Post by raelynn71109 on Jan 21, 2015 11:27:37 GMT -5
I'm so sorry you are going through this. Since my second loss I've really struggled at work too and there were many times that I was worried my job was on the line. I love my job and want to keep it, but when you are dealing with grief and depression it can be really hard to focus on anything else. I was very lucky that my boss, who knew about my loss, was very understanding and took it into consideration during my review. I really, really hope that everything works out ok and that you get to keep your job. I agree with PP, maybe it would help to be proactive and talk with her about the fact that you've been struggling and you know that it's affecting your job but that you are seeking help and motivated to improve. ((Hugs))
I'm so sorry things are so challenging right now. big ((hugs)). I'm glad you're going to accept the help from your mom if you need it. And hopefully things aren't as bad at work as you think! Sending positive vibes.
Post by momentomori on Jan 21, 2015 11:34:35 GMT -5
Sending so many ((hugs)). I'm sorry that you are struggling so much. I would say take your mom up on her offer too. That's what family is for. And your health (physical and mental) is the most important.
Oh love. So many ((hugs)). I found myself in the "having a hard time caring" boat and my husband sat me down and said "this is not going to work. you need to stop hating every second of every day", and it's a REALLY hard thing to hear, from anyone. So I guess I just wanted to say that i'm so thankful that you are seeking therapy. I truly hope that you don't lose your job, but I also hope that whatever happens is the right thing. So much love to you.
I'm sorry you're struggling. As PP's have said, your health and mental well-being are important.
Can you talk to your HR department about taking a leave of absence? Maybe just for a few weeks until you meet with a therapist. I'm not sure what's covered under the FMLA, but maybe there's something under there that will allow you time and keep your job secure. ((Hugs))
IUI#3 brought us our Dragon baby in 2012 Surprise BFP with Baby#2; lost our baby boy at 23+ weeks Nov, 2013 (diagnosed with Platyspondylic Skeletal Dysplasia) TTC again with no luck since June,2014
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(((((((Huge hugs)))))))) love! I hate it when I feel like I'm going to be fired.... Which is daily..... So more (((((((hugs))))))) for the shitty shit you are going through.
Me: 30 DH: 30 DS born 12/29/12 @ 41+1 TTC#2 07/2014 BFP 10/14/14 MC 11/14/14 D&C for RT 11/18/2014 Given all clear 12/15/14 - back to TTC BFP 02/28/15 ! grow baby grow! EDD 11/07/15! It's a GIRL!! My Blog
Me: 24 (hypothyroidism) DH:25 Married June 2012 TTC September 2014 BFP #1 October 17, 2014 MC #1 October 26, 2014 Benched 2 cycles- Off the bench as of Jan 2015
Post by beckynsean11 on Jan 21, 2015 15:14:20 GMT -5
Hugs honey. I'm so sorry for all you're going through. I hope things aren't as bad with work as you think. I'm glad you decided to accept your mom's offer to help, a little therapy can go a long way.
TTC since 11/2012, IR-PCOS, weak ovulation, Incompetent Cervix
BFP #1, EDD 3/30/14, M/C on 8/19/13 at 8w D&E 8/21/13 -"Tad"
BFP #2, EDD 9/16/14, IC loss on 4/12/14 at 17w4d-Rowan
BFP #3, EDD 6/20/14, preventative TVC placed 12/19/12, IC loss on 1/6/15 at 16w3d-Carson
TAC'd w/ Dr Haney on 4/20/15, Bionic cervix is in place with 2 bands!!!
5 losses (2003, 2008, 03/12, 11/12, & 10/16) All RPL testing by several REs = all normal
All IF testing by several REs = all normal 5 IUIs (2014) = BFN
IVF#1 Feb '15= BFP! U/S 04/01 = 6w5d, HR 125!, SCH measuring 2cm U/S 04/06 = 7w5d, HR 165!, SCH measuring 4cm NT scan = 13w2d, SCH no longer visible Anatomy scan = Team green . All looks great! Rainbow born on 11/22/15, team pink!
Post by mrsjac1210 on Jan 21, 2015 16:51:31 GMT -5
((Hugs)) and more ((hugs)).
Do you have fmla? (family and medical leave act) where you're at? It's up to 12 weeks a year unpaid job-protected leave for specified family or medical reasons. I had a co-worker who recently used all twelve weeks for mental health reasons. Look into it.
shit, I'm sorry you're dealing with that today - but I'm even more sorry for how down you are clearly feeling. I can see why this is a tough time of year already, and no wonder it's hard to care a ton about work. I totally get that feeling. Please lean on your mom and us as much as possible.
Post by mrsg80intn on Jan 21, 2015 17:53:15 GMT -5
Oh hun! I'm so sorry. I'm here if you need/want to chat. I hope that it doesn't come to you being fired and I think if you explain they are bound to understand.
Post by bluedaisy0627 on Jan 21, 2015 17:58:58 GMT -5
I had another long conversation with my boss with lots of tears. She actually didn't bring up the incident, but we talked about how disengaged I've been. When I laid out everything that I've been trying to deal with, I think I took her by surprise. She us encouraging me to go to my therapist appointment and talk about work when the time is right. She also mentioned a possible leave of absence and maybe that I just need a change. *side note* Work can be a huge trigger for me because both of my losses started at work. Plus, I work with several insensitive people. She mentioned that she didn't want to lose me, but that for my own health, she hopes the therapy helps. And that if through therapy, I decide that I need to leave, she'll support that decision. Not as bad as I was expecting, but we haven't really discussed the reason I feel like I could be fired. Tomorrow is another day... Thank you for checking on me!
Post by PetSquirrel on Jan 21, 2015 20:32:14 GMT -5
Agreed. Mad props for standing up and being honest. She may have changed course and decided to to bring up why you feel you might be fired, because he recognizes when a valuable person has been going through too much. Therapy is a reason to back off and give you space, and to wait and see if you 'rehabilitate' as a great employee.
I had another long conversation with my boss with lots of tears. She actually didn't bring up the incident, but we talked about how disengaged I've been. When I laid out everything that I've been trying to deal with, I think I took her by surprise. She us encouraging me to go to my therapist appointment and talk about work when the time is right. She also mentioned a possible leave of absence and maybe that I just need a change. *side note* Work can be a huge trigger for me because both of my losses started at work. Plus, I work with several insensitive people. She mentioned that she didn't want to lose me, but that for my own health, she hopes the therapy helps. And that if through therapy, I decide that I need to leave, she'll support that decision. Not as bad as I was expecting, but we haven't really discussed the reason I feel like I could be fired. Tomorrow is another day... Thank you for checking on me!
More ((((hugs))))
I'm glad your boss talked with you about what is going on and is giving you some time to try and take care of you.
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