people are just rude

[twotxmommies]

I have been trying to put myself out there more in other groups on PB but damn! Some of those people are just down right bitchy. I mean you really don’t know each other and def aren't emotionally attached... lighten up. It starts off with an innocent question and ends up in an all-out ugly mess. There is never any of that on our LGBT forums, or at least any of the ones that I have been a part of. Don't get me wrong, I can be a bitch as most or all of us can. I just reserve that for those who know me. This is not a place for that nonsense. Rant over

Sorry, had to vent. I think I might retreat back to this community. thanks for not being ass-hats

[mahler5]

Sorry you had a bad experience. I've noticed that at times too. I totally agree with you. I'm glad this board isn't like this.

I think tone and other things can be lost with only text communication too, which can make the bitchiness sound worse at times.. Or in general can cause miscommunication. I think people aren't careful enough when posting for sure.

Anyway. Glad you ranted. Hope you feel better now!'

[shemarie82]

I feel slightly less intimidated than I did at TD, because we are all kind of noobies here, but it is still overwhelming. I see the way that people are flamed, and while it may be deserved it is like a pile on. I agree, I am glad that it isn't like that here!

[officerofthelaw]

I have noticed that too! I was reading some posts on the bump just under TTC and people would ask a question and people's responses to those questions were so hateful or mean. I love that this board is so supportive and doesn't judge anyone and answers questions appropriately even if they feel like the person should already know the answer.

[shemarie82]

I can handle my fair share of tude, but I think that the "snark" that people are so proud of here can be downright bitchy!

[Stringy]

Mar 10, 2015 10:09:56 GMT -5 twotxmommies said:

I have been trying to put myself out there more in other groups on PB but damn! Some of those people are just down right bitchy. I mean you really don’t know each other and def aren't emotionally attached... lighten up. It starts off with an innocent question and ends up in an all-out ugly mess. There is never any of that on our LGBT forums, or at least any of the ones that I have been a part of. Don't get me wrong, I can be a bitch as most or all of us can. I just reserve that for those who know me. This is not a place for that nonsense. Rant over

Sorry, had to vent. I think I might retreat back to this community. thanks for not being ass-hats

I don't know where or who was snarky or rude to you (and I'm not defending them, internets make people rude sometimes)- but I do want to just say that on some boards people DO really know each other and are emotionally attached and get protective of their friends.  I have friends here on PB and previously on TB that I genuinely care for and some of which I have met in person before.

As someone who does post on 3 or so different boards here - I really recommend reading any kind of pinned post first and lurking a while, because each has their own set of "rules" and norms that they follow. Kind of like here we don't like when people come and refer to the group as "ladies."  Although we don't jump down their throats if they do.  Sorry if you knew all that already,  some individuals are just bitches and it sucks to be them and have all that negative energy.  It is hard/scary to join a new group - I totally feel you on that one.

[wittyandwaiting]

I agree so I just hang out here. I feel like this on other boards:

m.youtube.com/watch?v=4VF06kEKGUk

I know some people have had great experiences with other boards though....

[crazyaunt84]

I've made friends on other boards, but you definitely have to tread lightly when you enter some of the groups. GKU is deliciously snarky, and it is a pretty tight knit group so its more difficult to just jump in - but it's worth the effort.

And we're always here with warm hugs if ya need 'em!

Aaandd...a little humor for your Wednesday.

[mrsnorris]

Snarkiness is NMS, and there are certainly boards where I tread lightly or just lurk because I'm too intimidated to jump in. But I will echo what others have said about reading sticky posts at the top and lurking to get a feel for a board before jumping in. Sometimes there is context that is not immediately apparent. I'm most active on my BMB Aug14 and I genuinely think that the posters there are wonderful and none of them are bitchy IMO. However, back on TB, before I'd started posted on my BMB and was lurking, there were times when things happened that I misunderstood for random bitchiness. Once, someone came onto the board and posted a pretty innocuous story and people, seemingly out of the clear blue sky, jumped all over her and basically told her to get out. I was totally put off until later someone else asked them about it and one of the regs posted a link to a conversations from months back where this poster had said incredibly hurtful things about "science babies" and how people shouldn't be happy when someone conceived via anything other than traditional means because those babies were "not made from love". I could see based on this back story how she got the reception she got. While this is obviously not the case everywhere and I have definitely seen examples of pointless bitchiness, I try to give boards and posters the benefit of the doubt. That said, I'm glad that both this board and my BMB are full of wonderful people who are supportive and kind and that they're both free of random meanness. I think that overall this is true of most boards I've spent much time on. People are really supportive and protective of their friends because they've gotten emotionally invested in one another, but are open to new people who are willing to participate according to the norms of that community.