How do you feel, Friday?

[kh826]

Happy Friday!

How is everyone feeling today?

Fill us in on the ups and downs of your week, and why you are glad it is Friday!

[karlamo]

This week has been rough with R being so sick still. Mamosey brought him back to the Dr. today for the third time this week. He finally got a dx other than virus. He has an ear infection with brocholitis. He was given breathing treatments and meds. I hope he can finally be on the mend. I'm not ussed to seeing him so sad and cranky. He's normally happy and a ball of energy with me trying to keep up with him. I miss that.

In better news, I took a freelance gig every Saturday in April and today I found out they're paying me $20 more an hour than I planned on! This will take the sting out of working Saturdays.

[kh826]

My poor boy has his first cold. We are lucky we made it to 9.5 months without so much as a sniffle, but it still stinks seeing him all stuffed up. He doesn't have a fever and acts mostly fine during the day (aside from a tad snotty - I know, gross), but at night his head and nose fill up with junk when he lays down and he can't sleep. He kept tossing and turning and sniffling last night. It was pitiful. We got him up twice and tried to clean out his little nose with the bulb thing (don't know the official name)...he hated that but it gave some temporary relief. We have a vaporizer going, but that wasn't enough. We might try a decongestant tonight. Poor little bugger. So that has me feeling sad and worried even though I know he is fine and this shall pass.

I am also still just not feeling myself and trying to figure out what my normal is supposed to feel like now. I am generally a happy and positive person, and I don't want to push that side of myself down right now, but I also feel tremendously guilty being even remotely happy right now. Even though everyone tells me that is crazy and I shouldn't.

I think those are all of my feelings for the moment.

I am SUPER glad that it is Friday and the weekend is near. I need a little breathing room and a couple days off. My MIL is coming for the weekend which I am excited about, but now my wife has informed me that we might have other company coming over tomorrow as well, which I really don't want. They kind of invited themselves and my wife cannot say no to ANYTHING. I just feel like I need space and don't want to be social. Or want to be social on my own terms. I fear no one really gets that, and it will make it a big deal if I push back too much about them coming. I will probably just suck it up.

[shemarie82]

I am really struggling to stay positive today... even though it is a wonderful Friday.

I realized about the time of our wedding that my FIL to-be unfriended and blocked me from fb. He doesn't believe it our marriage or that we deserve more rights than being able to breathe basically. For the most part, I do not let thoughts of him control my life. But today I just cannot seem to let go how hurtful he is. I see him on a pretty regular basis. We just pretend that the other doesn't exist.

Today there was a conversation happening (on fb) and people were talking to him, I could see that, but I couldn't see anything that he was saying because I am blocked. I realize that I may be better off not being able to see his bigotry, but it doesn't change the fact that we are family, like it or not. B and I were together for 10 years, in the closet, partially because her fear of what he would say. She didn't come out until after we took a break actually. Since that time, he pretty much deleted me from life, even though I had looked up to him as a father figure for all that time.

He came to our wedding, but only because his wife said that she would leave him and my SIL's threatened that he would never see his grandchildren again. If we have kids, bio or foster, I would expect that he should treat them as part of his family, though I know that would not happen.

Today, it feels like putting a kid in the situation of feeling so unworthy is not fair... And, the feels will not go away.

Sorry for the longwindedness

TL;DR- Homophobia within the family is hard!

[karlamo]

shemarie82, That's so rough. I'm sorry. I can say kids have a way of changing people's hearts so maybe when you do have kids, he'll come around.

[shemarie82]

Thanks karlamo, I hope that is true. He has grandchildren from his son, daughter in law (previous relationship) and his step son. He treats the ones that are "blood" with priority, even though they are the youngest. Perhaps I just need to prepare for the worst so it doesn't hurt so bad if it is true.

[ionaerebor]

shemarie82 that is pretty horrible. Honestly, if I were you, I would not let him see any children you have unless he treated them the same as his biological grandchildren, even though it's hard.

[ionaerebor]

It's still kind of sinking in that we are pregnant, and I'm still slightly freaked out about my Dr's comments about the first beta. I hope I'll settle down a bit after our beta next week, though after that we don't have anything until a dating scan when I'm 8 weeks. Every pregnant person I have ever known has said they had this sense of bliss for the first week or two being pregnant, even through the symptoms, and I feel kind of weird that I've not had that yet. A is so excited about it, and of course I'm really happy too, but I just feel like I'm this little ball of worry, and normally I'm really not a worrier. Also I'm very upset that I never really got to see todays eclipse in the UK. My sister was up in Scotland and sent me loads of pictures. Anyway, rant over.

I'm glad it's Friday because tomorrow I can have a lie in for the first time in ages.

[mahler5]

karlamo and kh826 -- hope your little ones feel better soon.

shemarie82-- I am so sorry you are dealing with this. I would be really upset. Maybe he will come around with more time. Blocking you is really immature and hurtful. I'm glad the rest of her family doesn't feel the way he does. Hugs to you.

I found out my lymph node biopsy was negative yesterday so have had a sense of relief and gratitude yesterday and today . At the same time I've been feeling like crying today for no reason. It sort of reminds me of how I felt when the hormones first hit me when I was pregnant with C. I'm just on the birth control pills so I don't think it's the meds. Although this is the week i would have started my cycle if I wasn't on birth control, so maybe that's messing with my hormones. I'm a little afraid that when L and I start the hard core hormones the next few weeks it's not going to be pretty.

[kona]

shemarie82 I agree that your FIL is acting very immature and childish. I would have a tough time letting my children around him if I were in your situation. I hope that you can come to some peace with this situation.

mahler5 so glad the biopsy was negative that must be a relief!

I'm feeling pretty good today. Im finally over the stomach bug (since Monday), I got to my favorite yoga class and I only work on Sunday this weekend. The snow today couldn't even put a damper on my mood. I only worked 3 days this week due to being sick and I could get used to that!

edit to add comments above

[kekaellypula]

So much is going on. Today had the first of a series of tests to check my fertility. Not pleasant or fun. Monday I have the SHG and Tuesday the HSG. So far the tests have all come back normal and supposedly my insurance is actually covering this. So assuming that these next two tests and the billion vials of blood taken today come back normal as well we will be doing the first IUI in May, maybe June. Right before we finally get married and my SO leaves for Air Force BMT.

[wittyandwaiting]

karlamo - Hope R feels better and hooray for your Saturday bonus.

kh826 - First colds are terrible; hope he feels better soon. I remember when DS was a baby and had his first one: he fell asleep in his high chair in a very uncomfortable looking position but I let him stay there because he looked and sounded so peaceful.

shemarie82 - I'm so sorry that you are dealing with this. It is hard, try to remember that this is his problem and his fault - not yours. Children are resilient and moments like this become teachable.

ionaerebor - You're Pregnant!!! When I was pregnant with DS I felt more anxious and cautious than blissful until I was about 8 weeks. Whatever you're feeling is what you should be feeling. Hoping for more good news at your next beta.

mahler5 - So happy to hear your great biopsy results.

kona - hooray for feeling better!

kekaellypula - Fingers crossed for more great results!

I didn't have any significant Friday feels. I'm pretty excited about out meeting with the RE next week and moving forward again. This month off has been great but I'm ready to make a baby now!!

Edited to fix my mobile typing fails.