Working Moms Check In

[ramfan05]

Hey there ladies! Happy Friday! How have things been going?

Successes/Celebrations?

Struggles/Challenges?

Any family/me time lately?

Big plans for the weekend?


Have a great day!

[ramfan05]

Successes/Celebrations:

I'm really proud of myself because I finally had a conversation with my principal that I'd been dreading. DS will be going to kindergarten next year at a different school than where I work. My school is on a year-round schedule, DS's school is not. DH and I had decided that it would be best for me to look for a job at another school that would allow me to have the same schedule as DS so our days off could be together. I've been so nervous to talk to my principal about leaving our school next year and so yesterday I just sucked it up. He told me that respects my decision and that he completely agrees that DS and I should be on the same schedule because we are never going to get this time together back. He told me to let him know where I am applying and who he can talk to, and that he'll help me in any way I need. I felt such relief walking out of his office yesterday!

Challenges:

Sickness! The weekend after Christmas, DD got the flu. Since then, DH had the flu, DS had the flu, our dog had a bad infection, DS caught a cold, I caught his cold, then he caught another fever-inducing virus, and now DD has it. I need everyone to be healthy. I can't keep going like this. Once everyone is fever free, my plan is to wash all of the bedding (pillows included) in super hot water, and wipe down everything I possibly can with bleach. I've got to get these darn germs out of my house once and for all! (I know we will keep bringing new germs in, but it will make me feel better, anyway!)

Me/Family Time:

We've been spending some good time together as a family on the weekends, which has been great. Last Saturday we took DS ice skating for the first time, and it was so much fun! Me time has been seriously lacking, though. To the point where I cried the other night because DS couldn't fall asleep and kept coming out of his room to tell us super important (not) things. I just needed some quiet time, with no children (my own or otherwise) needing me for something. I don't know when that is ever going to happen, but it's a dream I have.

Weekend plans:

We were supposed to go to a snow sculpture competition/sledding in Breckenridge in the mountains this weekend, but with DD sick, I guess we'll just be hanging out around the house. I've been really looking forward to going and I'm glad we hadn't told DS yet, because he'd be so bummed.

[djtippietoes]

Hi There!

Successes/Celebrations? A slept through the night with no wake ups for the past 2 nights! Also. we've successfully moved his bedtime a good 45 min. earlier.

Struggles/Challenges? There's some drama at my job that's gotten pretty tiring. It doesn't directly involve me but it affects me. Also, I am struggling with keeping the house clean which really makes up upset. Our house is a mess all the time and I hate it.

Any family/me time lately? Not really since last weekend. I am going to dinner with some girlfriends on Tuesday though.

Big plans for the weekend? Going out to lunch with friends (with DH and A)

[ramfan05]

djtippietoes, yay for more sleep! I am with you about the house, though. I work really hard to try to keep up with things around the house, but DH doesn't help as much because honestly I don't think it bothers him as much as it bothers me. It's a constant struggle, but when the house is messy I feel so much more stress/anxiety.

[ciaomama]

I just had a whole big post typed up and it disappeared. Harumph.

Successes/Celebrations? DS is feeling better, so he's sleeping better, which means I've been getting more sleep. This weekend I had two 8+ hour stretches of sleep.

Struggles/Challenges? The sippy cup battle rages on at our house. I just want to move past this point already and be done with it. There has to be a turning point, right?

Any family/me time lately? I've been trying to make an effort to think of more stuff we can do outside of the house. I feel like we spend all weekend inside and it makes me feel claustrophobic.

Big plans for the weekend? Making pizza and finishing up my book tonight. Family party for my cousins tomorrow. Staying home and stuffing our faces with BCD on Sunday with some wine and ice cream thrown in for good measure.

[ciaomama]

ramfan05 That's great that your principal was so understanding and supportive! I hope your able to find a position that has a schedule to match DS's. One thing that helps with getting sickness out of the house is only using papertowels instead of hand towels. Those things spread illness pretty quickly...especially the bathroom hand towels. As for 'me' time, can you ask DH to take over while you go out and get some time to reset?

djtippietoes Yay for sleep and boo for work drama. I struggle with keeping the house clean too. I've started to just do one thing a night after DS goes to sleep, and it's usually the floors because that's what bothers me the most when it's not done.

[djtippietoes]

ramfan05 I hope everyone starts to feel better! And I totally get it about the “me” time. I get upset about that too. As for the house cleaning, it totally stresses me out when my house is messy but I’m a messy person by nature, so it’s really hard for me to keep it clean. Plus DH is a horrible slob.

ciaomama Yay for 8+ hours of sleep! Cleaning after DS goes to sleep is a good idea.

mamosey I hope you get to go on a date wtih karlamo soon. Do you guys have family near you that can watch R?

[ciaomama]

mamosey I hope you and karlamo get a chance to go out sans baby soon. I was wondering what 'stickball' was

[ciaomama]

Jan 30, 2015 9:13:12 GMT -5 mamosey said:

djtippietoes, We're working on finding a local babysitter. Our closest family is an hour away.

This is why I wish all of F14 lived close to each other.  We could all take turns watching each others kids and sleeping.

[HatTrick]

Successes/Celebrations? We are getting better at dinners. My SO got a grill for his b-day, so he's been having a blast using it for meals. Plus, I like not having to cook. Work has been stressful, but I feel like I'm starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel, now that the new/end of year reports are coming to a close.

Struggles/Challenges? Dealing with MIL. Ugh...need to get her to stop dropping by during bedtime. LO has been a terror during meal times. He wants to stand in his highchair and will scream until we put him down. But we both know he's still hungry. It's just frustrating.

Any family/me time lately? I had yesterday off for my SO's birthday. It was nice to spend time together as a family.

Big plans for the weekend? We have our house warming party tomorrow. We have been in cleaning/organizing mode for way too long. LO has swim lessons tomorrow too. Sunday is going to be our day of rest.

[innanni]

I've been meaning to join this check in. I think I need somewhere to talk about my struggles with DH on fair balance on household responisibilities. I don't have time now for a full post, but read though everyone's comments.

I hope you won't mind me joining in this late in the game.

[anji1820]

ramfan05 Good luck with finding a new job! Can you transfer within your district? And I'm sending healthy vibes to your family!
djtippietoes Hopefully the sleep trend will continue! I also struggle with keeping the house clean.
ciaomama Yay for sleep! And it sounds like you have some fun plans this weekend (food, wine, reading)!
mamosey I hope sleeping in the crib gets easier for R quickly. Hopefully Karlamo starts feelin better and you two can have a date night soon!
HatTrick Tell LO to act right in his high chair! Enjoy your housewarming party tomorrow!
@golfergirl I hope you're able to get some real me time in soon! Good job with the sippies A!

[anji1820]

Successes: A started a new daycare and she's doing great there! Our babysitter had to unexpectedly move and we had to scramble to find a new place. It's an in-home but much bigger than where she was. She's loving all the other kids and she's even napping well there! They will also be able to take the new baby next year, so we won't have to move A again.
Challenges: Add me to the list of messy housekeepers! I've never been the best at it, and I don't necessarily mind a little clutter, but it's gotten out of hand. One goal this weekend is to go through our clutter and toss or store stuff. Our house is small to begin with but it seems to be shrinking!
Family/me time: We had some family time last weekend at my SIL's baby shower and DH and I have been able to spend time together in the evenings. I had some me time at a dinner with friends las weekend, too.
Weekend plans: clean, put new car seats in the cars, finish the book I've been trying to read, hopefully sleep in on Sunday.

[wildflowers]

ramfan05 - I am so glad your principal was supportive! Keep us posted on your job search, I hope it all falls into place with ease.

@djtiptoes- I can totally relate. Household chores, the mess, and clutter is hands down my biggest stresser. Is it in your budget to have someone occasionally do a few things for you? I have got to take my own advice and do this again!

mamosey‌ - Horray for beer! The beer and snacks are really the only part of the super bowl I am interested in.

[wildflowers]

I have been waiting for this check in all week because I need your help!

Last week out of nowhere I got a surprise job offer... (poof)

So working mom check in ladies of F14, what say you?

[wildflowers]

mamosey‌- ... ( poof)

[wildflowers]

Dreaming - It is nice to get some recognition!

Edited

[ciaomama]

wildflowers I'd be concerned that the billable hours for the FT job would bleed into week nights and weekends like dreaming pointed out. How do you feel about putting LOs in daycare full time?

Dreaming it's nice to be recognized like that! I'm glad that you were able to spend some extra time with DD on her bday. Enjoy your nail appointment tonight! I've been saying I need a pedi for months

[anji1820]

wildflowers That's a tough decision! There is something to be said for having set hours and knowing when you'll be off, and for less job stress. Do you have good daycare options available? Do you think you would enjoy the work you'd be doing?

[wildflowers]

anji1820 - Both good questions, no and I don't know. Childcare is a huge problem where I live. There just isn't any. I have yet to find a spot for a child under 2 at a certified in home daycare and I have been looking for over a year! So I have no idea what I would do for child care.

[anji1820]

wildflowers Your daycare situation is tough! That sucks that it's so difficult to find a place. Sounds like that if you like what you're doing now and it works for you that it might be best to decline the other offer. But new opportunities are always exciting, too. IDK. Good luck with your decision, whatever you decide! Keep us updated!

[suzyqq02]

Hellllooooo ladies! I've been so MIA since late last week. I just caught up here!

wildflowers, it all poofed before I got here, but GL making a decision!
Dreaming, I constantly fantasize about working PT. I love what I do and don't think I'd be happy stepping away entirely for any length of time, but I just wish there was a way to have a better balance than we have now.

Successes: I had a really rough few weeks at work, just feeling like I was missing the mark at pretty much everything. But I'm feeling much more like "me" again, which is helping me get some confidence back. And LO has just been a rock star of rolling with the punches through a chaotic couple weeks.

Challenges: The weather is KILLING.ME. Between the snow storms and sickness (including my ongoing health saga), I haven't worked a full pay period since before Christmas. I have at least one day of earned time, and for the first time in a long time, I was short my hours on my last timecard. My boss doesn't care at all (I'm salaried and regularly book over and above my scheduled time), but our business office is auditing time cards for budget forecasting next year, so it's just shitty timing. And my to do list is getting longer and longer, but I don't really work in a field where working from home gets a ton accomplished. I've had more meetings and sessions cancelled than completed. Thank GOD I'm not billable.

I also lost it a little bit on MH last night, and I feel badly about it. He works a lot more hours than I do (even though I work more than FT), so naturally I usually end up picking up the home piece. But with falling so far behind at work, I'm super stressed. So when he made a comment akin to "did I really need to be doing that right now?" for something work related, I totally overreacted and snapped about how his job is always more important than mine and he doesn't take how hard I work seriously. To his credit, he's stepped it up 1000% today. We're both working from home, and he was on baby duty while I did a 2 hour conference call, he made us lunch while I was fielding a crisis call, and is asking me before he schedules calls. All of this would have just as easily been accomplished with my having a rational conversation with him rather than losing my shit, he's a perfectly reasonable guy. I just let it build up too long. Sigh.

Family/Me Time: We have entered the season of "forget about it" on both of the above. I am so grateful that MH has a good job that is the main source of support for our family, but man, sometimes being married to an accountant blows. We did go get LO's first birthday pics done Sunday and then had lunch, but they didn't come out great so it feels like sort of a bust. We're going to try again next weekend on her actual birthday.

Weekend plans: Guess it's more a recap at this point... Saturday LO and I went with my mom to help my cousin move. My mom mostly hung with LO while I helped tie things to roof racks (I was the tallest person there... when you're only about 5'7, that's a sad commentary on your genetic height pool). LO did SO amazing bouncing around from place to place. Sunday we had the aforementioned meh birthday pics, then came home to watch the Super Bowl! That was pretty much it... fairly uneventful. Counting down to next weekend's birthday party madness!

[wildflowers]

suzyqq02 & @starrynight
Sorry! I always worry I will forget to go back and edit if I wait too long! The short story is I am weighing two options; flexible, part time, stressful work w/ much less stressful but steady predictable full time work. I am really leaning towards sticking with what I am doing. Reading the two of your posts makes me really appreciate what I have working PT.

It helps so much to know you are all experiencing these struggles too. This check in is really helpful. It is so, so hard to be a working mom. So many days I feel like I just want to walk away from my career because it is so tough. ((Big group hug!))

[bribbon]

I'm late too, so wildflowers I wish you the best of luck in your decision!

Successes: NO MORE PUMP. I already AWed to you ladies. It has changed my life and expanded my wardrobe!

Challenges: Since I got back from Malaysia in November, all my work travel has been mercifully local. But that changes this month: back to the old somewhere-for-one-week-once-a-month thing. At least NO PUMPING ON THE PLANE.

Family/me time: we do have lots of good family time, but me time? ...yeah, I need to get better at this.

Weekend plans: the baby's first birthday with 40 people in the house!