An open letter...

[melohdy]

Dear ____,

__________________________

From, sincerely, love,

________

[melohdy]

Dearest Lilly,

Syrup is not face moisturizer. Nor is it hair gel. Please cease and desist.

Sincerely,

Mother of perpetually sticky child

[ordinaryme]

Dear Evelyn,
Please, please stop taking your socks and shoes off in the car. I hate having to find them and put them back on you when it's freezing out and all I want to do is go in where it's warm.
Sincerely,
Your mother who is going to start carrying you around shoeless.

[megsw85]

Dear Children

5 am wakes are not cool

Love your sick mom

[tubamom2]

Dearest Miranda,
I know that you are still learning about the potty and while I appreciate your help in pulling toilet paper off the roll while I am using the potty, I do not need your help wiping.
Love,
Mommy with a few boundaries left

[melohdy]

Dear gods of Friday,

Thank you!

Lunch made
Dinner in slow cooker
Gym bag packed
Toddler fed
Toddler dressed
Toddler wearing [almost] matching socks
Out the door [almost] on time
Got to work [almost] on time

Sincerely,
Got my ish together today

[heelibrarian]

Dearest daughter,

If I have to hold you for your entire nap for the fourth time this week, I'm gonna lose it. Momma needs to eat FFS.

Hugs n stuff,
Your Hangry Mother

[workinit]

Dear D,

Really? So many words you refuse to say, but you have no problem belting out the word PENIS while I'm changing your poopy diaper! And yes... Now we have to wash your hands little man.

Love,
The woman who will be steam cleaning the carpet

[megaroo64]

Dear B,
This is nap time; not sing songs and throw all of your animals out of your bed time. Go to sleep please.

Love,
Your mommy that needs a break

[nachellebeck]

Feb 6, 2015 11:39:58 GMT -5 @emazeem said:

Dear FIL,

Leave! Go to your two other sons houses. You've out stayed your welcome this week.

Sincerely,
Your very annoyed DIL

Does he ever plan on leaving? Or is this an indefinite thing?

You know I can commiserate.

[nachellebeck]

Feb 6, 2015 14:06:15 GMT -5 @emazeem said:

Feb 6, 2015 14:04:57 GMT -5 nachellebeck said:

Does he ever plan on leaving? Or is this an indefinite thing?

You know I can commiserate.

I have no idea. We're supposed to have a "schedule" of him rotating to the other BILs but he just doesn't leave. I don't get it. And to go back to lebanon would be a freakin miracle! A girl can dream

And he's been there for almost a year right?

I've never understood how someone can just leave their home for a seriously extended time (like a year).

[hellooldfriend]

Dear Cal,

A pile of folded laundry, or a basket of matched socks is not an invitation to show off your throwing skills.

Signed,
Your momma who is tired of picking up all the socks, only to turn around and see the room covered in unfolded clothes.

[melohdy]

Feb 6, 2015 14:41:06 GMT -5 hellooldfriend said:

Dear Cal,

A pile of folded laundry, or a basket of matched socks is not an invitation to show off your throwing skills.

Signed,
Your momma who is tired of picking up all the socks, only to turn around and see the room covered in unfolded clothes.

: Lilly does this with all the clothes in her hanging closet organizer.  I really need to get her a dresser. 

[heelibrarian]

Dear daughter,

Oh, a 10 minute nap is sufficient for you today? See you at 6 for your early bedtime.

Love,
The only person in this house who lacks alone time

[michelin82]

Dear Lungs -

Please clear out.

Kthxbai,
Sicky McCoughsALot

[doodletwins]

Dear SIL,
I hate you! Please don't ever talk to me again.
With love,
Me

[melohdy]

Feb 6, 2015 17:40:01 GMT -5 doodletwins said:

Dear SIL,
I hate you! Please don't ever talk to me again.
With love,
Me

I want to love tit but I don't want to love this.  I am sorry for whatever you're dealing with. 

[ciahanna]

Dear Gia,
Please stop clinging to me all day and play with your hoard of toys.I promise I will still love you.Please sleep all night in your crib. I'm tired of being kicked and pinched. Oh,and changing your diaper does not require screams of bloody murder.

Love,
Mommy that misses her space and hearing

[ordinaryme]

Dear mom and dad,
I talked to you extensively over the past few months about myself and my little family moving back in with you for a temporary amount of time. You have been all excited about it, until I've actually started to move my shit in. Stop making comments under your breathe and stop telling me your stressed out, because I don't want to hear it. Also, I got a babysitter this morning so I can do more moving and now your making it a huge deal and making me move my schedule around? I'm about to go all crazy on you, because your really pissing me off.
Oh, one other thing. Stop complaining about your bills and your finances! I don't want to hear it all the time. I have my own life and my own set of stress, I don't need you to pile yours on me too. Besides, you just got back from Cancun and you are going on a cruise in May. I don't want to hear it.
Sincerely,
Your stressed out daughter who is about to sit you down and give it to you straight.
Sorry, that was long.

[peachey]

Dear DH

Thank you so much for letting me get a full nights sleep.

Sincerely
Your wife who feels like a new woman.

[cricket]

Dear H,
Stop making plans with your friends and sleeping until 5 minutes before you are supposed to leave, and then complaining about not getting to see LO. These are your choices and your priorities. I don't care how you spend your time, you work hard, but quit your bitching about things you have control over!!

Sincerely,
Your wife who spends all her time taking care of the kid and house

[lioness13]

Dear SH, Don't complain about being tired and use that as an excuse to be an ass to me then go out instead of resting.

Love,
Your better smarter half

[doodletwins]

Feb 6, 2015 18:03:33 GMT -5 melohdy said:

Feb 6, 2015 17:40:01 GMT -5 doodletwins said:

Dear SIL,
I hate you! Please don't ever talk to me again.
With love,
Me

I want to love tit but I don't want to love this.  I am sorry for whatever you're dealing with. 

Just the dumb SIL I posted about a week or two ago that doesn't believe in IVF. I had to go to a family birthday party and she wants to sit and talk with me like we're best friends.