Monday Morning Blues... HELP!!

[runnergirl812]

So I just returned from a glorious week in Costa Rica with BF.

No kids, lots of sun, no snow, little stress, no email, no phone except via WiFi/Facetime.

We got back on Friday and ever since waking up on Saturday, I've felt the anxiety creep back in. I just got back to work today. Open up my email to an inbox full of messages and requests, including one from my boss who wants to meet to discuss performance evals. I'm BEHIND on two projects, and... BAM. Panic attack.

I'm sitting here about to cry and I can't get out of this loop. I feel like I'm about to throw up and my stomach hasn't been right all morning (TMI warning: I think I went to the bathroom 4x before I showered this morning). GAAAAAh..... this is bad. I feel like it's my job. But I LOVE my job. I get along with my coworkers. I know I'm capable. But I'm stuck. Not motivated. Not wanting to be here. I just want to go back to sleep and run away from the stress and heart racing feelings.

Any suggestions? advice? Damn psychiatric appointment isn't until Wednesday. It seems like an eternity from now.

[blush]

I wish I knew some trick to make things better quickly but I am not very good at it. It is so hard to come from complete relaxation to regular life, especially when regular life is stressful.

I am not sure how much this would help but when I was feeling that way at work I would get a small treat to start, like a specialty hot chocolate. I would drink it slowly and just breathe for a few minutes. I would work as hard as I could but take a few minutes to breathe deeply and relax every so often. I would honestly get the most important things started and not worry about the rest. Think of one thing at a time as much as possible. I found when I looked at everything together it could make it seem so much worse. I am sure you know all that so I hope someone can offer some different ideas.

I mainly wanted to respond to say I am sorry you are having such a rough day and that I hope you are feeling better very soon.

[runnergirl812]

Thanks, blush. Your words help.

I need medication. I was thinking all last week, "I don't need meds. I'm okay." But today just proves it. Reactions like I had this morning (and I'm still feeling the effects and anxiety but not as high) are not a normal reaction to emails and work stress, especially for a job I used to love. I called a friend and she talked me off the ledge. I was seriously contemplating how to quit my job and find another. I've only been in my position for 2 years - I really need to stay put for at least another year or two. Plus it pays really well.

I have some water and ginger candy. My stomach is still upset, but I'm managing. Mondays suck!!

Edit: Words and I fail at them today.

[blush]

I am glad you found someone to talk to and I am glad you are ok. Monday's are bad. I also need to go back to medication. I am just waiting for my appointment later this week.

[icequeen]

I'm sorry you feel so trapped and debilitated with your anxiety. My suggestion would be to go talk to your boss and figure out a game plan for you to get back on track. I'm sure he/she knows that you were gone and have to catch up on a lot of things, and it will good if you go in and take the first initiative to show him/her that you want to stay on task. Sitting in your office worrying and panicking will only belabor your projects. Can you reach out to your coworkers for some extra support? If there is any kind of "outsourcing" you can do I would maximize it. Also set up a list of priorities of projects, like what needs to be done, how much time will be required to complete it, and block off a time on your calendar to do it.

I hope this helps. I'm sorry again that you are so stressed. I hope Wednesday comes quickly for you!

[Deleted]

I know exactly how you feel, i used to panic when I felt overwhelmed at work. What really helped me was to organize all my projects and tasks on a list and tackle them one by one, maybe you can also run it by your boss so he/she can see what you have on your plate and can help you prioritize.

I hope you feel better, vacations can be so relaxing but sometimes coming home to everything you left behind is tough.

[runnergirl812]

Thanks everyone! I do have a meeting with my boss tomorrow. She's asking where certain projects are, and I really need to be honest with her and come clean on status. I'll have 2 out of 3 ready to go by tomorrow morning. But the third, I'm really behind on and need to produce!!!

Oh well. It is what it is.

I'm trying not to stress. I'm putting in some extra hours tonight while it's quiet.