conditions, and loved ones deaths due to accidents and medical conditions. We should have a system that doesn't allow medical care to financially criple families.

However, from a personal acountability and responsibility perspective. The situations where you can clearly see if they would have had disability insurance and/or the proper life insurance they wouldn't need to be fundraising...yeah those really bug me too.

[RiseAndWine]

What I can't figure out is who is donating to that ridiculousness. I like the ones that are like indy film producer asking for funding to greenlight his project. But wedding gowns? Nothankyou. I dont think its a new thing, though. Social media has just made us more aware and had made it easier for people to ask.
But it always amazes me the people who actually contribute to these people.

[queenbabee]

That's annoying, but I wouldn't hate for asking lol. The dumbass who donates...yes.

[queenbabee]

Feb 5, 2015 13:43:51 GMT -5 RiseAndWine said:

What I can't figure out is who is donating to that ridiculousness. I like the ones that are like indy film producer asking for funding to greenlight his project. But wedding gowns? Nothankyou. I dont think its a new thing, though. Social media has just made us more aware and had made it easier for people to ask.
But it always amazes me the people who actually contribute to these people.

Exactly!! And jinx

[CurlieWhirlie]

Is this a millenial problem, this lack of shame asking for money/things? Like, if you're getting married it's totally ok to share your registry and people will buy you stuff, but it's becoming normal to share a wishlist of items for *any occasion* now, like going to college or starting a new job. I'm sorry, but it's not ok with me that you, my peer and not my family member, want me to help pay for your new office wardrobe.

[fancynewbeesly]

*raises hand* We actually have a gofundme account. We didn't start it, but my cousin offered to start it for Reese. She started it because although luckily health insurance covered the majority of the hospital bills for Reese---we had a HUGE loss of income for being in the hospital so much with her. I was out of work for 12 weeks. Then the summer was off (i am a teacher, and I put money aside for the summer to have--but being off and not paid for 12 weeks, there wasn't that money available.) Then i was off for 3 weeks when she was rehospitalized again.

But even with ALL that, we never would have started it, or asked for it--but my cousin really wanted to do it and it seriously has helped.

So they aren't all jokes.

[Deleted]

Maybe many are superfluous, but my thought is just don't donate to it. My cousin started one for a reason I didn't agree with, and he sent out a message to everyone with a sarcastic "thanks for not donating." That made me v angry.

[mommyatty]

I've never seen any of these requests. Apparently I live under a rock, lol. DH had three much younger second cousins who were really into softball. They were RELENTLESS in their fundraising for trips, equipment, overseas opportunities to play with other teams, etc. If they had this option, oh Sweet Jesus. It would have been so much worse. All I could think as a poor college student/law school student/young government lawyer with student loans was a line from an Ogden Nash poem: "What in the hell are your parents for?" (And you can bet your asses that when my kids have anything to sell, those now-adults will be the absolute top of our list of people to harass about donating.)

[somebabiesmom]

I see it as an obvious evolution for convenience (kind of like the way drive thrus accept credit cards now) which can be abused. The abusers seem to suffer from the delusion of entitlement, have somehow confused themselves for your typical charity-target-population (i.e., those actually in need), and aren't clear on grandma's love vs. the public's benevolence.

I'm not one to pop anyone's bubble, though. If someone wants to be grandma to someone's penis enlargement, I say spread the love - pay it forward - may the odds be ever in your favor - help me help you, etc., etc.

[somebabiesmom]

Feb 5, 2015 21:20:38 GMT -5 @babybeanerx said:

Maybe many are superfluous, but my thought is just don't donate to it. My cousin started one for a reason I didn't agree with, and he sent out a message to everyone with a sarcastic "thanks for not donating." That made me v angry.

In retaliation, I would have started one to get this guy some therapy and then solicited him.

[rubberchicken]

Maybe I'm paranoid delusional or something, but I never trust these.  There have been hoaxes - people aren't above using a sick kid's picture to steal money from others.  And there was that one gofundme or indiegogo where the uncle had opened it to fundraise for his nephew's cancer treatment or something, but then he never gave the money to his brother and nephew.

[McBenny]

I can't hate on the gofundme people because no one is made to donate and if strangers want to donate to something crazy then so be it.

[olenka]

A friend of mine recently mentioned a trip to a European country she's planning to take next year. Someone commented "You should do a kickstarter for this," completely seriously. She isn't the type to do something like that, but just the fact that people think it's OK to ask others to fund a vacation? Ugh!! Yeah, no one is forcing people to donate, but the entitlement mindset is what bugs me.

[MaiTaiBeth]

I think that takes away from the people that really need it. My friends started one when PF was in the NICU, we had no idea. We moved to Boston for 5 months and it paid for a month and a half for us. The first time I ever saw something like asking for money for something not really necessary was savekaryn it was actually a pretty funny blog and became a book. I think that was over 10yrs ago.

[smalltownmoon]

Someone on my BMB had a FB friend asking people to donate to their virtual baby shower via gofundme because no one had offered to throw them one and they can't afford the "the big stuff." Oy.

[beevol]

Feb 5, 2015 13:24:38 GMT -5 Divefrog said:

I have a friend who's verternan brother was raising money to pay for a service dog to help with his severe PTSD. I can get behind those kind of requests. It seemes ridiculous that the VA wouldn't cover that kind of need thoguh.

It bothers me that people are faced with fundraising for medical expenses, and expenses related to dealing with medical conditions, and loved ones deaths due to accidents and medical conditions. We should have a system that doesn't allow medical care to financially criple families.

This. I hate that I live in a world where people need to beg in order to afford basic medical care.

I've only donated to/passed along a request for gofundme once and it was for a friend of a friend whose infant daughter died of SIDS and she didn't have the money for a funeral. I know some people carry life insurance on their kids, but not single moms who work minimum wage jobs (heck, I'm pretty well off and don't carry life insurance on my kids - kinehara).

I am a big believer in creating a society with a strong enough safety net/basic minimum that we can reasonably expect personal accountability. The idea that someone would beg money from their friends for a vacation bothers me, the fact that so many Americans are in such dismal poverty bothers me, and the fact that some of those folks become memes and are sort of exploited while earning ungodly amounts of money so that we all feel better about our crappy society also bothers me.

[mischiefmama]

One for a bachelor party that included references to getting strippers, getting drunk, and the like.

[laketide]

I saw one recently asking to help them with rent.... I'm hoping there were circumstances I didn't realize to fhat situation but I can't imagine asking all my Facebook friends to help me with my house payment. And their goal was to have ebough donated for living expenses for 6-8 months I think.