Post by akraus2015 on Jan 21, 2015 19:01:26 GMT -5
I was a newb on TB so I've never participated in one of these before, and I can't see the polls on mobile, but I don't think I'd be a fan. I get bitched out by plenty of people on a daily basis, I don't know that I'd willingly take on more of that.
The problem with them is they usually start out pretty decent then turn into a massive dogpile.
Poster A: "Poster B- you are an obnoxious PW that continually asks the same question, but thinks if you ask it multiple times you will get different answers. Knock it the fuck off or get the fuck out."
Poster B either flips the fuck out and fun drama ensues or they pull their head out of their ass. The problem with the latter is Posters C-ZZ come out and bitch them out for it again. And again, and again because they didn't read the whole thread where it was hashed out and resolved.
Moral: READ THE WHOLE THREAD DAMN IT!
Like I said . . . this dates back to elementary school.
And where is the fun when the poster pull their heads out of their asses? It's just a dogpile then. Maybe the poster re-evaluated their posting style and are changing, or maybe they've just been publicly shamed and now feel hurt and untrusting. I've been there. I'm not saying it couldn't be light-hearted good fun, just that in all my ancient years, I've never seen that. It's bad enough when you get a dogpile in a single thread, but when you invite it, you are inevitably inviting trouble down the line, imo.
If it's lighthearted, then just call it out. Everyone can have fun. If it's not, address it then or privately.
But that said, if I'm not grasping a central tenet of this, please give me an example. Also, I'm not the primary target/audience, so I seriously have already passed my amount of caring for the topic (lest I seem far more passionate than I really on on this topic).
We once talked someone into changing their ways and picking up their dog's poop in a FFFC. I like to feel as if, because of us, there's just a little less shit in the world.
I'm so very late to everything nowadays! I am of the opinion that since call-outs are not prohibited here, that this is likely to happen one way or another. At that point that someone gets called out, the rest of us will have to determine how we react and whether we (a) jump in a agree with the OP (caller-outer), (b) WK the subject of the BOABA, or (c) play Switzerland.
Now, I can't imagine a weekly dedicated thread to this. I can certainly see the potential for a bit of a ganging up mentality to happen, particularly if/when newer posters feel like they want to jump in. Likely, anyone who does that will end up getting called out for it - but I do see people really getting upset by something like this.
Anyway, my take is that I have a few minor annoyances with certain posters, but I have always felt comfortable calling them out for specific comments that are actually problematic or offensive. If they just get on my fucking nerves after that, but commit no offenses, then I can usually look the other way, but I will for sure take the chance to call out within a thread if someone is acting like a dick.
Also, I continue to find that the truly most annoying posters seem to be uber-fertile and move on from our board pretty quickly.
At that point that someone gets called out, the rest of us will have to determine how we react and whether we (a) jump in a agree with the OP (caller-outer), (b) WK the subject of the BOABA, or (c) play Switzerland.
Lol ^^^ assumes I'm not the first one called out. Prepares to get bitched out for arrogance.
I picked porkswords because lol, but BOAB threads are great when used correctly, but I think we should start out at call outs when needed rather than a regular occurrence of a thread.
I too would rather be BO immediately and/or receive a PM if someone has a problem with me. Call outs, especially generalized or after the fact are immature, and reflect more poorly on the one calling out vs. the one being called out, IMO.
I know have my days, often put my foot in my mouth, and I also get that just not everyone is going to like me. That's fine. But being called out and feeling like everyone hates me sucks and hurts my IRL feelings...it's not fun. That's not why I'm here and I certainly don't want to do that to anyone else either. If I do something particularly twat-y or hurt someone, I want to know, so I can fix it, apologize, learn, change.
In that case, I think that your intro on PB was twat-y. You said that you lurked on TB, but neglected to mention that you were a regular poster under a different SN. Am I wrong that you were Mamasarge on TB? Why didn't you just say that? Sparkly
Wait wait wait. Wut? Sparkly you're Mamasarge? Why would you purposefully deceive us? Clearly that's what that intro was. Deception.
If I deserve to be bitched out (which I'm sure happens frequently), please do so right away so I can fix my twatish behavior now rather than later. Don't wait for a certain thread to happen to point out my grievances.
I too would rather be BO immediately and/or receive a PM if someone has a problem with me. Call outs, especially generalized or after the fact are immature, and reflect more poorly on the one calling out vs. the one being called out, IMO.
I know have my days, often put my foot in my mouth, and I also get that just not everyone is going to like me. That's fine. But being called out and feeling like everyone hates me sucks and hurts my IRL feelings...it's not fun. That's not why I'm here and I certainly don't want to do that to anyone else either. If I do something particularly twat-y or hurt someone, I want to know, so I can fix it, apologize, learn, change.
Umm, I said that I wanted to be bitched out immediately so that I could fix my behavior, not that I thought a delayed call-out was immature or that it reflects badly on the one calling me out. Please don't quote me to use what I said in an entirely different/twisted way. Kthxbye.
I too would rather be BO immediately and/or receive a PM if someone has a problem with me. Call outs, especially generalized or after the fact are immature, and reflect more poorly on the one calling out vs. the one being called out, IMO.
I know have my days, often put my foot in my mouth, and I also get that just not everyone is going to like me. That's fine. But being called out and feeling like everyone hates me sucks and hurts my IRL feelings...it's not fun. That's not why I'm here and I certainly don't want to do that to anyone else either. If I do something particularly twat-y or hurt someone, I want to know, so I can fix it, apologize, learn, change.
In that case, I think that your intro on PB was twat-y. You said that you lurked on TB, but neglected to mention that you were a regular poster under a different SN. Am I wrong that you were Mamasarge on TB? Why didn't you just say that? Sparkly
This is one of the things that had/has me confused with the switch. After 3 months of lurking, I was "getting to know" many of the regular posters on TB. Then we all switched over and some people changed their user names slightly, so I knew who their TB AE was, but others are totally different. Now I have to start the process of GTKY all over again!!
ETA: maybe it was just one person who has me confused, and I shouldn't generalize. Hopefully everyone else was fairly consistent? (hippo yours is slightly different but close enough that you can make the connection, as are many others).
I dont like the idea of a weekly/monthly thing. Its like you are looking for trouble. What I dont mind is a 'boxing ring' type thing, which, if there is a consistent problem (ie. not just an issue once which can be hashed out in the thread, but more of a someone is consistently a bitch or has bad info or whatever...) then you can make a thread calling that person out. Its a random thing vs a once every >insert time frame here<, and is only used for consistent behavior, not just a once or twice issue.
This just seems like another form of an individual pile-on. Maybe I'm misunderstanding?
I'm so very late to everything nowadays! I am of the opinion that since call-outs are not prohibited here, that this is likely to happen one way or another. At that point that someone gets called out, the rest of us will have to determine how we react and whether we (a) jump in a agree with the OP (caller-outer), (b) WK the subject of the BOABA, or (c) play Switzerland.
Now, I can't imagine a weekly dedicated thread to this. I can certainly see the potential for a bit of a ganging up mentality to happen, particularly if/when newer posters feel like they want to jump in. Likely, anyone who does that will end up getting called out for it - but I do see people really getting upset by something like this.
Anyway, my take is that I have a few minor annoyances with certain posters, but I have always felt comfortable calling them out for specific comments that are actually problematic or offensive. If they just get on my fucking nerves after that, but commit no offenses, then I can usually look the other way, but I will for sure take the chance to call out within a thread if someone is acting like a dick.
Also, I continue to find that the truly most annoying posters seem to be uber-fertile and move on from our board pretty quickly.
So what we've learned today kids is that if you want to be a twat on theBump and fit in on PB, leave FF charts out of it.
Bingo!
Yep, FF gave it away right away!!!! I knew Hippo would want the truth as soon as it sparked my spider senses!!! Thanks hippo for clearing this up for me
Post by thewickedfairy on Jan 22, 2015 0:16:48 GMT -5
So I've been mulling over this. I could see this being interesting. However, I fall into the "bitch me out when I'm acting twaty" group. I'd rather hear it in the moment it's happening rather than days or weeks later. Just my $0.02
Post by expatmama11 on Jan 22, 2015 2:10:32 GMT -5
I would rather be told in the moment if what I said was wrong or shitty. I wouldn't want someone to sit on being upset with me for weeks and then decide to start bashing me. At least if it's done right away we can all move on quicker and maybe make immediate changes.
I am in the group that wants to know if I'm being a twat. I have a weird sense of humor and sometimes I do stupid shit. Let me know if I'm doing something wrong because I would rather learn from the experience.
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