Working Moms Check In 6/24

[mtnmomma13]

Better late than never!

I read this article yesterday and it really struck a chord with me. Are you super helpful at work? I'm naturally a people person and have a tendency to help others before myself. I really felt it start wearing on me the past year. This particularly hit home: "Somewhat ironically, the draining effects of helping are worse for employees who have high pro-social motivation. When these folks are asked for help, they feel a strong obligation to provide help, which can be especially taxing."

1. Are you guilty of over-helping at work? Are you able to find ways to recharge? If you aren't an over-helper, what tips do you have for those of us that are!?

2. How are things at work?

3. How are things at home? LO do anything funny this week?

4. GTKY: Since we've just done a bunch of outdoor home improvements, I'm curious what improvements you'd like to do to your living space!

[sunfrogger88]

1. Yes. I have a hard time with it especially in my role because that's what I do. It's hard to show value outside of how many people you help.

2. Work is bad. There's a lot of change still coming and I'm nervous. But I have a great WFH arrangement right now and we can't afford daycare so I am kind of stuck.

3. So we are walking with our walk/ride toy. So there's that.

4. We have a looot to do with our outside. It needs some serious love, landscaping wise. Anything else we plan to do once we evaluate the market when we get closer to when we want to sell.

[mtnmomma13]

1. Are you guilty of over-helping at work? Are you able to find ways to recharge? If you aren't an over-helper, what tips do you have for those of us that are!?
I am. I think in general, I want to be helpful and get things done, but mostly it comes from feeling like I can do it faster myself. I often feel like by "helping" I'm creating less work for me, but what I felt like it started doing in my last job was enabling those around me to not do their jobs. Which is why I got so burnt out. I was doing my job, and their job. Its something I really appreciate about my current team. Everyone is helpful when needed, but we all pull our own weight. Much better than the previous team.

2. How are things at work?
FREAKING BUSY! I feel like I'm running 90 miles an hour all the time. But it's good and I'm still enjoying it.

3. How are things at home? LO do anything funny this week?
I think she is learning how to wave. She's done it a couple times at daycare and at home. So we'll see if that continues. She is killin' the food lately. She swiped a piece of chicken off my plate yesterday (cut in an adult bite size portion) and I spent at least 60 secs trying to pry her mouth open to get it out so she didn't choke. She's fast and determined when it comes to food.

4. GTKY: Since we've just done a bunch of outdoor home improvements, I'm curious what improvements you'd like to do to your living space
I really want to redo our bathrooms. We redid our kitchen/living room last spring, spent a bunch on the yard this summer, so I'm hoping next year we can at least do the main bathroom. It's a weird layout and not super functional. We'll see what finances look like next year.

[kensie5226]

1. Nope. I do my job and we all work as a team. I volunteer for things and definitely pull my weight, but I expect others to do their job and I don't step in to do it for them.

2. Work's great. I have my first overnight travel in mid-July, but I'm ready. It's just one afternoon, night, and morning. I know I can do it.

3. She's got a tooth, walking with assistance, standing with one hand. Still struggling to pull herself to sitting though so at least she can't get to a standing position on her own.

4. Well frankly I'd move. This house is fine, but it's not our forever home by any means.

[colinsfebmommy]

1. Are you guilty of over-helping at work? Are you able to find ways to recharge? If you aren't an over-helper, what tips do you have for those of us that are!?
I'm not an over helper because there isn't a need for that at our company but if someone asked for help I'd be happy to.

2. How are things at work?
Good, I had to give a review to the new girl, she wasn't pleased with me, oh well lmao she's exhausting

3. How are things at home? LO do anything funny this week?
Things at home are ok, it's a work in progress. LO is just hysterical but is a diva! God forbid you take you take something from her she has an epic meltdown complete with shaking arms lmao

4. GTKY: Since we've just done a bunch of outdoor home improvements, I'm curious what improvements you'd like to do to your living space!
Ahhhhhhh so f-ing many, so so many. Starting with redoing the basement and kitchen. Or make the decision to move.

[themrsjrd]

1. Are you guilty of over-helping at work? Are you able to find ways to recharge? If you aren't an over-helper, what tips do you have for those of us that are!?

Eh, I don't think I'm an over-helper. I'm helpful, but maybe it's just that my job isn't too demanding so I don't feel like I have too much on my plate.

2. How are things at work?

Fine- still trying to adjust to the 4-10 schedule. Love Fridays off. Hate waking up early. Being out of the house for over 11 hours makes for a long day.

I'm also considering getting a real estate license and attempting to make some money doing that part time. The market is so hot right meow. But I'm afraid of the start up cost and making things like showings work when my husband does shift work.

3. How are things at home? LO do anything funny this week?

He is just all over the place. He is a pro at standing up and walking along furniture now. He definitely does things for a reaction now. If we laugh at him, he laughs and continues to do whatever he is doing. He is not responding well to "no" yet, haha. Any suggestions about that?

His top two teeth are coming in so that is a lot of fun. One is pretty much in, the other isn't far behind.

4. GTKY: Since we've just done a bunch of outdoor home improvements, I'm curious what improvements you'd like to do to your living space!

We just moved into a new house, so there's not a lot at the top of my list in terms of major projects. We are replacing all the door knobs from satin nickel knobs to oil rubbed bronze levers (exciting, I know). We just painted the living room and I hated every second of that (MH was "tired of every wall in the house being beige"). We have plans to replace a few light fixtures. Outside, I want to extend the fence and widen the driveway a bit and make a bigger patio out back.

When I list it out like that it sounds like a lot. I'm sure these things will take us the rest of the year to complete.

[sassypantzz]

1. Are you guilty of over-helping at work? No, I guess because I manage I really preach accountability and work load. I can't judge whats on your plate and the need for more staffing if it all just appears done. I need to know when people struggle.
Are you able to find ways to recharge? Oh yea! I think a lot of it has to do with my dynamic at work.
If you aren't an over-helper, what tips do you have for those of us that are!? It is ok to say no, or politely decline. You need to focus on yourself. It is ok to be selfish and it doesn't make you mean or wrong.

2. How are things at work? Fantastic

3. How are things at home? Good- about to be easier as DH just finished his summer semester LO do anything funny this week? He learned to clap

4. GTKY: Since we've just done a bunch of outdoor home improvements, I'm curious what improvements you'd like to do to your living space! I would like a new space to live in?? COME ON DH GRADUATION!

[ldubhawksfan]

1. Are you guilty of over-helping at work? Are you able to find ways to recharge? If you aren't an over-helper, what tips do you have for those of us that are!? It depends. Probably not as much since returning from leave. I just DGAF about blogging myself down with extra work.

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2. How are things at work? Ok. Boss has been gone and I'm realizing how little it looks like I've accomplished even though I did a lot of detailed design. Meh.

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3. How are things at home? LO do anything funny this week? Good. DD seems like she's close to figuring out crawling, but also maybe stretching to walking soon thereafter. She stood unassisted yesterday and would just much rather be up than horizontal.

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4. GTKY: Since we've just done a bunch of outdoor home improvements, I'm curious what improvements you'd like to do to your living space! I want to build a planter bed/garden. I haven't gotten over the hurdle of how to transport the volume of dirt up several flights worth of stairs to the top of our backyard.

[winogirl]

1. I do a lot of helping - but that is also kind of my role. My aim on most days is to help others help themselves. So - if they ask for help I try to see what I can do to make it easier for them without doing everything for them. Can I send an email to the person I know they need to touch base with and get them connected? Can I review a draft for them (instead of writing it myself)? That kind of stuff. Usually I try to ask people "how do you want me to help you in this situation?" and if it is an opportunity for them to get their name out there or a chance to grow in a skill I'll present that to them and let them decide where to go with it.

2. How are things at work? Pretty good - now that I got the go ahead to come up with a schedule (be it WFH, flexible hours, part-time, combo of all) I am feeling really great. My manager did just point out that she is removing my name from the nominees for a leadership program for this year which sucks a tiny bit but is honestly the right call for now - she has assured me she would get me in it next year once we are more solidified with whatever schedule I land on.

3. How are things at home? LO do anything funny this week?
Tough - I took all last week off and getting back into a schedule is hard. Plus teething, plus DH is sick so everyone is a little crabby and a whole lot tired. Hopefully we can get to the weekend and recharge.

4. GTKY: Since we've just done a bunch of outdoor home improvements, I'm curious what improvements you'd like to do to your living space!

Sell it? I'm SOOOOO ready to be out of this house and somewhere better/safer but there is nothing in our preferred neighborhoods right now so we have to keep looking. ugh