Shower Guest List Questions

[carolyngrace]

You know there just isn't enough drama on this new board, so let me throw out a baby shower question...

My sister & friend are throwing the shower. They asked me to give them a guest list with addresses. 

On my block are 3 ladies who go to my church and have become good friends over several years. They're definitely invited.

The question is about another 3 ladies. I don't want anyone to feel excluded, but also don't want to seem gift-grabby. They all live within the same 2 blocks of me. 

Lady 1: Lives with one of the first ladies. Met her more recently and also goes to my church. 

Lady 2: Doesn't go to my church, but she lives across the street and we get together a couple times a year with neighbors.

Lady 3: My very recent next-door neighbor. She is older (adult kids). Have been interacting a lot, swapping eggs etc, since she moved in. She has known some of the women from the first group for over a decade. 

[honeybunches101]

I hate to exclude people and potentially hurt feelings so I would err on the side of inviting all of them. Even if you don't the new neighbor super well right now, it seems like you will become closer friends as time goes on. I have never gotten a shower invite and felt like it was a gift grab. If any of them don't want to go, they can decline and not give a gift. I would feel awkward seeing them around knowing they probably know about the shower but weren't invited.

[gingerbabe]

I would rather include than exclude. I'd hate for them to find out they weren't invited and feel left out.

[Deleted]

I changed my answer from #1 to all of them because my reading comprehension finally kicked in.

[Deleted]

It seems like you have enough interaction with these ladies that it would actually be awkward if you didn't invite them.

[carolyngrace]

Ok thanks ladies. I think you're all right - I should invite them all. I just feel like I'm at a weird stage of life where I have a lot of casual friends (I'm not complaining, it just makes it complicated when it comes to events like this). So the group is getting pretty big (35+ people). But I know not everyone will be able to come, either.

[ktbear]

Agree with the others- you should invite them. They can decide to come or not but I would hate to exclude people and cause hurt feelings.

[leenziepops]

I always get worried about hurting people's feelings when it comes to parties. I'd rather invite everyone as long as I'm happy for them to be there. I'm going through a shower guest list struggle myself. I've listed just my family and friends and it's already 30 people. I might have to exclude DH's side entirely but reassure them that they're invited to the more "important" celebration which will be the one month party after baby is born. (Traditional Chinese shindig). 

[teenybird]

I put in another vote for inviting everyone. I feel like it's always better to give people the option of declining as opposed to making the choice for them. Besides, it's a party, and who doesn't like parties?!

[ombradellarosa]

Sorry to split what was a unanimous vote :/ I am the special snowflake. I agree that the first lady might feel left out since she lives with another of the ladies you are inviting. I definitely think you should invite #3 even though you haven't known her long because you have frequent personal interaction. To me, the fact that you interact with her one-on-one with regularity carries more weight than getting together with someone only as a group with other people. That said, I do think you should invite all of them because it sounds like you know them well enough? But are there other neighbours you get together with just as often that you wouldn't include? If you're inviting all those neighbours you very together with a few times a year, you have to include her. If not, there must be something else about her that makes you want to include her, so do!
I'm not sure that made any sense. It's late and I'm getting loop .

[girpipley]

I am right there with you with stage of life. We only moved here 4 years ago, and have a bunch of casual friends, but not close friends. Most of my close friends are out of town. We were not planning on having a shower, but if I was, I would invite them all.

I, personally, would feel left out if I had that much interaction with someone in my neighborhood and wasn't invited. I don't think it's gift grabby at all.