Post by chilibeansm0m on Jan 29, 2015 8:40:52 GMT -5
I really think valentine's day is just another way to get your money. Don't get me wrong. I love it when my H brings me flowers. But I'd rather receive them randomly then on a forced holiday. I hate going out on this day because everything is so frickin packed. I feel like it puts unnecessary pressure on dudes to impress just becuase it's valentine's day.
My unpopular opinion is that PB is a pain in my ass to use, even with the app. I WILL use it because all the awesome people over here way outweigh the drawbacks, but I still hate the format.
If I accidentally click on that fucking moving add above the 'next page' button one more time, I might start a killing spree.
chilibeansm0m I agree with you and my wedding anniversary is Valentine's Day. Our wedding was actually scheduled on February 13th, but Atlanta had a stupid snow/ice storm last year that screwed everything up and we pushed the wedding back a day (easy to do as it was just us and our family). I originally chose that time frame because my daughter's had a day off school around that weekend and it made it convenient, but then the plans changed and shit got screwed up. Now, we'll be forever stuck paying outrageous prices to celebrate our anniversary and dealing with huge crowds if we go out.
UO Thursday Jan 29, 2015 10:11:43 GMT -5via mobile
Post by frecklesinside on Jan 29, 2015 10:11:43 GMT -5
I think I've posted this UO before, but it keeps coming up. I think having an incredibly detailed and well researched birth plan is NOT ridiculous, pointless or any other derogatory adjective. I wouldn't have been less traumatized by E's birth had I not had a birth plan. If you have done your research and know what you want, you would have expectations and feelings regardless. Why not have it written down so nurses and doctors are on the same page? From what I've seen, they do take your plan very seriously, and if they don't, you probably went with the wrong practice in the first place. Anyhow, I'm sick of hearing about flexibility as if having a detailed plan somehow means that I don't understand birth is a crap shoot and I have to be flexible. Of course I know this, that doesn't mean I simply needed to be more flexible and wouldn't have had a traumatic experience last time. Fuck that noise.
So, anyhow, I think it is incredibly sensible to have a detailed birth plan and I think people who write it off as, oh, I'm not writing it down because birth is unpredictable, you have to be flexible!! Are maybe not considering all the reasons it might be good to have a well researched and detailed plan and why it would be good to let all of their preferences be known...
When people say it is pointless, it makes me roll my eyes and it smacks of the comments I've had regarding my feeling my first birth was traumatic...as if I should have been able to suck it up because at least my kid was healthy. Duh that was the most important fucking thing and it always will be, that doesn't change the way I experienced and processed things and not having a birth plan wouldn't change that either.
Sorry for the TLDR. Sum it up: Birth plans ARE important even if you understand birth is unpredictable and one must be flexible.
My unpopular opinion is that PB is a pain in my ass to use, even with the app. I WILL use it because all the awesome people over here way outweigh the drawbacks, but I still hate the format.
If I accidentally click on that fucking moving add above the 'next page' button one more time, I might start a killing spree.
I use it on the browser and have zero issues. I did that with TB too because the app was awful.
I think I've posted this UO before, but it keeps coming up. I think having an incredibly detailed and well researched birth plan is NOT ridiculous, pointless or any other derogatory adjective. I wouldn't have been less traumatized by E's birth had I not had a birth plan. If you have done your research and know what you want, you would have expectations and feelings regardless. Why not have it written down so nurses and doctors are on the same page? From what I've seen, they do take your plan very seriously, and if they don't, you probably went with the wrong practice in the first place. Anyhow, I'm sick of hearing about flexibility as if having a detailed plan somehow means that I don't understand birth is a crap shoot and I have to be flexible. Of course I know this, that doesn't mean I simply needed to be more flexible and wouldn't have had a traumatic experience last time. Fuck that noise.
So, anyhow, I think it is incredibly sensible to have a detailed birth plan and I think people who write it off as, oh, I'm not writing it down because birth is unpredictable, you have to be flexible!! Are maybe not considering all the reasons it might be good to have a well researched and detailed plan and why it would be good to let all of their preferences be known...
When people say it is pointless, it makes me roll my eyes and it smacks of the comments I've had regarding my feeling my first birth was traumatic...as if I should have been able to suck it up because at least my kid was healthy. Duh that was the most important fucking thing and it always will be, that doesn't change the way I experienced and processed things and not having a birth plan wouldn't change that either.
Sorry for the TLDR. Sum it up: Birth plans ARE important even if you understand birth is unpredictable and one must be flexible.
I really think valentine's day is just another way to get your money. Don't get me wrong. I love it when my H brings me flowers. But I'd rather receive them randomly then on a forced holiday. I hate going out on this day because everything is so frickin packed. I feel like it puts unnecessary pressure on dudes to impress just becuase it's valentine's day.
I'll let myself out now.
My sentiments exactly. H thinks I'm weird. I just like the candy. I'd rather celebrate our relationship on a random day that has nothing to do with anything than on a "holiday" that is just commercialized to make money. There are 364 other days of the year to celebrate each other just as much.
My UO is that I'd rather be a wedding guest than in the actual wedding. I don't like being a bridesmaid. It gets so expensive so fast and I hate having to buy a dress I only ever wear once because all the dresses are glaringly obvious they are bridesmaid dresses (at least the ones my friends choose)... I used to enjoy it when I was 20 and had more disposable income, not as much now. I'd rather get the couple a better shower or wedding present.
My unpopular opinion is that PB is a pain in my ass to use, even with the app. I WILL use it because all the awesome people over here way outweigh the drawbacks, but I still hate the format.
If I accidentally click on that fucking moving add above the 'next page' button one more time, I might start a killing spree.
I wish it saved draft posts...I always want to respond to all the randoms and forget half of my responses when I go to the next page. I know you can just write them and C&P, but still.
My UO is that I'd rather be a wedding guest than in the actual wedding. I don't like being a bridesmaid. It gets so expensive so fast and I hate having to buy a dress I only ever wear once because all the dresses are glaringly obvious they are bridesmaid dresses (at least the ones my friends choose)... I used to enjoy it when I was 20 and had more disposable income, not as much now. I'd rather get the couple a better shower or wedding present.
Post by coozieinmypurse on Jan 29, 2015 10:57:09 GMT -5
My UO is that I dislike Gifs in signatures. I have a tendency toward motion sickness and seeing them in my peripheral vision while trying to read posts tends to make me a little nauseated.
My UO is I don't care whatsoever about football and will be glad when the Superbowl is over and I am able to scroll through my FB Feed without seeing posts regarding it all.
My UO is that I dislike Gifs in signatures. I have a tendency toward motion sickness and seeing them in my peripheral vision while trying to read posts tends to make me a little nauseated.
Oh no. I'm sorry! (I disabled my siggy for you on this post.)
My UO is that I dislike Gifs in signatures. I have a tendency toward motion sickness and seeing them in my peripheral vision while trying to read posts tends to make me a little nauseated.
I'm not a fan of siggies either. There is an option in your profile to hide them so they never show up.
My UO is I don't care whatsoever about football and will be glad when the Superbowl is over and I am able to scroll through my FB Feed without seeing posts regarding it all.
Literally the only reasons i am going to my bff's super bowl party is the food, so our los can exchange xmas presents, and so i can pick up baby stuff she's loaning Me. I love my bff but can't stand football. I don't even know who's playing and i don't care. All super bowl signifies to me is bring on baseball season! My bff and her husband are big on football but I'm like why do we have to suffer? we don't invite you over for baseball!
My UO is that I dislike Gifs in signatures. I have a tendency toward motion sickness and seeing them in my peripheral vision while trying to read posts tends to make me a little nauseated.
I'm not a fan of siggies either. There is an option in your profile to hide them so they never show up.
I like seeing them usually! I love tickers and they are useful for knowing who is who. I just try to position the page so I can't see the gifs. I wouldn't want anyone to do something different just because I have a problem with them! Weirdly, the gif avatars don't bug me. Maybe it's the proximity to the post - on the side instead of under?
My UO is that I'd rather be a wedding guest than in the actual wedding. I don't like being a bridesmaid. It gets so expensive so fast and I hate having to buy a dress I only ever wear once because all the dresses are glaringly obvious they are bridesmaid dresses (at least the ones my friends choose)... I used to enjoy it when I was 20 and had more disposable income, not as much now. I'd rather get the couple a better shower or wedding present.
Totally! I'll happily attend a bachelorette party and shower, but I'm retiring my bridesmaid mantle after the wedding that I'm currently a bridesmaid in. We got to pick our own dresses, so there is half a chance I'll wear it again (Mardi Gras Ball, probably), but the rest is officially a PITA. AND, this wedding is three weeks after my due date, so that will bring a whole host of problems. I was asked just before I got my BFP and probably should have backed out, but I'm literally the only local friend the bride asked and I felt really bad for her.
I really think valentine's day is just another way to get your money. Don't get me wrong. I love it when my H brings me flowers. But I'd rather receive them randomly then on a forced holiday. I hate going out on this day because everything is so frickin packed. I feel like it puts unnecessary pressure on dudes to impress just becuase it's valentine's day.
I'll let myself out now.
My hb and I usually just make something nice at home instead of going out. Especially this year when sometimes I can eat other times I barely eat. The last few years my hb has gotten me a gold dipped rose so they are always around. He gets a different color each year and I told him this year I want pink for the baby.
I hate being in weddings as well. The second and last one I was in was for my bil. My hb was also in the wedding but he was never asked if he wanted to be. He found out because we were out to dinner for her birthday and the moh asked who the guys were and she said all at the table. Hb said he wasn't and she responded yes you are. So he was told not the way to do it.
I also really hate Valentine's Day. It's a fake holiday.
My UO is I really don't care about planning our Italian wedding. Its in July and I'm too concerned about the baby to even think about the wedding. I don't get women who want to plan everything. We're having a small wedding in a restaurant on the Amalfi Coast. The restaurant does the decorations, the cake, the favors, etc... whatever they have is good enough for me.
UO Thursday Jan 29, 2015 11:44:19 GMT -5via mobile
Post by chilibeansm0m on Jan 29, 2015 11:44:19 GMT -5
Yup the last wedding i was in last summer ruined being a bridesmaid for me. I was the only bridesmaid who had a kid so i think that didn't help them understand why i cannot sit on my ass all day watching the bride get ready at 8am for a 6pm wedding. Fuck that. I ended up spending way too much money. I had the flu the weekend of her bachelorette party and she told me well i can replace you. I should have let her. I'll never be in another wedding again until my brother and sister get married. I think it caused permanent damage to our friendship. I have expressed to her a little how i feel but my other friends are like is there ever a good time to tell her that she was a total bitch to you for her wedding? Never again. It was so Bad. The worse was when she sent us an itinerary that referred to herself in the 3rd person, "remember it is my day and i want to be a happy (name) not a stressed (name)." k but your wedding is one day. Do you want any friends after this one day? Just typing this is making me mad all over again!
I hate being in weddings as well. The second and last one I was in was for my bil. My hb was also in the wedding but he was never asked if he wanted to be. He found out because we were out to dinner for her birthday and the moh asked who the guys were and she said all at the table. Hb said he wasn't and she responded yes you are. So he was told not the way to do it.
This most recent one I was asked to be in, the bride has been SO demanding! It is really starting to hurt our friendship. It's like she's a different person. I don't like being told what to do, if you ask me nicely I'll let you know. All brides prior to her were nothing compared to this one. I wish I would have declined, but I didn't know how to. I don't even really know the groom.
I still enjoy being a guest at showers and weddings, but the etiquette breaches I'm experiencing lately have really jaded me. Some people are so tacky and rude. Ok rant over...
My UO (which I'm not sure is unpopular or not) is that I get really stabby when women brag, or act as if they are better than others, because they had a natural or med-free birth. I think we are all rock stars, regardless of how we choose go through labor and delivery of our children. I hate that some think they are better mothers, stronger women, or generally feel superior to others who chose different options.
I think I've posted this UO before, but it keeps coming up. I think having an incredibly detailed and well researched birth plan is NOT ridiculous, pointless or any other derogatory adjective. I wouldn't have been less traumatized by E's birth had I not had a birth plan. If you have done your research and know what you want, you would have expectations and feelings regardless. Why not have it written down so nurses and doctors are on the same page? From what I've seen, they do take your plan very seriously, and if they don't, you probably went with the wrong practice in the first place. Anyhow, I'm sick of hearing about flexibility as if having a detailed plan somehow means that I don't understand birth is a crap shoot and I have to be flexible. Of course I know this, that doesn't mean I simply needed to be more flexible and wouldn't have had a traumatic experience last time. Fuck that noise.
So, anyhow, I think it is incredibly sensible to have a detailed birth plan and I think people who write it off as, oh, I'm not writing it down because birth is unpredictable, you have to be flexible!! Are maybe not considering all the reasons it might be good to have a well researched and detailed plan and why it would be good to let all of their preferences be known...
When people say it is pointless, it makes me roll my eyes and it smacks of the comments I've had regarding my feeling my first birth was traumatic...as if I should have been able to suck it up because at least my kid was healthy. Duh that was the most important fucking thing and it always will be, that doesn't change the way I experienced and processed things and not having a birth plan wouldn't change that either.
Sorry for the TLDR. Sum it up: Birth plans ARE important even if you understand birth is unpredictable and one must be flexible.
SO MUCH THIS. I'm a FTM so I can't speak from experience but it concerns me that people think writing out or having a plan is unnecessary. For me the plan was as much about educating myself as it was about having a game plan for the nurses to see. Also it'll help the people assisting me in labor express my wishes when I cannot. It feels judgy as fuck when people tell me the planning is useless.
I'm an overplanner and know I can't have full control of my birth in a hospital but I've found ways to help quell my need for that in the research I've done for my plan. (Which is pretty minimal since most of my wishes are standard practice in the birthing center I'll be in)
I also really hate Valentine's Day. It's a fake holiday.
My UO is I really don't care about planning our Italian wedding. Its in July and I'm too concerned about the baby to even think about the wedding. I don't get women who want to plan everything. We're having a small wedding in a restaurant on the Amalfi Coast. The restaurant does the decorations, the cake, the favors, etc... whatever they have is good enough for me.
I did this for my wedding. We had it in St Thomas and had a super affordable beach wedding planner do everything for the ceremony and reception brunch. I literally just had to show up dressed when the car arrived. Best decision ever.
UO Thursday Jan 29, 2015 12:09:46 GMT -5via mobile
Post by frecklesinside on Jan 29, 2015 12:09:46 GMT -5
Maybe my UO should be I don't mind Valentine 's day. My H does nice things often enough for me, and we can have a nice evening out whenever, but why not have a holiday as a reason to have a nice time? Meh. Sometimes I think people hate it as a matter of principle. Be damned Hallmark holiday!! Who cares? We also never go out on the actual date, but usually do something nice the weekend before or after.
Maybe my UO should be I don't mind Valentine 's day. My H does nice things often enough for me, and we can have a nice evening out whenever, but why not have a holiday as a reason to have a nice time? Meh. Sometimes I think people hate it as a matter of principle. Be damned Hallmark holiday!! Who cares? We also never go out on the actual date, but usually do something nice the weekend before or after.
We go out the weekend before or after too. On the actual holiday we just have a nice meal at home and spend time together.
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