How did you return to the world with twins?

[dukegirlsc]

Hi ladies, I'm just wondering how you returned to the land of the living after having your twins. We have basically been holed up at home getting them on a three hour schedule not doing anything except doctor appointments and I'm not sure how to really fit anything else in. Also it's cold and flu season and I really don't want a bunch of people around my babies. My husband and I were discussing Easter today which we normally host the family at our home and I'm not really sure how to add other people or events or anything into our lives at this point, I feel overwhelmed just thinking of it. Any advice?

[requiressnacks]

Hi dukegirlsc.....I don't have a ton of advice, but the TL:DR is just do it. And be organized.

I had mine in early November so we had Thanksgiving and Christmas to deal with. I even hosted Christmas Day. It just takes a lot of planning and the ability to be flexible. The only thing I focused on during holiday celebrations was to make sure that we fed every 3 hours. Also, mine would fall asleep in our arms eventually.

Outside of holidays, I started getting out first to places like Target or to the mall, which had a family lounge. Mine were on a 3 hour schedule so I would get all my crap together when they were napping, load the car and then when they woke up I would feed them and immediately get them in car seats. I tried to do all my errands before the next feeding. Luckily mine would nap in car seats as we strolled around the store.

Good luck!

[jd]

Just do it! There is nothing that will prepare you for the inevitable meltdown that will happen sooner or later. Try to go with someone the first few times (or have someone at home with you if you're hosting), and thereafter, just be prepared and organized, like requiressnacks suggested. Low expectations were key in the early days. Even now, we just make sure they've fed and slept and then we head out and hope for the best. You will be homebound forever if you wait until it's "risk-free" to take multiples out consistently! You're going to be very impressed with yourself when you get the hang of doing major solo outings .

[callmeKD]

Mine are 8 weeks tomorrow (what?!) and we've just started venturing out. I did a solo trip to my work on Thu to visit and today we ran errands. It takes me much longer to get out of the house then I anticipate it will. And by the time I get home, I'm exhausted.

[schmella]

One of our first big trips was actually to IKEA? Surprisingly kid friendly, the woman who greeted us at the door was very quick to inform me where I could find a family bathroom, nursing room, and bottle warmers. They had some very comfy "living room-like" set ups in their restaurant. We went during the week, so it was not at all crowded and it's still a favorite shopping trip for the kids (super cheap lunch date!)
My first solo "outing" was to visit a family friend's home where there were 4 very kid friendly adults waiting to meet us.
Bottom line, set yourself up for success and keep your expectations low. Our earliest trips were very short, (always under an hour) and felt pointless (I was also pumping so we had like a 2hr window, max) but it got easier to get it the door every time. It is exhausting and not fun at first.
As for holidays, we hit Thanksgiving and Christmas before the 3m mark. We hosted. And by hosted I mean we set up a folding table in our partially finished kitchen and made the turkey in an oven installed days before the holiday. Our family brought ALL the sides. That way I could pump, the kids could sleep, we weren't in a crazy rush. We hosted (potluck style) every holiday their first year. It was just so much easier (but my family doesn't stress about a clean house or perfect table).

[schmella]

As for not being able to fit anything else in... can I just give you permission NOT to? I mean seriously, if you want to get out then GO. But you do not have to get out just because your SIL just has to get out of the house everyday, or because your friends with kids are taking them to some sort of class at 8 weeks. With preemies born end of October in the Midwest, no one expected me to drag them out in the snow and I am so so grateful for that. Enjoy your babies and that lovely newborn cocoon if that's what's working for you.

[dke2010]

At first, I always took someone with me. I also have a 4 yr old so I really needed the extra hands. I made sure I was only gone for an hour or two and back home for the next feeding. Now I often go out with all 3 by myself.
If you don't feel comfortable hosting Easter this year, ask if someone else wants to or go out to a restaurant.

[richzep]

I agree. It's just a matter of doing it. The more you do it, the more confident you feel. I took the twins out around a month old (middle of summer). I didn't do it much in the beginning because by the time I got my act together, it would be time to feed again or change or nap or something. I also had a 1.5 year old who would tantrum at the worst times. So getting out of the house wasn't easy. I started doing it more around 3 months when they could stay up a bit longer and didn't need to be fed so often. At 5 months, it became a consistent thing. We'd go out every day.
Just work yourself up to that point and be kind to yourself. There will be meltdowns and diaper blowouts. It's ok. Have low expectations and just go with the flow.
Oh and baby wearing. Wear the fussier one.

[jd]

Mar 26, 2017 16:19:29 GMT -5 richzep said:

I agree. It's just a matter of doing it. The more you do it, the more confident you feel. I took the twins out around a month old (middle of summer). I didn't do it much in the beginning because by the time I got my act together, it would be time to feed again or change or nap or something. I also had a 1.5 year old who would tantrum at the worst times. So getting out of the house wasn't easy. I started doing it more around 3 months when they could stay up a bit longer and didn't need to be fed so often. At 5 months, it became a consistent thing. We'd go out every day.
Just work yourself up to that point and be kind to yourself. There will be meltdowns and diaper blowouts. It's ok. Have low expectations and just go with the flow.
Oh and baby wearing. Wear the fussier one.

This is what we do, and it's always funny when people assume I have triplets when I carry one and push the other in the double stroller. I actually had one person ask, "how many kids have you got there?!"