~*~PGAL Check-in 9/23~*~

[wrenofthesea]

I'll give this another go if people are still interested.  



How far along are you?



Any upcoming appointments, milestones, or special events?



Pregnancy symptoms/cravings/aversions?



QOTW: How have you dealt with telling others, especially those you aren't so close to or who maybe don't know about your loss, about this current pregnancy? (I guess this stems from my anxiety about telling friends and family we aren't so close to and haven't been that supportive but we see them IRL often and I am starting to definitely show so it is going to come out)

Anything else?

[wrenofthesea]

How far along are you? 17+5


Any upcoming appointments, milestones, or special events?

It is coming up to Lillian's first anniversary. This weekend (the 27th) is what was supposed to be her due date, but I went to 41 weeks, so next weekend is when she died and then I delivered her. It has been rough leading up to these dates so far, waking in panic attacks, having bad flashbacks, and also crazy and horrible nightmares. Just trying to take it one day at a time.


Pregnancy symptoms/cravings/aversions?

I think the nausea is finally gone which is great. The belly is really starting to grow and show. Been trying to keep up with my exercises and stretches to help the aches and pains in my hips and back.

QOTW: How have you dealt with telling others, especially those you aren't so close to or who maybe don't know about your loss, about this current pregnancy? (I guess this stems from my anxiety about telling friends and family we aren't so close to and haven't been that supportive but we see them IRL often and I am starting to definitely show so it is going to come out)

We are quite happy that I am pregnant and everything so far is going well. We have told close family and some friends. I am hoping to hold off telling those that aren't that close to us until after Lillian's first anniversary. I guess I want to make sure she has her year and that we can grieve how we want without others trying to push how happy it is that we are pregnant again and that we should be happy and focusing on that. After that I guess I am still trying to figure out what to do

[snowbigdeal]

Hi wrenofthesea. I'm not pgal, but I was lurking and just wanted to send some love your way. It sounds like you have an intense week coming up. I hope you are able to find some meaningful ways to memorialize your sweet Lillian. I will be thinking of you!

[flutterfly88]

wrenofthesea, sending you much love as Lillian's first anniversary approaches. Do you have plans for it?

How far along are you? 31w 4d


Any upcoming appointments, milestones, or special events? The one year anniversary of
my ending up in the hospital, and Parker's birth are fast approaching. (Oct 10th & Oct 20th). DH and I are making plans to celebrate his birthday and I want to do something in his honour, but I don't know what. The one idea that I had we can't afford right now.


Pregnancy symptoms/cravings/aversions? Heartburn is in full force most days, and since I've been taking iron pills I've been more queasy and been throwing up again I want sweets all the time, but at my last appointment my mfm told me I should cut them out.


QOTW: How have you dealt with telling others, especially those you aren't so close to or who maybe don't know about your loss, about this current pregnancy? I've been open and honest. The hardest part about telling people who don't know about my loss is answering the question "Is this your first?". We announced a lot earlier than with Parker, as I had to get a cerclage put in place at 14 weeks and I wanted people's support and prayers. For the most part people have been understanding, and very few have made mention of this pregnancy making Parker's death (and milestones) easier. I'm sorry that some people IRL haven't been supportive and I understand not wanting to share with them, especially with the fear that they will minimize your grief for Lillian. Some people don't seem to understand that a child born after a loss is not a "replacement".

Anything else? Thursday was my last day of work. My mfm wants me to stay off my feet as much as possible, so I'm on sick leave until baby comes, then my mat leave will kick in. It's hard to believe that I'm so close to baby's arrival. I try not to worry about all the things to come, and the "could happens", but I think my biggest fear is that we won't end up bringing home this baby either.

[wrenofthesea]

Thanks snowbigdeal, for the thoughts

flutterfly88, It took us quite a while to think of what we wanted to do for her anniversary. It is still in the works and frankly is pretty low-key. We have decided on planting a tree in our yard and this past weekend we bought a flowering dogwood that we will plant and decorate next weekend. We moved to a more permanent place a few months ago so I feel secure now planting something for her that we won't be leaving behind anytime soon. My parents are coming over and I think we will go down to our beach and spend time there. H wants to write her name in shells toward sunset and I think we will bring some candles and other mementos and just spend the time in nature honoring her. Don't stress too much trying to think of something to do, anything you do will be special and honor Parker wonderfully.

I am sorry the iron is bothering you. I had anemia last pregnancy and started off this one also anemic. I know for me I can only take it right before bed and I also had to try a few brands before there was one that wasn't so bad. My MW also suggested using the liquid iron, it is a little more expensive but she says it is much less bothersome to the stomach.

[flutterfly88]

Sept 28, 2015 12:10:35 GMT -5 wrenofthesea said:

Thanks snowbigdeal, for the thoughts

flutterfly88, It took us quite a while to think of what we wanted to do for her anniversary. It is still in the works and frankly is pretty low-key. We have decided on planting a tree in our yard and this past weekend we bought a flowering dogwood that we will plant and decorate next weekend. We moved to a more permanent place a few months ago so I feel secure now planting something for her that we won't be leaving behind anytime soon. My parents are coming over and I think we will go down to our beach and spend time there. H wants to write her name in shells toward sunset and I think we will bring some candles and other mementos and just spend the time in nature honoring her. Don't stress too much trying to think of something to do, anything you do will be special and honor Parker wonderfully.

I am sorry the iron is bothering you. I had anemia last pregnancy and started off this one also anemic. I know for me I can only take it right before bed and I also had to try a few brands before there was one that wasn't so bad. My MW also suggested using the liquid iron, it is a little more expensive but she says it is much less bothersome to the stomach.

It sounds like you have a beautiful day planned. 

I too have had to try a few different brands, the one I'm using now I take before bed which makes it a little more bearable. If I wasn't able to tolerate the pill I'm taking now my mfm's suggestion was to try the infant liquid iron next.