maggie6424 is it possible for you to hire a cleaner, even just for a couple weeks. My h is your h and everytime I threaten to hire a cleaner he steps up (because he doesn't want to pay for one). The other option is maybe to call a friend? I've cleaned many houses for friends who have given birth, needed a break etc
Me: 29 DH: 35 NTNP since May 2013 charting since June 2014 dx: Graves disease (radioactive iodine), Crohns disease (abdominal surgeries) MMC October 2015 (9 weeks) Severe MFI diagnosis July 2015
Post by starsandshamrocks123 on Jun 26, 2017 7:39:16 GMT -5
Ugh I feel like venting about DH. I'm lucky that he does the laundry and does the major stuff for the toddler (dress, bathe, feed) he just seems so pissed off like all the time. Last weekend he admitted he was just sad for no reason and I figured he'd move on... but he was just really pissy all weekend again and it's starting to get old. This situation is a big adjustment for all of us and I'm trying to just power through it... I find myself asking him if I can do anything but it doesn't work both ways-- he doesn't seem to ask me how I'm doing or what I need. I really don't feel like fighting over it at this point right now. I don't think it's the right time. I just know he's going to say he does everything and I do nothing... but I'm seriously just trying to focus on the newborn. But on the other hand he's so insistent about this pumping and he never once has said anything encouraging like "yeah I know it's not ideal but thank you" which would go a long way. Or when he went away overnight on his business trip he never once said wow that must have sucked for you. It was all about how exhausted he was from the ordeal. It always seems to be like an under appreciated thing with us when neither feels appreciated by the other
I don't want to let it fester but I also cannot handle an argument right now. Boo.
Post by teachermomtobe on Jun 26, 2017 8:27:32 GMT -5
starsandshamrocks123, sorry your DH is acting that way and that both of you are feeling unappreciated. Not baby related but DH and I go through that with work stuff sometimes, each feeling like we are more stressed/tired/overwhelmed/etc than the other one simply because we don't *really* get what it's like to do the other person's job and in the moment it's hard to believe someone is as tired/stressed/overwhelmed as you are.
I was incommunicado the past few days as we thought it might be go-time. No baby yet, though. I had contractions regularly and getting closer together and stronger for about 12 hours overnight Friday into Saturday morning. Then they stopped. We tried yoga ball and nipple stimulation and I got a handful of strong ones, but then nothing. So we slept and hoped it would pick up overnight Saturday. No luck. Spent yesterday doing anything but thinking about it and nothing beyond a few random small contractions and some cramps.
I talked to the midwife just to make sure she saw no reason for concern and apparently it's normal for labor to start slowly like this. Their only concern was for my psychological health. Which was definitely shot at one point yesterday when I cried about it with H. It's not that I'm past due (40+5 today) or really even that it started and stopped, but more that we're just getting closer to needing an induction and I really want to avoid one.
So today I have an acupuncture appointment at noon (recommended by the MW and doula) to see if that will get things moving. Still doing all the other things too (squats, lunges, yoga ball, etc). This baby is just stubborn!
I keep telling myself in just over a week max I'll have a baby no matter what, but it's definitely getting tough to relax mentally.
I was wondering about you marshian. I have had acupuncture when at 40+ weeks with my first and third pregnancies and both times I had the baby within 24 hours. I hope it works for you. Hang in there!
starsandshamrocks123, sorry your DH is acting that way and that both of you are feeling unappreciated. Not baby related but DH and I go through that with work stuff sometimes, each feeling like we are more stressed/tired/overwhelmed/etc than the other one simply because we don't *really* get what it's like to do the other person's job and in the moment it's hard to believe someone is as tired/stressed/overwhelmed as you are.
It's exactly this.
I just decided to ask him for encouragement... instead of being argumentative. So maybe he will get it. Ugh
Post by brandiewine11 on Jun 26, 2017 13:28:39 GMT -5
marshian I totally understand that. Something very similar happened with my first. Eventually I did cervidil to get things going but I refused pitocin until we tried that and worked so I never needed pit or a long induction process. Keep at it. Baby will come!!
sdlaura - I hope it works that well for me too! Thank you for sharing that!
bewise - I'll get those at my 41-week appointment on Wednesday unless labor starts for real before then. That's part of what's causing my anxiety because if they don't like the results of either it's straight to an induction. Hope yours go well!
Post by teachermomtobe on Jun 26, 2017 14:22:11 GMT -5
marshian, I know you don't want an induction but I just wanted to say I had far from a good induction experience (2 tries, multiple days, etc) but once labor actually started it went quickly and smoothly and I would do it again a hundred times over to get my DD here.
Post by eucalyptus on Jun 26, 2017 14:49:38 GMT -5
marshian, Hang in there! I second what teachermomtobe said. I also had an induction under circumstances that were far from ideal, and it still got me a baby! I hope things start on their own for you and go smoothly.
teachermomtobe & eucalyptus - I hope you don't think I was being judgy or weird about inductions! I just know there's a higher chance of a c-section with one so trying to avoid. Whichever way baby gets here, I'll take!
teachermomtobe & eucalyptus - I hope you don't think I was being judgy or weird about inductions! I just know there's a higher chance of a c-section with one so trying to avoid. Whichever way baby gets here, I'll take!
Not at all. I seriously didn't want one either, for exactly the same reason, so I totally hear you. Just wanted to let you know that it wasn't as horrible as I feared. I still had a pain medication free vaginal birth, despite all odds being against that.
Post by applemuffins on Jun 26, 2017 15:53:54 GMT -5
Also induced without a c-section. It's likely your induction would work better and faster than mine too since you are further along. The unknown is scary, but I bet even with an induction, you can avoid a c section.
teachermomtobe & eucalyptus - I hope you don't think I was being judgy or weird about inductions! I just know there's a higher chance of a c-section with one so trying to avoid. Whichever way baby gets here, I'll take!
No I was absolutely the same way. I didn't want an induction because of increased chance of c-section but I was able to avoid one.
eucalyptus, applemuffins, teachermomtobe - Thank you for reminding me of your stories here (because I can't remember how everyone's went down). Makes me feel much better! And yes, definite fear of the unknown here!
i hope your baby comes soon, marshian! I was afraid of induction too but mine ended up going well. Also a lot of babies like to come the night before their scheduled induction, or so I've heard. Thinking of you!!
marshian you're so close!! At least your body is doing something! If you end up having to be induced I bet things will move along quickly. I was induced with DD at 41 weeks and narrowly avoided a c/s....but my body wasn't doing a damn thing on its own prior to induction. Good luck!!
Me: 29 DH: 35 NTNP since May 2013 charting since June 2014 dx: Graves disease (radioactive iodine), Crohns disease (abdominal surgeries) MMC October 2015 (9 weeks) Severe MFI diagnosis July 2015
marshian I don't have any experience with inductions to share but I will still have my fingers crossed that you go into labor on your own and if not that you have a smooth induction. I know you can't wait to see that baby!
Post by maggie6424 on Jun 26, 2017 22:43:23 GMT -5
mreve I had the laundry caught up. 4 days of laundry for three people including two small kids and then my laundry from the hospital filled a basket. The bathroom was mostly clean, too. I also hate coming home to a disaster. ihatepizza no. Because of where we live and the size/state of our teeny house its not possible. All they would be able to do is vacuum, start one load of laundry, and handwash dishes. Also, no friends within 3 hours. Both would have been done if we were still in Denver though! I'd kill for a cleaner right now.
Meagan
31 dx with PCOS 2010
DS1 12-29-11 Matthew
BFP 10/19/13 missed mc at 5 weeks discovered at 8 weeks. D&C 11/18/13
BFP 2/16/14 EDD 10/31/14
DS2 11-4-14 Alex
Post by maggie6424 on Jun 26, 2017 22:52:02 GMT -5
starsandshamrocks123 that would upset me, too. I understand your not wanting to fight though. They're teeny for such a short time, and it's not something you can get back. It sounds like he's having a hard time adjusting to not being a priority. Hopefully he'll snap out of it soon. marshian it is so hard at the end. Not wanting to be induced is very valid. Hugs mama.
Meagan
31 dx with PCOS 2010
DS1 12-29-11 Matthew
BFP 10/19/13 missed mc at 5 weeks discovered at 8 weeks. D&C 11/18/13
BFP 2/16/14 EDD 10/31/14
DS2 11-4-14 Alex
It's now 2:18 am and I've logged one hour of sleep. I have gas, so I'm assuming whatever I ate is causing it for him too. H keeps asking if I want him to hold L, but I don't because he'll fall asleep in three seconds with him in our bed. He does this fussing thing where he bitches for five or so seconds, stops for a few seconds up to a minute then fusses again. I need the damn full size swing, swaddle me, and a room with nobody else in it. Oh and a sleeping baby.
Meagan
31 dx with PCOS 2010
DS1 12-29-11 Matthew
BFP 10/19/13 missed mc at 5 weeks discovered at 8 weeks. D&C 11/18/13
BFP 2/16/14 EDD 10/31/14
DS2 11-4-14 Alex
I was also induced but didn't share my story because it was a "failed induction", i.e. Ended in c-section.
I will say, even with it being a c-section, healing was not bad at all and at the end of the day I was ok with it(even though I really wanted a med free, vaginal birth) because we had a healthy happy baby to bring home. Life doesn't always go as planned and that's something to remember too! Be flexible and just keep your eye on the prize.
I was induced 5 years ago with my DD. This time my stubborn DS stayed breech so I had an uneventful scheduled c/s. I never posted a birth story because there wasn't much to it. Ditto what cateyes said...my recovery has been wonderful. Sometimes these babies just have their own plans and we have to go with it!
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