Shocked to be here (pgal)

[ls2012]

Hello, all. I haven't been on tcf in almost a year. I'm shocked to find myself joining up again, but I know I'll need the support- especially since Dh and I aren't telling anyone until it becomes absolutely necessary.

I'm 35, will be 36 when/if this one comes along. We have a 13yr old and a 2yr old, both girls. Timing isn't great for another, but it was never going to get better at this point in the game. We've had 3 losses...one suspected c/p, one very early, and the last a year ago mmc.

Quite honestly, I'm feeling very jaded about this. To the point that I don't even want to consider making an appt until after 12weeks. I'll take my prenatals, eat healthy, and pray for the best. Though, I reserve the right to change my mind/ enthusiasm level as often as I like. ? Pgal prerogative.

I know this isn't a very jolly intro, but I am happy to be with you all and wish us the very very best on our journeys!

P.S. due February 15th

[kaits8]

Hello there, I'm happy you have joined us! Here's to a happy & healthy 9 months!

[flyinghorses6]

Welcome to F17- hopefully things go smoothly for you!

[wildflower810]

I'm so sorry for your losses. I hope this pregnancy is smooth sailing.

[shellbell]

I'm sorry for your losses. We're here to support you however we can. I'll be hoping that this is your rainbow baby. Welcome!

[pivot]

Welcome! So sorry for your losses. Hope you have a healthy and uneventful 9 months!

[sweetieheart32]

Welcome! We have the same due date So sorry for your losses. FX for a smooth and boring 9 months.

[notagoddess]

Welcome! I am so sorry for your losses. You're not alone in being scared.

[staccajaye]

Welcome and I am sorry for your losses, let's get to that 12 week scan x

[lilyofthevalley]

ls2012, welcome and congrats. PGAL is so tough - it's hard to let yourself be excited, yet at the same time it's impossible not to be. I hope this is your rainbow baby!

[tiffw2012]

I'm so sorry to hear about your previous losses. That must be so hard to feel joy when you don't know what could happen.

Congratulations on this pregnancy and I wish you a very happy and healthy 9 months.

[ImAPepper]

Congrats and welcome. I understand where you're coming from. I've had a few losses myself and it's so hard to feel happy at first. I haven't had long for it to set in, but I'm sure I'll be there in a few days or weeks or both myself. Look forward to seeing you around.

[Deleted]

Welcome! Sorry for your past losses but hope this is a happy and healthy 9months ahead!

[littleredfish]

You absolutely have the right to change how you feel at any time. I'm sorry for your losses, there is no feeling like a loss and also no feeling like trying to be happy with one hanging over your head. Fingers crossed hard for you over here.

[loubug]

Welcome and sorry about your loss. I've had an earlier loss as well. One minute I'm planning all the crafts I'll make and the next I'm imagining the worst at the first appointment. I got cold chills calling the dr and making the appt. Let yourself feel how you do without any expectations on how "should" feel. Always easier said than done of course.

[oldbaylover1024]

I'm a loss mom, too, and your feelings are completely warranted. We aren't telling anyone IRL until probably about 17w, like we did with our first. The rollercoaster of emotions is okay, too. Let it happen. I live by the mantra that today I am pregnant and I love my baby. {{hugs}}

Congrats and welcome!

[PepperPottsJ]

I'm so sorry for you losses!! Congratulations and all the hugs!