When and How will you tell your family?

[Deleted]

Our loss happened so quickly last time that we didn't even get time to think about when and how to tell our family. 

I think we will tell my family on Mothers' Day and will probably tell H's family before that since they live out of town. I think right now, our plan is to show them a photo album with pictures of all our foster kiddos and have the last page be one that says the next grandchild is arriving around Christmas...

I am a little wary about that though, because our oldest kiddo is 13...but mentally more like 8-10; so I wish there was a way we could tell my whole family and wait to tell him after the first trimester is over. I just don't know how he'd deal if something happened. 

[Deleted]

We will definitely wait to tell most other people until after the first trimester. I don't know that we'll do a facebook thing. Depending on how well I feel, I'll wait to tell work until then as well.

[requiressnacks]

I plan to tell my mom and my MIL pretty quietly on Mother's Day, because I think I'll be around 10 weeks by then.

As far as other friends/family, we host a big Memorial Day party every year and I'll probably start telling people then. I don't plan on doing a big announcement, just telling people when I see them.

I am such a lame-o when it comes to this. PGAL brain is the worst.

[babycowbell]

Our parents already know because they knew we were doing IVF so they were all waiting by the phones on beta day. I felt a little like we missed out on getting to tell them in a cute way. Oh well

We haven't told our siblings yet and I'm not sure what to for them. Maybe something for my nephews about getting a new cousin...idk. We live out of state but will be seeing them around 11 weeks so probably something then.

I'd like to do a Facebook thing but don't want to be super obvious that we did IVF but also want to acknowledge our IF for those who may be going through it silently. I don't know how to accomplish both. Maybe something subtle that at least someone going through it would wonder if that's what I'm hinting at.

[lola]

We told our parents early on (because my parents happened to be visiting the week after we found out and we're not that smooth), but we're waiting to tell other family until May, as we'll be in town for my niece's birthday party. Don't worry, we aren't going to steal any birthday thunder. Just telling siblings and grandmother that weekend, then maybe some kind of public announcement a few weeks later.

We contemplated telling parents later as well, but realized that if there was a sad outcome, we'd need their support. I told my mom by giving her an early Mother's Day gift of an Alex and Ani bracelet with the December birthstone, which is her birthstone. When she asked why there was a second bracelet, I told her it was for me because it's also the baby's birthstone (assuming everything goes according to plan).

[littlelion]

Right now my idea for announcing is to have DS wear a big brother shirt. Current fav:

SPOILER: Click to show

[\spoiler]
My immediate family knows already so it would just be for extended family and friends. The when is the hard part. I guess I'd feel ok odering the shirt past my 11th week. Then have him wear it to the next family get together.

[lastnamewithheld]

I'm in the same boat, babycowbell, since pretty much everyone close to me knew we were doing IVF.

I did post a picture of all my meds on FB after I got them with the caption: "please let this work!!" Maybe after a good NT scan (if I get that far) I'll make a post along the lines of, "it worked!!!" And a picture yet TBD.

[WineNChocolate]

We told moms and dads. But we are going to tell at 4th July cookout with all the family. We wore a shirt last time..it took an hour till anyone realized the word baby in stars and stripes with a big arrow..lol. I may have DD wear a shirt.

[hmr11913]

Love all these ideas!!!!

We plan to tell our parents with DD wearing this... in a onesie. If we have a scan this Friday, we may tell them then.

www.etsy.com/listing/270111293/im-going-to-be-a-big-sister-new-big?ref=related-7

[emilie]

Our parents all live far away but we will probably do a trip to tell them in person when I am past first tri. We probably would tell friends after that.

[sdgal]

Well, we already told my best friend because we had plans to do Drunk Disneyland on last Sunday for DH's birthday. Had to tell her why I wasn't going to partake and ride the intense rides.

I'll tell my other 2 good friends who have been very supportive during our IF on Sunday.

For telling the parents, I'm going to see if we can wait until Father's Day. Then I will get my dad this shirt The Grandfather

[kaydee0402]

We told my family yesterday. We took a picture of DS holding a sign that said, "No Silent Night Here! Baby A #2 due December 2016." We then sent it to my parents, brother and sisters. I also sent a text to my best friend that's dealing with PCOS letting her know and that if she needs space, I totally get it since I was once in her shoes. She's happy for me, but I won't bring it up to her again.

We have a big going away/Dirty Thirty party for my husband this weekend, so I'm just going to carry around a glass of alcohol and my best friend and sister have promised to help cover for me.

And we'll probably take a picture of DS in a Big Brother shirt before DH leaves and then post it on Facebook at 15 weeks like we did last time.

[Lucy]

I'm honestly not sure. Some of our really close friends know, and H is planning on telling his grandma this weekend, but I want to keep it to ourselves for the most part until after the first ultrasound. Once we see the heartbeat I'll be fine with sharing!

Except with H's mom. She wasn't very nice when we told her about being pregnant with DD 8 years ago, and I don't think we owe it to her to tell her anytime soon. She'll find out the next time we see her, which won't be until July 4th