Post by wineallthetime on Oct 10, 2016 16:38:51 GMT -5
I have an ex who I thought I'd end up with. I always thought he was "the one that got away", even in the beginning of my relationship with H. Now I'm relieved he broke up with me and we didn't make the mistake of gettimg married. I don't think it would have ended well at all!
Post by rubykitten on Oct 10, 2016 18:18:38 GMT -5
H is my high school sweetheart so there's really no one to compare to in that way. Sometimes I think about what it might have been like to actually date people or meet someone as an adult and not have "grown up" with them. But that's not my life and I'm happy with my marriage and where I am. I only had one "first" too. First kiss, first falling in love, etc. Sometimes, I think that might be a negative, but it makes it easy for me and H because there is no insecurity of that "person before me" which is nice
While I have no ill feelings toward any of my ex boyfriends, non of them fit quite right for forever. I am very happy with DH, and the amazing little family we have.
Not to say I never have fleeting thoughts of what if, but I also wonder what if I had gone to a different college, or accepted a different job, just out of curiosity. Not in a one who got away sense.
Post by craftcrazymama on Oct 12, 2016 3:52:51 GMT -5
This should definitely be on a private board but here goes anyway.
I don't regret finishing with most of my exes, but there are two that I wonder about. One isn't because I want to be with him or ever have since we split (my ex husband) but I do sometimes think about how different my life would be if we'd somehow worked it out. He didn't want kids, was very materialistic and always wanted to go home to the UK (which he has now). None of those things were me but what if I had made them so....
The other is definitely the one that got away. He is a guy I use to work with who contracted to my team. I crushed on him for ages but never thought anything would happen because a) i was married and b) he was out of my league. It was just a fantasy thing and I never expected to have anything happen. But it did, and I fell madly in love with him. After the first time we acted on those feelings I knew my marriage was over (it had been for a while but this totally sealed it for me). I separated from my husband and this guy and I had a full on thing. Lots of partying and fully paid business trips to Aussie and amazing nights in great hotels.
But, it couldn't carry on. We were in different places in our lives, the pace and the style we were conducting all this in wasn't sustainable and I knew I had some healing to do from my marriage before I could be with anyone. I had to pull away and it was heartbreaking to do. The missing him was intense but I knew it was right.
I still wonder how it could have gone and I still have fond memories of those days but I also would never trade my husband, my kids and our life for what ifs. That chapter is closed and I'm glad of it.
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