Post by rslh10 on Jul 13, 2016 9:08:51 GMT -5
Hi guys,
I know it's only July but I just know the Holiday season is going to sneak up on me so fast and I don't want to be in a bad place when it does.
What did you do to handle the holiday season better after your loss. I know mine is going to be extremely hard because Kenley was born 4 days after Christmas. I will forever hate it now I think. I want to be able to find joy in this Holiday again, if only for my son and future children.
I am having a hard time with thinking about decorations and giving gifts etc. I'm seriously so afraid of being triggered by all things holiday related. We listened to Christmas music starting the day after Halloween last year, and Kenley would dance around in my belly loving it. I want to smash the cd now. I don't want to feel these things but I just know I'm going to.
I'm hoping to be pregnant again during the holidays this year, and I'm sure that will "help" but honestly it freaks me the fuck out thinking about being so during those times again. I know every pregnancy is different and all of that but, I want to try to prepare myself.
I know I won't be able to really prepare myself because I'm going to feel whatever I feel and I'm alright with that...I just don't want to fall apart. I also don't want to forget her, or not do something special for her birthday because of the busy season.
I just hate this so much. I wish my brain would relax for a second but I don't think that's possible. I've been struggling emotionally and mentally a little since I have my transfer coming up on Monday. I'm so incredibly nervous and everything just seems to wrap up into one giant ball of emotions in my mind.
I'm not looking for advice, really, just more of how you handled it. I'm going to be nearly a year out from her death, so I'm assuming it will be a little easier than the dark days immediately after her death. Sigh. I hate that we all even have to think about this shit. Thank you guys for being amazing. Your strength has held me up so much these past 6 months. Thank you.
I know it's only July but I just know the Holiday season is going to sneak up on me so fast and I don't want to be in a bad place when it does.
What did you do to handle the holiday season better after your loss. I know mine is going to be extremely hard because Kenley was born 4 days after Christmas. I will forever hate it now I think. I want to be able to find joy in this Holiday again, if only for my son and future children.
I am having a hard time with thinking about decorations and giving gifts etc. I'm seriously so afraid of being triggered by all things holiday related. We listened to Christmas music starting the day after Halloween last year, and Kenley would dance around in my belly loving it. I want to smash the cd now. I don't want to feel these things but I just know I'm going to.
I'm hoping to be pregnant again during the holidays this year, and I'm sure that will "help" but honestly it freaks me the fuck out thinking about being so during those times again. I know every pregnancy is different and all of that but, I want to try to prepare myself.
I know I won't be able to really prepare myself because I'm going to feel whatever I feel and I'm alright with that...I just don't want to fall apart. I also don't want to forget her, or not do something special for her birthday because of the busy season.
I just hate this so much. I wish my brain would relax for a second but I don't think that's possible. I've been struggling emotionally and mentally a little since I have my transfer coming up on Monday. I'm so incredibly nervous and everything just seems to wrap up into one giant ball of emotions in my mind.
I'm not looking for advice, really, just more of how you handled it. I'm going to be nearly a year out from her death, so I'm assuming it will be a little easier than the dark days immediately after her death. Sigh. I hate that we all even have to think about this shit. Thank you guys for being amazing. Your strength has held me up so much these past 6 months. Thank you.