Dinner Battle

[northernlghts]

We've been trying to get LO to eat dinner before bed and for the most part, she will eat something. But then we have nights like tonight where she cries hysterically thru most of the meal and ends up wearing half of it. I don't know what I'm doing wrong. She was rubbing her eyes like crazy like she was tired but when I stopped trying to spoon feed her and give her yogurt puffs or cereal (or tomatoes in tonight's case) she stopped and ate. I don't want to force feed her but at the same time, I don't think she's fighting me because she's not hungry because she will eat if I put something else in front of her. Should I be giving her more finger foods? Do I just let her play with the food and see if she feeds it to herself? As far as I know she doesn't fight my mom and she's usually feed by the time I get home at night (5:30) so maybe I'm trying to feed her too late? The minute we stopped, picked her up and put her in the tub (she was that messy), she was smiling and giggling and splashing in the tub like she got her way, so I think she may just be stubborn. But do battles of will start this early?  Daycare hasn't mentioned to me that she fights them with the purees I send her so I'm not entirely convinced she's outgrown purees yet.

I've been feeding her stuff I know she likes but trying to mix it with pasta just to make her fuller. She could just be showing her preference and deciding she doesn't feel like whatever I am serving her on a night. I've also tried giving her a couple bites and if she doesn't eat it, offer her something else. Do other people do this?  She liked pastina the first night I give it to her so I thought she really liked it/didn't mind the texture.  The first couple nights I did this, she ending up sleeping through the night and the nights my mom just gave her purees, she woke up. This could just be a coincidence or it could be what kept her sleeping 12 hrs straight. I'm interested to see how things go tonight. 

I know I'm just rambling at this point but I'm hoping someone has some experience and can offer up some suggestions. 

[ntdane]

You may just have an early dinner, early to bed preference, especially if there are eye rubs. I would either try to feed LO earlier if possible or just do a little bit before putting them to bed. Good luck!

[meggsm]

We totally had this happen tonight. Dinner was late and bedtime was late and it took an hour to put her down tonight when notmally it takes like 20 minutes

Keep trying foods but maybe when she's more awake and in a good mood. Also they go through phases of likes and dislikes like we do. It can take a while for them to like a food.

[bsouls]

I am confused as to what you're feeding her. Are you feeding her purees mixed with something else to make her fuller?

If you're not already, then I would give her finger foods - especially at dinner time. If she will be happy just sitting there with you guys - especially if she will eat the puffs.

Have you tried toast? Lil' T loves frozen waffles - no one better fuck with her waffle. She also likes grilled cheese squares. And, now we pretty much have to let her try what we're eating, because if we try to give her something different she freaks out when she sees that she's not eating what we are - even though she was happily enjoying her food before our plates hit the table.

[northernlghts]

Sorry bsouls, didn't mean to confuse you. I was feeding her straight purees and then I decided to try and integrate something else into dinner. I tried pastina Saturday, mixed with something I know she likes and she ate it up. So tonight, I tried again and she was hysterical. But when I stopped and offered her yogurt puffs, she stopped crying and started to feed herself but pasta & sweet potatoes are hard to feed yourself by hand. But since no one has mentioned she fights being spoon fed any other time, I didn't think it was an issue of her outgrowing them. I'm not sure if it was an issue of being tired, expressing a preference over what she wanted for dinner or what. She also happened to sleep thru the night for the first time ever on Saturday.  I'm not doing it specifically to keep her fuller but it was just a thought that perhaps giving her more, especially foods like pasta that would keep anyone fuller for longer, it may help her sleep longer. 

Haven't tried toast but she was meh about grilled cheese. I feed her first when I get home and we eat after she goes to bed around 6-6:30.

[babycaps]

For a while, M did not accept any food that came from a spoon and had to strictly self-feed. I would give him finger foods and then I could sneak in spoonfuls of yogurt between his bites. But his will to self-feed was STRONG! There were nights where he would cry if he saw the spoon. it was a phase and now we do a combo of self-feeding and assisted since I give him some yogurt with banana every night.
We also moved up dinner to a full hour before bedtime. So dinner is a 5:30pm and we start PJs at 6:30ish. If it's bath night, bath is at 6:15 then bed. We were doing dinner at 5:45-6pm and it was a battle and just way too late for a too tired kid.

[bsouls]

I would try finger foods then, because maybe she is OK with purees earlier but not later in the day - plus, we need to start moving away from purees (I have no idea why my boyfriend bought five jars on Sunday).

Plain toast was the first thing that she was actually interested in that was a finger food. Now I am amazed at the stuff she can manage - she ate homemade pizza on Monday. I was amazed that she managed the crust. She ate half an english muffin with soy butter on it at lunch. She also loved meat loaf, chili and had a chicken finger today (we had chicken finger salads).

Maybe you could save her some of your dinner and give it to her the next night? When we have tacos, I put refried beans on mums mums with shredded cheese on top. She also liked some of the tortilla and fake meat.

And, we so don't have this shit down. It is very stressful trying to figure out what to feed her and trying to ensure that she is getting more than just carbohydrates. She only has two bottom teeth and I keep trying to tell her that eating will be easier if she gives me her two top teeth.

[fish8412]

Keep trying a variety of foods. It may take 1 or 10 tries for her to like a certain food. Since she only has 2 teeth try giving her meatballs but take off the skin. The insides are soft.

It's normal for babies to play with food. I agree that the mess can be a pain, but it's good/fun for them to explore textures.

My LO usually has 1 meal that she just eats so so but she makes up for it with the other 2 meals. If your LO eats a good breakfast and lunch then I wouldn't worry too much about dinner. Like others have said, try feeding her an earlier dinner since her drowsiness seems to affect her eating dinner. Does your LO like oatmeal/cereal? That is our go to if LO is being super picky. We mix in fruit. Good luck!!

[northernlghts]

Thank ladies. And fish8412 yes, she likes oatmeal. Breakfast is generally either oatmeal with fruit, yogurt with fruit or just fruit.

[jjsmom80]

i agree with the finger foods. Admittedly JJ has always been a great eater but the times when he has decided to be picky he was always brought back around with something he could feed himself.

[bandteacher]

Sounds like she doesn't want purees right now. We feed the twins strictly finger foods because they decided to go on a spoon strike a couple months ago.

[pinecone21]

Mine will only eat from a spoon if she also has finger food in front of her. It's amazing what can be finger food. If I don't have anything else, I microwave a handful of frozen peas. I've also steamed veggies and cut them into bite size pieces, like broccoli, zucchini, carrots, beans, sweet potatoes... I also cut up raw fruit, like grapes, blueberries, strawberries. Most meat except for steak can also be cut into finger food. She will even eat rice as finger food.

[bandteacher]

Feb 20, 2015 23:33:41 GMT -5 pinecone21 said:

Mine will only eat from a spoon if she also has finger food in front of her. It's amazing what can be finger food. If I don't have anything else, I microwave a handful of frozen peas. I've also steamed veggies and cut them into bite size pieces, like broccoli, zucchini, carrots, beans, sweet potatoes... I also cut up raw fruit, like grapes, blueberries, strawberries. Most meat except for steak can also be cut into finger food. She will even eat rice as finger food.

Also canned beans and vegetables, fruit cups, crackers, canned tuna and chicken, bread...

[northernlghts]

Here was tonight's attempt at dinner and trying to feed herself. I can't get her to eat meat so I tried mixing squash with it. 

[sanibel21]

Feb 21, 2015 18:14:06 GMT -5 northernlghts said:

Here was tonight's attempt at dinner and trying to feed herself. I can't get her to eat meat so I tried mixing squash with it. 

O. M. G. LOL. That is priceless.

[fishbulb]

Here's my attempt at letting him spoon feed himself sweet potato puree. Believe it or not this is progress.

[Deleted]

Honestly sounds like you need an earlier dinner. If they are to tired they just wont eat- then they wont sleep because they are hungry etc.

Also the spoon strike is real. Thats how Ethan got off the puree's. He now (literally) eats what we are eating.

[lakecountrygal]

DS also went in spoon strike and will now only eat finger foods. It's made life messier for me but he's eating so I can't really complain. We got rid of all our purées because he was refusing to eat them.

[northernlghts]

During the week I can't feed her any earlier than 5:30. I pick her up at 5 and we drive straight home and I put her straight into her highchair to eat. If she's home with my mom, she gets dinner at 5 so tonight that's what I tried and I didn't have much better luck. She had woken up from a late nap at 4. I tried giving her what I was feeding her by spoon by placing it on the tray for her to feel and feed herself. She just played with it and kind of got some in her mouth which is better than nothing but we still had screaming and crying. The minute I stop, she's happy and smiling and giggling again.

I think I may take a break for the next two days and have my mom try again Wednesday night when she has her. I'm tired of fighting, its frustrating for both of us and I don't want to turn her off food completely. She has me feeling like a failure at this point, like I did something wrong because she won't eat certain things.  I asked my mom and she's not like this with her. I'm trying to get her to try new things like her fruits and veggies with pasta or rice and shes just not having it. I'm honestly jealous of those of you who's kids are good dinner eaters at this age. Breakfast and lunch aren't issues so its not all bad.

[ntdane]

northernlghts don't feel like a failure! Babies are all so different and they behave very differently with other people. As they get older you will find they are often at their worst for mom and dad. I think it's smart to take a break and then try again. It can take 10+ times of offering something for them to eat something so just keep trying!

[Deleted]

Feb 22, 2015 21:47:52 GMT -5 ntdane said:

northernlghts don't feel like a failure! Babies are all so different and they behave very differently with other people. As they get older you will find they are often at their worst for mom and dad. I think it's smart to take a break and then try again. It can take 10+ times of offering something for them to eat something so just keep trying!

James is absolutely awful for Mh and I with food. Anyone else? He eats everything.

Us? It's a uphill battle. The night I took a video of Ethan eating a bowl of steak (refusing fruit) James ate 2oz of bread, the croutons off my salad, some of my salad and refused his grilled cheese but ate all the fruit.

This is why I have skeletor child and future prop.