I'm just now seeing this, but glad you seem to have a good plan @trudtrudy.
Ava just started sttn last week. We night weaned by gradually pushing back her feedings. I was going to still feed her once if she woke up anytime after 4, but she just sort of dropped that on her own. I did feed her at five thirty the other morning to buy us some more sleep. I second what was said about making sure she gets a good dinner and nursing session before bed. It at the very least eases my mind knowing I have filled up her tank before bed.
I would also say do what feels right. Ferber days don't pick up just a pat and leave. That totally works for ampaints btw (I've done it with m) but that didn't help w. So we pick up, rock and shush till he calms down, and then place him back in with something to the effect of "I love you I'll see you in the morning". It works for us.
Also, when do kids stop crying at all when you put them down? W will put himself to sleep but he rarely gets out down happy and will at least fuss for a few seconds. Do they ever just go "see you in the morning" and go to sleep happy the entire time?
Post by trudytrudy on Jun 24, 2016 20:59:00 GMT -5
Thanks for all the support to everyone! All good advice. packmomma I agree that a modified sleep training might be the way to go. I did that with my first baby and it might have taken longer but it kept me sane. And to respond to your question, my son stopped the tired cry at bedtime shortly after we weaned. I never thought that would happen bc he would wake up screaming so often. But now he consistently has good nights
We night weaned (unless he's sick or something) months ago. I just feel so shitty that he cries almost every time I put him down (nap or nighttime). Sometimes He's calm by the time I close his door but it still makes me feel bad.
We night weaned (unless he's sick or something) months ago. I just feel so shitty that he cries almost every time I put him down (nap or nighttime). Sometimes He's calm by the time I close his door but it still makes me feel bad.
I know the feeling! But maybe it's more of an age thing. My first one was about 13 months old when we revamped his sleep habits and he took to it well. So maybe in the next few months your LO will outgrow it.
packmomma M goes down without crying about half the time, but he wakes up crying almost every time! He usually only wakes happy when he's had a really solid nap (like 2 hours) . Makes me feel bad for him to wake upset like that.
Me: 39 DH: 39 DS1 born Sept 1999 Married Nov 2010 TTC 2010 2011 BFP ended in ectopic RE Aug 2014. Unexplained infertility Sept 2014-Dec 2014 fermera/IUI/TI BFN's
August 16, 2015 baby Boy M is born and our hearts melt!
Oh man... Last night I put the baby down late a little after 8:30. She woke up around 12:15 and I gave her while to work it out but then I looked at the clock and realized she had been crying for close to 40 minutes. 😭 I saw on the monitor she kept trying to chew on her sleep sack and I don't think she could find her pacifier. So I suffered through another 10 minutes or so of listening to her yell then I cracked the door and tossed a few pacifiers her way and within a few minutes she calmed down and laid there quietly for a few more minutes and went back to sleep. I'm feeling guilty today that I let her cry that long when she really just wanted a pacifier. Although many times I go to give her one and she throws it. But since she had such a tough night I'm going to stick with it. The night before I only gave her a few minutes then I went to her but I don't want to confuse her so we will have to be consistent
We night weaned (unless he's sick or something) months ago. I just feel so shitty that he cries almost every time I put him down (nap or nighttime). Sometimes He's calm by the time I close his door but it still makes me feel bad.
My oldest cried every time we put him down well past a year. I don't remember when exactly it stopped. Probably close to 18 months. Even now at almost 3.5 it is murder trying to leave his room after bedtime. He always wants one more kiss or one more sip of water or for me to fix his blankets again or for me to find the stuffed animal he misplaced or for me to do anything at all that will delay my going. He would probably be happiest if I would sleep with him or at least stay in bed until he falls asleep, but I just don't have that kind of time. I've done it on vacation and it turns bedtime into a two hour affair. So, I don't think it's abnormal for a kid to still cry when put down every time. It just means that he wants to let you know this isn't what he'd prefer.
My W, on the other hand, stopped crying when put down at night within two weeks of starting sleep training so there is hope for different if you have a second.
Thank you incir for letting me know that this may last. I'd rather know than not and then just think I'm doing irreparable damage to him because he never seems happy going to sleep on his own. I do try to remind myself that not all cries mean sadness and that he could just be expressing his displeasure.
Also, when do kids stop crying at all when you put them down? W will put himself to sleep but he rarely gets out down happy and will at least fuss for a few seconds. Do they ever just go "see you in the morning" and go to sleep happy the entire time?
When we sleep trained DD at seven months, it took her one night of CIO to "get it" and after that she would always cry a little when we put her down (for another two months or so). Over the last three weeks, the crying has completely stopped. She has a bed time story, gets a hug and a kiss and she rolls right over in her crib, hugs her lovey and goes to sleep. I'm sort of still in disbelief over how easy bed time is now.
She totally understands bed time now in a way that she didn't before. I really think it's developmental and they develop this skill eventually. And a good, consistent bed time routine helps.
---- 39 years old, MH is 43 TTC since 2010; Dx Unexplained Infertility; possible male factor 6 IUIs, 1 IVF, 2 FETs, 1 mmc, 1 CP Started Adoption process Feb 2015, officially waiting July 2015
Well we've got his bedtime routine down pat so he has stopped crying then (for the most part) and this weekend and last week I worked really hard on not nursing him before naps and singing to hom to put him down. Today I didn't nurse at all, sang the song, and he went down without any crying!!!! We might be getting over this crying thing.
Post by trudytrudy on Jun 27, 2016 15:50:28 GMT -5
packmomma this is a great update! I'm happy to report my little one slept all night last night! She fussed like once for 20 seconds but slept like a log the rest of the night.
Post by RandomName on Jun 27, 2016 17:22:35 GMT -5
packmomma my DD has always (and still does) fuss when we put her in bed. Up until maybe 15 months she would cry every time, then it just turned to fussing. From then until now she chats to herself and sometimes gives us a hard time. Otherwise, once it stops she's out for the night - she's always been a great sleeper. I think some kids just need to "wind down" or something.
DS (A15) would cry when put down for about 4 months after we sleep trained him then it shifted to just fussing. For the last few weeks he just stopped. Oddly once he started taking formula.
Post by RandomName on Jul 26, 2016 18:19:48 GMT -5
Bump.
@janetheconquerer, packmomma posted a sleep training guide here. It could give you some reading material tonight. It's what I did. There's lots of info in here. Not sure if you've seen this or not?
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