AW: Big Blended Family Weekend Success
Apr 7, 2015 13:34:25 GMT -5
Post by CurlieWhirlie on Apr 7, 2015 13:34:25 GMT -5
Gosh this board is totally dead, and I'll take my share of the responsibility for that — I think I come here to look for advice if I'm having a problem or a concern, but I should be sharing success stories, too! Right?
This past weekend was the littlest's first birthday, so we invited everyone over to our house for a joint birthday/Easter celebration. DH's brother came up from a couple of hours away with his family, MIL came up from a couple of hours away, and FIL and his longtime girlfriend came over from about an hour away. This was the first success: MIL and FIL haven't always been super supportive of DH, first when he separated from his ex and then when he went through with the divorce, they were both pretty disapproving and clearly wanted him to go back to her for the kids. Then when he and I had our baby together, they were like "will no one think of the children!!?" They've been gradually coming around, now that we've been together a couple of years and the little guy is one and all the other kids are FINE (obviously), but they still don't make a great deal of effort to be in our lives. So for them to both come to his home to celebrate his youngest son was a big deal for DH.
Second success: MIL and FIL have been separated for about 15 years. They are still married, but only see each other at family funerals, as far as I'm aware. FIL has been living with longtime girlfriend for ten years, in the home still co-owned by MIL. (Yes, this situation makes it even more ridiculous that they were/are disapproving of DH's divorce, but whatevs.) There isn't any bad blood between them at all, but it's AWKWARD. This was only the second time that MIL and longtime girlfriend have even met at all — in TEN YEARS. But they all pitched in for the baby and the rest of the grandkids and chatted and were friendly, and it was great.
I know DH felt really loved and supported by his family (for once) to have everyone come celebrate the baby's birthday. All the cousins love each other, including my other son, who isn't actually related to any of DH's family but who is treated just like one of the pack of cousins by everyone, so I love them for that. And my exH came to the party, too, because he a) loves to see other people being awkward b) loves parties with beer and food, and c) loves the baby, who is after all his son's brother. So I like to think that it's good for DH's family to see that there is no awkwardness or drama on MY side of the family, we are all in this together and it takes a village, etc. etc.
That turned out to be pretty long, but it was a great weekend so I wanted to AW for a sec. Carry on!
This past weekend was the littlest's first birthday, so we invited everyone over to our house for a joint birthday/Easter celebration. DH's brother came up from a couple of hours away with his family, MIL came up from a couple of hours away, and FIL and his longtime girlfriend came over from about an hour away. This was the first success: MIL and FIL haven't always been super supportive of DH, first when he separated from his ex and then when he went through with the divorce, they were both pretty disapproving and clearly wanted him to go back to her for the kids. Then when he and I had our baby together, they were like "will no one think of the children!!?" They've been gradually coming around, now that we've been together a couple of years and the little guy is one and all the other kids are FINE (obviously), but they still don't make a great deal of effort to be in our lives. So for them to both come to his home to celebrate his youngest son was a big deal for DH.
Second success: MIL and FIL have been separated for about 15 years. They are still married, but only see each other at family funerals, as far as I'm aware. FIL has been living with longtime girlfriend for ten years, in the home still co-owned by MIL. (Yes, this situation makes it even more ridiculous that they were/are disapproving of DH's divorce, but whatevs.) There isn't any bad blood between them at all, but it's AWKWARD. This was only the second time that MIL and longtime girlfriend have even met at all — in TEN YEARS. But they all pitched in for the baby and the rest of the grandkids and chatted and were friendly, and it was great.
I know DH felt really loved and supported by his family (for once) to have everyone come celebrate the baby's birthday. All the cousins love each other, including my other son, who isn't actually related to any of DH's family but who is treated just like one of the pack of cousins by everyone, so I love them for that. And my exH came to the party, too, because he a) loves to see other people being awkward b) loves parties with beer and food, and c) loves the baby, who is after all his son's brother. So I like to think that it's good for DH's family to see that there is no awkwardness or drama on MY side of the family, we are all in this together and it takes a village, etc. etc.
That turned out to be pretty long, but it was a great weekend so I wanted to AW for a sec. Carry on!
