AW: Life. In general.
Apr 12, 2016 13:58:23 GMT -5
Post by lo95 on Apr 12, 2016 13:58:23 GMT -5
Okay Internet friends. This has been a nutso crazy week (sorry for missing this week's Money Matters) and I'm taking a minute to sit down to the computer and maybe catch a breath.
There are so many things happening right now and one in particular on the SAHM train of thought. We are currently selling our house and trying to move back closer to our home city. That's all good and well except for one thing- it will permanently shut the door on the job I'm currently on LOA from. And I thought I was okay with that. Really. But as it actually comes closer to being "a thing" I'm starting to feel a dramatic sense of doom and cloudy outlook for my professional future. Teachers are not super in-demand and there really is no way to know how long it would take me to find another teaching gig full-time when I decide to go back. This makes me feel panicky about retirement because teacher retirement is awesome and to not have enough vested time for Social Security or teacher pension at this point makes me spazzy. (Okay, let me clarify- I assume I'll continue separate retirement contributions. I also assume I'll work again somewhere at some point and get credits enough in either to at least qualify for disability benefits if, God forbid, that would become a need. My dad was disabled at 39 and so that's something I think about...) But to not have the security of my tenure at the district I've been in for long now makes me feel squeamish. I guess the round-and-round- we go part of this conversation though is that the thought of staying in this city, going back to work in another year, and putting DD in daycare makes me nauseous too. Something is going to have to be sacrificed here. And, in a sort of PMS-y rage, I'm irked about it. DH doesn't have to decide whether to be a SAHD or career man. He gets to have the benefit of me staying home with our daughter and his career. Don't get me wrong- I love staying home and would like to do it indefinitely. But it's just sort of the point of the thing.
I know this is a big ol' AW ramble. I never do well with change so I'm just all over the place. How do you handle all of the logistics of this SAHM life? I don't know how to plan for all of the "what-ifs", you know?
There are so many things happening right now and one in particular on the SAHM train of thought. We are currently selling our house and trying to move back closer to our home city. That's all good and well except for one thing- it will permanently shut the door on the job I'm currently on LOA from. And I thought I was okay with that. Really. But as it actually comes closer to being "a thing" I'm starting to feel a dramatic sense of doom and cloudy outlook for my professional future. Teachers are not super in-demand and there really is no way to know how long it would take me to find another teaching gig full-time when I decide to go back. This makes me feel panicky about retirement because teacher retirement is awesome and to not have enough vested time for Social Security or teacher pension at this point makes me spazzy. (Okay, let me clarify- I assume I'll continue separate retirement contributions. I also assume I'll work again somewhere at some point and get credits enough in either to at least qualify for disability benefits if, God forbid, that would become a need. My dad was disabled at 39 and so that's something I think about...) But to not have the security of my tenure at the district I've been in for long now makes me feel squeamish. I guess the round-and-round- we go part of this conversation though is that the thought of staying in this city, going back to work in another year, and putting DD in daycare makes me nauseous too. Something is going to have to be sacrificed here. And, in a sort of PMS-y rage, I'm irked about it. DH doesn't have to decide whether to be a SAHD or career man. He gets to have the benefit of me staying home with our daughter and his career. Don't get me wrong- I love staying home and would like to do it indefinitely. But it's just sort of the point of the thing.
I know this is a big ol' AW ramble. I never do well with change so I'm just all over the place. How do you handle all of the logistics of this SAHM life? I don't know how to plan for all of the "what-ifs", you know?