Daycare.

[madamewaffles]

Saw some DC talk on randoms and thought it'd be good to have a thread dedicated to it. I think there are already a few of us work-outside-home moms back at work and coming up on some of us who will be returning soon.

1) What's your daycare sitch?

2) BTDT moms, any tips for first time families/what to expect?

[ellebelle]

Thanks for starting a thread!

1) Irene will start daycare on November 7th. She'll be going 4 days a week at the center where DD1 went.

2) Honestly my best words of wisdom are that it's probably harder on you than them. I cried driving to work the entire first week I went back with DD1. Remembering that I was doing this to give her a better life and things that she would want and need was helpful. In terms of tips having everything packed and ready by the door the night before was key. It can be crazy in the morning!

[melody330]

1) B will be 5.5 months when he goes to DC. It's the same class that ds1 was in, but there's all new teachers. ds1 will be in the other building. They both will be going 5x/week for about 7 hours.

2) The women who work there are magically. Your kid doesn't sleep? Doesn't take a bottle? Hates the world? Don't worry about it- they have seen it before and have some magical solution to fix it.

Also- let things go. When you go back to work there is a big adjustment period where you all find your new normal. I would cry that I only had a few awake hours with DS1 before bedtime. One day you will look up and realize that you sort of fall into a new routine.

[littlesthobo]

1. DS1 is enrolled in a centre two days per week and both he and L will go there full time when I go back to work.

2. If you can take your LO to visit once or twice before they start, it really helps the transition and helped me get a better feel for the routines so I felt more comfortable.

I second pre-packing everything the night before. Also I like to get up, get myself ready and pack the car before I get DS1 up. I get him dressed, fed and out the door quickly before he gets distracted with toys or whatnot.

Eat easy meals. I like to have dinner, clean up, and spend an hour just playing before bedtime.

I also made a point to arrive at work 30 minutes early to create a "buffer zone" of time should shit hit the fan. One morning DS1 smashed his head really badly right before we left, so I was able to wait for a bit to assess how he was and ice it before we left. And I enjoy using my buffer time to drink coffee in silence and catch up on TCF!

[sarcaztic10]

1) What's your daycare sitch? S will be going to DC 5 days a week for about 9 hours a day.

I have no BTDT tips for babies because L wasn't put in DC until he was 18 months old.

I am just hoping that S does well and that we are able to get into a good routine/rhythm. After I pick up S I will have to pick up L from his after school program and then get home to work on homework and cook dinner. It's going to be hectic after work every day.

[sarcaztic10]

I have a lot of anxiety over the fact that I will not be the one dropping S off at DC in the morning. H will drop off S after L gets on the bus and I will pick them up. I have a lot of feelings about not being the one to drop him off for the first time or any time after that.

[melody330]

Sept 19, 2016 16:00:26 GMT -5 sarcaztic10 said:

I have a lot of anxiety over the fact that I will not be the one dropping S off at DC in the morning. H will drop off S after L gets on the bus and I will pick them up. I have a lot of feelings about not being the one to drop him off for the first time or any time after that.

Do you have anxiety about it or are you upset about missing out?

DH always calls me after drops DS1 off. It helps with my anxiety about him being okay and not being left in the car (I know this is irrational, and I recognize that).

[Susan0utLoud]

My mom will be watching both the kids (toddler ds is almost 2.5 yo). Dh drops them off at 8:30ish and I pick them up at about 4:30pm. I am lucky that my work is super flexible about when I arrive and leave each day. Basically, get your work done, don't abuse the flexibility and all is fine.

Getting as much ready the night before is crucial to morning success. I lay out clothes for everyone, put shoes out by the door, pack lunches, set the coffee pot to auto start at 6am, make bottles and get my work bag (paperwork, laptop, etc.) ready. It took a few weeks to get into the groove of things, but we were used to the new normal in no time.

When I went back to work after ds, I asked my mom to send pictures and texts a lot. It helped with the transition. We also had a rule that she would never tell us when a firsts happened (rolling over, walking, etc.) so that we could experience them. She respected it and we loved getting to experience every first on our own. We have the same rule with this one.

I go back to work this Wednesday!!

[katelou]

i guess I'm no longer a WM but wanted to add a a tip that I found helpful for those pumping and serving BM...

Since the BM bottles and ice pack for the pump's bottle cooler can't be laid out the night before, I had a gigantic note stuck on the front of the fridge reminding me to grab them.

I also had a checklist of stuff I needed by the door that I double checked every morning. Mine was- pump, pump parts/empty bottles, bag of BM bottles for baby, work bag, my lunch bag.

[sarcaztic10]

Sept 19, 2016 16:06:23 GMT -5 melody330 said:

Sept 19, 2016 16:00:26 GMT -5 sarcaztic10 said:

I have a lot of anxiety over the fact that I will not be the one dropping S off at DC in the morning. H will drop off S after L gets on the bus and I will pick them up. I have a lot of feelings about not being the one to drop him off for the first time or any time after that.

Do you have anxiety about it or are you upset about missing out?

DH always calls me after drops DS1 off. It helps with my anxiety about him being okay and not being left in the car (I know this is irrational, and I recognize that).

I worry about the same thing and also that H will forget my breast milk or something. I am also sad that o really won't see him in the morning because I will leave at 5:30 am.

[acorn99]

1) What's your daycare sitch?

My DC sitch up and fucked itself last week when my H FINALLY came to realization that his mom isn't a reliable babywatcher (She was watching J 2x a month before A was born). So I have been dealing with the fucking stress of re-working things. It is now only 20% fucked. I stay home on Mondays, then they are in DC Tues-Thurs and Fridays they are with either my H or my parents. But since we were late to getting this Thursday spot, we might have to drop to Tues-Weds in January because of lack of space in the infant room. If only SOMEONE had listened to me during DC registration in the Spring about my concerns, we would be fine........coughDHcough......

Sorry for the rant. This was not what I wanted to be worrying about last week during my first week back to work. 

2) BTDT moms, any tips for first time families/what to expect?

FEELS. You will have them. Let them come, because the first couple of weeks back to work are hard. But it will get easier, I promise. My other best advice is to have as much ready the night before as you can. Have milk in bottles ready to go, have all your pump stuff packed up. Have everyone's clothes ready and pack lunch the night before, if you are a lunch bringer. Having that sort of stuff ready means you can enjoy a few more of the morning snuggles instead of running about like a crazy person.

Also, set aside worries you have about all the stuff your baby doesn't do at home. J NEVER slept in his crib at home (not for lack of trying), but the first day when I went to pick him up, BOOM. Sleeping in there like a boss. Daycare ladies are amazing, and your baby will do great. 

Other thing to think about: for the first few weeks if you can, do some simple meal planning. I know when I came home with J, all I wanted to do was snuggle so I made sure we had easy to put together or frozen dinners so that I could nurse and snuggle and relax when I got home. 

It can be overwhelming getting everything done at first, but before long you get the new routine down and everything works out. 

[icaughtfire]

Sept 19, 2016 17:58:35 GMT -5 Susan0utLoud said:

My mom will be watching both the kids (toddler ds is almost 2.5 yo). Dh drops them off at 8:30ish and I pick them up at about 4:30pm. I am lucky that my work is super flexible about when I arrive and leave each day. Basically, get your work done, don't abuse the flexibility and all is fine.

Getting as much ready the night before is crucial to morning success. I lay out clothes for everyone, put shoes out by the door, pack lunches, set the coffee pot to auto start at 6am, make bottles and get my work bag (paperwork, laptop, etc.) ready. It took a few weeks to get into the groove of things, but we were used to the new normal in no time.

When I went back to work after ds, I asked my mom to send pictures and texts a lot. It helped with the transition. We also had a rule that she would never tell us when a firsts happened (rolling over, walking, etc.) so that we could experience them. She respected it and we loved getting to experience every first on our own. We have the same rule with this one.

I go back to work this Wednesday!!

My MIL is watching E and I really like the idea of her not telling us about firsts! I have enough guilt about missing out in the first place, knowing that MIL gets to experience them makes me salty. I hope she'll be respectful enough to agree to that. Thanks for the idea! 😊

[melody330]

Ds1 walked at DC before we saw it. They never said anything. I saw him do it at pickup one day and she was like "woohooo!! You saw! He's been doing that for a week!" It was nice to spontaneously see it for myself!