Hi! I hope it's alright if I pop back in. I posted some here when dd was first born. I'm not on this site much so I forget to check in, but I could really use some advice from fellow moms with babies the same age if that's ok.
So I have a 4 year old-but you'd think I'd never done this baby thing before the way things are going. Ever since I went back to work (just before she hit 4 months), my baby's sleep has been awful. She's almost 7 months now. We are up every 1-2 hours, occasionally she'll make it to 3 hours, every single night. Every night for 3 months! We tried CIO one night about 3 weeks ago, and she threw up (it wasn't even that long). After that she got a bad cold where she'd cough until throwing up, so sleep training was a bad idea.
She still has the sniffles, but it's every night of this waking up every 1-2 hours. We both work full time, we have another kid, we are so exhausted that everything's turning into a fight. I have a headache all the time. Oh and at the 1am wake up she becomes impossible to put down. It takes at least an hour. Her mattress is elevated, we use the nose freida and Vicks, have a humidifier-there's not much else to do for this never-ending cold.
Any advice for a totally exhausted mom? With her being sick and since she has reflux, it seems like cio may not be great for her, but I'm willing to listen to all ideas! Thank you!
Post by Susan0utLoud on Feb 16, 2017 22:30:57 GMT -5
When you say CIO, did you just put her down and not go back in?
I'm a fan of Ferber. I personally wouldn't let sniffles stop me from starting it, but a full blown cold, is wait. Is she on anything for the reflux? I always recommend reading the book, or at least the pertinent chapters, before starting. Having a solid bed time routine that you consistently follow, every night, no matter what, made a huge difference for us with our first. The routine has changed over time, but we still have one with our 2.5 year old. We had a terrible sleeper in our first and Ferber worked brilliantly and quickly for us.
I'm sorry you're dealing with this. Being exhausted is torture.
I did the version where you go in after certain amounts of time. I followed the times it suggests. And we definitely have a routine. I think the biggest problem is she just won't let us lay her down drowsy, she has to be fully asleep. And I know that's not good. I think if I could just figure out how to get her to go to sleep on her own more, we'd be fine.
I did the version where you go in after certain amounts of time. I followed the times it suggests. And we definitely have a routine. I think the biggest problem is she just won't let us lay her down drowsy, she has to be fully asleep. And I know that's not good. I think if I could just figure out how to get her to go to sleep on her own more, we'd be fine.
No advice really other than what's already been said. Could you try tuckering her out in a jumper before naps so she gets the drowsy thing at naps first? (How are naps btw?)
Hello! J16's resident shitty sleeper over here lol. First off, big hugs. H and I both work full time and have a 3 yr old. At his worst, b was up every 1-2 hours for MONTHS. Since we both work FT, I had a CTJ talk with H about MOTN stuff. I would nurse B, and then H would take over putting him back to sleep because he doesn't fall asleep nursing. Maybe you and H can work something out like that so it's not always you?
B also has reflux, as well as some neck/shoulder issues so I get not want to CIO because of reflux. There are a few other ways to sleep Train, since that seems to be what you may need.
Look these up and see if anything helps: Precious Little Sleep Sleep Lady Shuffle Happiest Baby on the Block Health Sleep Habits
For us, putting B down early helps a ton. He has to be in his crib asleep by 7:10 The LATEST. otherwise I'm screwed.
Again, big hugs. This shit sucks, but you'll find something that helps. It might not be immediate, but something will click.
FWIW B is usually sleeping 7p-6a with 1-2 wake ups (usually only one). Every now and then we have a few horrible nights. There were a solid 3-4 months where I thought I was going to lose my shit and run away forever. I get it.
Thanks for the tips and commiseration. It is awful what sleep deprivation night after night does to a person.
Her naps are not great. They are pretty good on weekends actually, but she goes different places on different days during the week, so that doesn't help. She definitely lacks consistency, so I'm sure that's part of the problem.
I did finally make a deal w dh that I'll take wake ups before 2 am, but he's got to take wake ups after then. It made a world of difference just to finally sleep 3.5 consecutive hours last night. He helped before, but I definitely took the brunt of the wake ups.
Thanks for the sleep training recs. Someone else mentioned precious little sleep to me just the other day so I think I'll check that out first.
It's hard bc I know it won't last forever, but I'm just not the person I want to be at work or the Mom/wife I want to be at home because I feel like I'm just trying to survive.
Post by rungirlrun on Feb 17, 2017 23:41:05 GMT -5
I'm sorry you're going through this. Lots of good advice has already been given. I too am/was a member of the shitty sleeper club. E (who also has reflux and is now 6.5 months) was up every 1-2 hours until almost 5.5 months. What helped a ton was me stop nursing him to sleep. He's always put down awake. First few nights of that sucked (we did a lot of checkins), but now, he goes down with barely a fuss. And he's in his crib by 7. And we used Ferber to cut back on MOTN feedings. I kept increasing the time between feeds. Now he's down to 1-2 wake ups a night.
Sleep was bad, very bad for us for a long time. I wanted to cry every day (I'm a SAHM but also have a 3 year old so life was rough). I dreaded going to bed bc I knew it was going to be a disaster. And I dreaded waking up because I knew I couldn't be a good mom to my older one bc I was so tired. So I totally get it. One thing that's really hard is when he has good nap days, his night sleep is better. But I have another kid so I can't live life around the baby's naps. So I just try to get in as many good nap days as possible. Hard, but I can sometimes work our plans around bit to make sure he gets at least 1 crib nap a day.
Thanks -we ended up taking her in today for a couple reasons and it turns out she has a sinus infection-poor girl. I feel kind of like a jerk for not knowing that sooner, but we were just there a week and a half ago for a well visit and it was just a cold then. Hopefully her antibiotics will clear this up and then we'll see if her sleep gets any better. I did read up a lot on some of the sleep training sites mentioned, so once she's better I think we'll pick one and really stick to it if she's still sleeping this poorly.
Hope she feels better soon! With both of my girls MOTN wake ups with not going back to sleep after eating usually mean infections (ear or sinus). Hope once that's gone she can start sleeping better!
We finally had one decent night of sleep and her stuffy nose is really clearing up. Thanks for the support. It's so nice to talk with others who've recently been through the same thing. Fingers crossed it keeps getting better!
Hi, I'm from the august BMB, but I had a sleeper just like you. We also have a 2 year old, and since sleep training never worked for her I was pretty reluctant to try again with DD2.
We ended up doing Ferber only at bedtime so she could learn to fall asleep. I had been nursing her until she was passed out before that. The CIO wasn't nearly as bad as I expected, just a few nights. Also, early bedtime here, she is exhausted by about 6:30.
When she learned to put herself to sleep it was a total game changer. I had been feeding her basically every 45 minutes and sleeping with her attached to my boob the second half of the night when I was so tired I couldn't take it anymore. Now I still feed her every 3-4 hours at night, BUT it takes 10 minutes, I put her down awake, and she rolls over and goes to sleep. (I spent HOURS bouncing DD1 to sleep in the middle of the night, so I can't tell you what a relief this is.)
I hope when she's healthy again, she'll surprise you and some form of sleep training will work!
Thanks- my poor baby is sick again. She got a stomach bug and the antibiotics from the sinus infection apparently have caused her reflux to go crazy. She got over the tummy bug Sunday but is throwing up big amounts a couple times a day-sometimes in her sleep, so we definitely won't be considering sleep training until she's healthy. She's got a cough tonight too so I'm guessing she may have another virus. My son has had the stomach bug 3 times this year-it is so bad this year.
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