Thursday TWERKing (Updates)

[erinshelley21]

Pregnancy: Despite having gestational diabetes, the baby was measuring 3-4 weeks behind last week. My fluid was also low. Those landed me on the schedule for NSTs 2x/week and a BPP every Thursday. NST on Monday went well so we will see how the ultrasound/BPP go today. Between the pelvic rest in the beginning, progesterone shot mess, constant sickness, the GD, and now this, we are 99% sure we are done after this baby.

Moving/Not Moving Dilemma: I finally called our mortgage lady yesterday. She is looking at DH's app from last time with the job and salary change and should be calling me back this morning to start going over our options. DH arrived home yesterday afternoon to someone blocking our driveway who then proceeded to pull into our yard between our camper and the trees to get out of his way. We had the wrong expectations of what living on a dead end would be like. Hopefully we get some decent news today.

Electricity stealing tenant: He is causing us zero trouble and was actually very helpful in helping us winterize the house. My brother and I don't have the extra funds to pay for what needs done to get power turned back on yet, so the house was winterized and water was shut off. I really feel bad for the guy because his baby mama really screwed him. If our business was as successful as it was when my dad was alive, I would let him stay there. We should have about 60% of what he owes us in a week or so.

[saraml13]

Professional clothes: Thanks for the outlet mall suggestions! I went yesterday and got a medium gray pantsuit at Banana Republic ($90) and black slacks at Nordstrom Rack ($40).

@helenhandbasket - how is the wedding planning coming?

[judyblume14]

Baby - will be 3 weeks tomorrow. Surpassed her birthweight by a half-POUND (not a half-hour) as of her two week check-in! This is a million miles different than DD1 who lost a lot of weight after birth and didn't catch back up for almost 8 weeks.

My H went back to work yesterday. We survived. I even got all the bathrooms cleaned, got the toddler's lunch food prepped for the rest of the week, and got some laundry done.

I did start to freak a little bit about returning to work. When will I clean bathrooms then?

[oldbaylover1024]

Martha is upset that she's not in the running for godmother of this baby. Ummm... what? She's pretty much shut off all communication with me and, frankly, we've grown extremely distant over the past year. So... no.

Also, still pregnant. C-section is scheduled for next Friday, 2/10. FX I don't make it that far.

MH got a raise! We weren't expecting him to get one this year because of the way his office is running, so it's a total surprise! He deserves it. They also want him promoted by year-end. His manager mentioned it in December, but with a baby coming and MH taking paternity leave it didn't seem like a responsible decision. So they held a position for him! Whaaaaat?!

[rere26]

judyblume14 that is my weekly question since going full time. I usually take on chore a night so that my weekend isn't just a bunch of cleaning.

Well, I am not sure where I am on my ulcer. I still have another month of prescription antacids. I still have the churning and upset stomach at times, but no pain. So hopefully getting better. I hope this stomach upset isn't ongoing. No drinks for me since no years, Dh too. We are both looking at our health on the coming year, plus he says he is working on his beach body? ?! Mkay.

Still waiting on bids for our home addition. However, I do believe the financial gods are not in favor since we keep getting hit with broken appliances. Yesterday the main living room TV bit the dust.

[judyblume14]

rere26, this summer, I worked from home once a week and tried to get a few chores done then. But that's a pretty irresponsible way to work-from home, you know? We didn't have this issue when we lived in our tiny condo. But now that we have this big house, we have this big FWP...

[oldbaylover1024]

judyblume14 - Sometimes I say I miss living in an apartment where I only had to clean a small space. Then, I remember our neighbors and I think, "Maaaaaybe not..." LOL

rere26 - Sorry about the ulcer. MH has one and it's no fun at all. FX the antacids help and you can find a balance in your diet that allows *some* adult beverage. You deserve it!

[akafred]

Hallelujah, the chiro gods have decided after this week I will drop down to twice a week. OMG Charlotte is driving me frigging insane. Last night she went wild in the PT room and tried to kill herself by putting a yoga ball on a rolly chair, and then went under the desk in the adjustment room and turned off the power strip, causing the computer and everything else to turn off and on. It's like she steps through a time machine and is 2 instead of 7.5. Every single time. Also her teachers are going to start helping on Wednesdays so she can have one teacher drive her to the other teacher's house and babysit her there (because it is close to chiro office). So that will leave once a week and I already have someone to take her every other Monday for a play date. Maybe I can do this.

My MIL saw the plastic surgeon last week. She cut off some dead skin and said it should heal a little better. The skin graft did not take over the tendons including Achilles, but it will eventually heal it just may take months. So, mixed results. At least no more surgeries for now.

I would really like to move. That is my next big money goal.

[akafred]

Feb 2, 2017 10:13:55 GMT -5 judyblume14 said:

rere26, this summer, I worked from home once a week and tried to get a few chores done then. But that's a pretty irresponsible way to work-from home, you know? We didn't have this issue when we lived in our tiny condo. But now that we have this big house, we have this big FWP...

Eh. How much time do you spend at the office not working? Chit chat, unproductive meetings, TCF. For me there is a lot because a lot of what I do involves queries and processes that run while I wait for them. If I were home and could fold laundry, cool.

[k3am]

judyblume14, I don't do bathrooms. Isabel does our bathrooms. She is a goddess and I love her. Worth every penny, even on the occasions that she does a half-assed job.

[k3am]

Feb 2, 2017 10:23:29 GMT -5 akafred said:

Feb 2, 2017 10:13:55 GMT -5 judyblume14 said:

rere26 , this summer, I worked from home once a week and tried to get a few chores done then. But that's a pretty irresponsible way to work-from home, you know? We didn't have this issue when we lived in our tiny condo. But now that we have this big house, we have this big FWP...

Eh. How much time do you spend at the office not working? Chit chat, unproductive meetings, TCF. For me there is a lot because a lot of what I do involves queries and processes that run while I wait for them. If I were home and could fold laundry, cool.

Also, don't forget your commute. On days I work from home, I save about an HOUR in combined commute, so I don't feel guilty spending that hour elsewhere. And I also have the ability to work while pumping, which adds another hour and a half of productivity to my day. So all in all, that's and extra 2.5 hours that I don't have when I'm in the office.

[judyblume14]

Feb 2, 2017 10:32:18 GMT -5 k3am said:

Feb 2, 2017 10:23:29 GMT -5 akafred said:

Eh. How much time do you spend at the office not working? Chit chat, unproductive meetings, TCF. For me there is a lot because a lot of what I do involves queries and processes that run while I wait for them. If I were home and could fold laundry, cool.

Also, don't forget your commute. On days I work from home, I save about an HOUR in combined commute, so I don't feel guilty spending that hour elsewhere. And I also have the ability to work while pumping, which adds another hour and a half of productivity to my day. So all in all, that's and extra 2.5 hours that I don't have when I'm in the office.

I mean, akafred,k3am, you both present great arguments.  Thing is, I still sometimes do all the bullshitting, TCFing, etc, in ADDITION to the other at-home distractions. Oh well. You've convinced me that it's okay.

As for Isabel. We've considered hiring a cleaning company, but for now, any extra $ we come across would first go to a pool cleaner or landscaping company (so over my H spending 4 hours on the weekend cutting the grass...)

[erinshelley21]

judyblume14, you're giving me so much hope for all of my fears for baby #2. DS lost a shit ton of weight and took forever to catch up, so I'm really hoping that doesn't happen again. Also, clean the bathrooms while you WFH. Justify it by considering them your work bathrooms since they are the ones you use while WFH.

oldbaylover1024, Come on baby! And congrats to your H!

[Deleted]

DH's boss has backed off a bit.  I guess he is always like this is January.  So H still feels pressure but he is not getting yelled at anymore.  He is attempting to fix his team, and has project management under control, so going better.

I am still seriously considering going part time when both kids are in full time school.  The difference between before and after care is the same as the decrease in my salary.  This is a few years off though especially because of half day K, so basically in 2.5 years.   I think my boss would consider it because it saves the company money. 

My job is going fine, but some people I work with are on my last nerve.  I may take tomorrow off, but not sure if I want to use up a vacation day.  I mean the person won't stop talking to me narrating the news and the mail (she goes through the company mail) and was filing her nails.  And lots of personal problems that she is having. 

[helenahhandbasket]

Congrats to your H on the raise and the eviction date oldbaylover1024!

saraml13- it's going! We actually pushed the wedding back 6 weeks to the last Friday in April 2018 because it's the last date before the prices increase AND we are pretty much guaranteed no snow. It also opens up the possibility of an outdoor ceremony.

I have photog and DJ booked and I did buy a dress!

[oldbaylover1024]

helenahhandbasket - OMG! You know eventually you'll need to start your own wedding thread, right?!

[somebabiesmom]

Update: This Whole30 thing blows.

[CoverGirl82]

I mentioned painting before and how I like the current tan color we have in most of our main living area, but DH wanted something different. I found a neutral color that I like ("Quiet Moments" by Benjamin Moore) that DH agreed to. I'm also planning to paint a navy blue color on our fireplace wall in the our living room and maybe the wall our front door is on. DH and I will do some of the painting and then hire a professional to do the living room and entry way (the entry way is open to the second floor, and I am not getting on a scaffold or stilts to paint).

@clarypax, I dream of working part time. I hope it works out for you!

Confession: I usually do laundry or some vacuuming when I work from home. I have found it usually adds up to the same amount of time I spend talking with coworkers, going to get a coffee or water refill, walking across the building to use the restroom, etc.

[librarychica]

Work is going well. Lots of back-and-forth on the idea of an internal transfer or going PT elsewhere. I was pretty firm on my requirements with the outside group and they disappeared but then they came back? I'm enjoying my job quite a bit lately, though, so we will see. I've also been working quite a bit over overtime, though.

DD1 continues to act out. Last night we had a bit of a breakthrough. She seems to be struggling a lot with the long days at school and with the pressure of it. She wishes she could be the baby and go with DD2 to the baby room. I don't think her teachers are harsh and I know they get downtime, but she seems to have the combo of H's intellect (my husband was a kid genius and a teacher's self-motivated dream) and my sometimes-overwhelming desire to please. So that's a combo. I am prioritizing snuggles and downtime in the evenings, postponing her planned start of gymnastics and considering getting a few precooked dinners a week so as to better focus on her (and her sister too).

[helenahhandbasket]

Feb 2, 2017 12:22:39 GMT -5 oldbaylover1024 said:

helenahhandbasket - OMG! You know eventually you'll need to start your own wedding thread, right?!

Ha! Maybe as I get to really planning , I might have questions because I have not had a wedding reception before

[mae0111]

PDQ as I may shave off some details later...

So I posted a brief update yesterday about my job. Here's a bit more...

My manager of 14 years was let go at the end of the year. I now report (on a temporary basis) directly to 2 separate executives, who have conflicting opinions on everything. I also have a loose matrix reporting line to another executive in another country. They're trying to hire a permanent head of the department; that person will have the crazy reporting line, and I would supposedly answer only to one person. It's an administrative nightmare, because there's no one handling things like seating plans, budget breakdowns, etc. So my colleagues and I have to do it, in addition to our day jobs. The hours are long, and people are dumping more and more work on us.

DH is becoming a part owner and partner in his new company. Business is booming, and he loves it. As a result, he's traveling almost every week, and it's becoming harder for me to manage everything. My health is being affected, and my relationship with my kids hasn't been as strong as it should be lately. I'm short with them because I'm stressed about carrying so much. It's the right time for me to take a step back.

I know that I'll never reach this level in my career again (SVP level), and that I'm blowing up my career by walking away. But this job has knocked the love of my profession right out of me. I'm prepared to never get back to this level, and I'm OK with it.

I'm required to give a couple months' notice, and my comp could be clawed back if I don't. I'm planning to time this the right way so that I'm able to be home for the summer with the kids. It's pretty scary to jump without a real plan, but we'll be fine financially. I need to get my mental and physical health back before I start something new.

Thank you for all of your support over the past few years. If you're interested, I'll keep you all posted!

TL;DR - I'm planning to walk away from my awful job sooner than later. I'm excited and scared.

[traveltheworld]

I went for my interview for that in house position. It was weird. The GC talked a lot about the company and the legal department. But given that I'm their external counsel, I already know most of this. He didn't really ask me questions, nor were there a lot of opportunities for me to talk, so I did what I can, but don't think it went particularly well.

Oh well.

[tas1883]

Finally had DD's fall PTC last Thursday. I was his last conference so we spent about 45 minutes together. She has a slight behaviorally problems as she hides her face in her lap during carpet time. She also doesn't know most her letters or sounds but is in the highest reading group. He also has to keep correcting her book holding (she is holding upside down like he is) so I had to explain how we have this game out of her reading letters and me reading books upside down as a fun silly change up. I suggested he asks her to hold it correctly instead of assuming she doesn't know how. I did get the go ahead to do different homework other than tracing her name each week as homework isn't supposed to be a battle. I left the conference more confused than anything and have been totally overanalyzing it.

librarychica, crock pot dinners twice a week make such a difference in how our evenings run.

[twinmomma]

My kids got into the kindergarten in the part of town we wanted! Guys, we're literally going to save close to $500 per month now that we got in here! Which means we can save up for a bigger house in that neighborhood even faster. I'm having all the feels about how well this is working out, plus my kids are old enough to be in kindergarten. Excuse me while I go blubber away in my cube...

[Deleted]

Feb 2, 2017 13:53:20 GMT -5 traveltheworld said:

I went for my interview for that in house position. It was weird. The GC talked a lot about the company and the legal department. But given that I'm their external counsel, I already know most of this. He didn't really ask me questions, nor were there a lot of opportunities for me to talk, so I did what I can, but don't think it went particularly well.

Oh well.

Sometimes when they talk the whole time it means it went well because they don't have a lot of questions for you.  I have been in some of those and then got hired and they only asked me maybe 5 questions. 

[CoverGirl82]

mae0111, good luck! It sounds like you've really thought it through and it's the right decision to leave. Separating from employment at the beginning of the summer also sounds like a good plan. I'm sure you will stay busy, which will help with the transition. Keep us posted!

[helenahhandbasket]

Wow! That's awesome and scary at the same time mae0111. Let us know how it goes

[somebabiesmom]

Feb 2, 2017 14:10:28 GMT -5 @clarypax said:

Feb 2, 2017 13:53:20 GMT -5 traveltheworld said:

I went for my interview for that in house position. It was weird. The GC talked a lot about the company and the legal department. But given that I'm their external counsel, I already know most of this. He didn't really ask me questions, nor were there a lot of opportunities for me to talk, so I did what I can, but don't think it went particularly well.

Oh well.

Sometimes when they talk the whole time it means it went well because they don't have a lot of questions for you.  I have been in some of those and then got hired and they only asked me maybe 5 questions. 

+1. I had this happen a couple times where they already knew what I was about and they were feeling me out for my reactions to what they had to say.

[mommyatty]

traveltheworld - sounds like my final interview for the job I have now. Spoiler alert: I got the job, lol.

Went to talk with the firm today. It was a little odd and I don't feel good about it. We had a great conversation. I asked questions he seemed impressed with. I know the firm quite well. But at the end, he said he needed to talk to people in the firm who practice my kind of law to see if I would be additive or duplicative since coming in from an in house job is just a different beast from coming from another firm. So it seems the folks who do my kind of law want me (I think) but the office where I want to work is dubious about the business case. Now I'm monkey-braining wondering if they were just blowing sunshine up my skirt because I'm a client and they don't want to piss me off.

I'm never getting out of my hell hole.

[2chatter]

mae0111 - I'm always amazed how some of the women who are very very high in our company stepped out for a few years for various reasons. Don't discount yourself so heavily! Congrats on deciding and putting plans into motion.

mommyatty - they are idiots if they think wasting your time is sunshine. Is there any opportunity to cross paths with any of the decision makers for a "casual ad hoc" convo about the value you bring?