Special Ed support group

[Deleted]

Our school has a parents of special ed students meeting each month.  I haven't been to one yet.  This month, they labelled it as a support group with childcare.  However, they did not say special needs, so I was confused.  But anyway, I got a second e-mail saying it is for special needs parents.

So maybe they have a regular meeting and a support group meeting? 

Has anyone been to one of these?  Also they offer childcare, but I also have a 3 year old, so I don't know if that would apply to her or only for the school age children. 

[mrsbuttinski]

Is this group a SEPTA? (special education PTA)

That's interesting. Some schools actively discourage parents of kids with IEPs from getting together and sharing ideas- they take a divide and conquer strategy that allows them to prevail over families who don't understand their rights.

I can see where the school would refer to this as meeting using a Parents of Students with an IEP/Sec 504. My district would. Language matters- person first is correct. "Special needs" is kind of a euphemism that lacks real parameters in a school setting. When teachers talk about special needs in a school, they are often looking at broader socioeconomic factors (poverty, parental neglect), personal circumstances (a child with a chronic illness, whose parents are divorcing) or a combination of the two (a child in the foster care system). By limiting it to those children receiving special education services, they have a ready-made threshold for membership and can avoid parents who are seeking special consideration outside of special education.

Not sure about childcare. I would call for clarification. At DS's school, child care was open to siblings- but those with babies and younger toddlers seemed to make other arrangements. Strictly speaking, under IDEA a three is a school-aged child. I would expect a three to be included and have a blast.

I would give it a try. IME, combining parents of kids with diverse degrees and types of impairments seldom goes well.

[Deleted]

It doesn't read like PTA but could be. I'm fairly certain that they are using 504 IEP Criteria for the invite especially because it wasn't on the calendar- seems to be invite only.

That was my concern. I would go for the parents that have kids with hearing loss. I've learned a lot from you all don't get me wrong but that is the area I need the most assistance and if those parents don't attend...

I don't get the impression the school district is trying to divide and conquer or keep people from knowing their rights. They seem to be actively testing kids to see if they need more help but if parent doesn't ask that may be where they fall through the cracks. School doesn't see it right away or on their tests, parent is in denial or doesn't see it doesn't ask them nothing happens. I mean some parents don't know or don't advocate. It's nothing against them if they thought there was something wrong I'm sure they would. Or they are afraid like H was of our kid being labeled perhaps.

[mrsbuttinski]

It would be great if you could pick the brain of a BTDT parent whose child also has hearing loss. They would have ideas about what sort of accommodations and supports tended to be most effective in the classroom.

In many places, the sort of kid who falls through the cracks is the kind who doesn't act out. My niece's youngest half-brother recently changed schools and now attends the same one DS did. They almost immediately picked up on his differences and evaluated him. He's got his educational ASD dx back and is on a fairly comprehensive IEP. His previous school removed his label as he transitioned to kindie. I cautioned mom against being flattered out of it, but she was of the "rescued from autism" mindset since he'd acquired speech.

[KC thepouchh8r]

Dec 2, 2016 4:57:14 GMT -5 mrsbuttinski said:

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I would give it a try. IME, combining parents of kids with diverse degrees and types of impairments seldom goes well.

Huh, we've had the opposite experience. I found the asd specific group was more combative/less accepting towards each other that the umbrella special needs group has been. Of course, like anything else it probably has more to do with the particular group/its members.

[mamaturtle]

I would try to go to one meeting and try it. I would take advantage of the onsite babysitting.

My ASD support group started off like this when DS was 3. I would take DS so he can play with all the kids like a social group. I wish our support group would meet like we use to with the onsite babysitting. Parents were able to talk to each other and help each other out. Now it is all social events now for the kids.

[mrsbuttinski]

Dec 2, 2016 10:37:47 GMT -5 KC thepouchh8r said:

Dec 2, 2016 4:57:14 GMT -5 mrsbuttinski said:

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I would give it a try. IME, combining parents of kids with diverse degrees and types of impairments seldom goes well.

Huh, we've had the opposite experience. I found the asd specific group was more combative/less accepting towards each other that the umbrella special needs group has been. Of course, like anything else it probably has more to do with the particular group/its members.

I think you kind of misunderstood me. 

When I was describing the above, it was from my experience with several local ASD groups. As you said, these groups include a broad dx and can be pretty fractious. Wander into one that isn't a good fit and things go south pretty quickly.

For example there's one group locally that is aligned with TACA- they mostly believe in things like vaccine injury, gut theory, GFCF, hyperbaric chambers, etc. There's a more mainstream group that I first visited when DS was initially dxd in 2000. Their kids all presented in a more classically Kanner's manner- they didn't have to fight for IEP services around speech or protection from bullies. Their kids were in self contained classrooms served by highly trained ASD professionals who kept them safe. They were warm and welcoming, but they had little to offer around how to advocate for speech when I kid spoke more eloquently than his teachers or how to manage situations like driving and college. It was a couple years before I found a group with was specific to AS and that had the BTDT kind of support/information I was looking for.