Unsolicited advice, congrats, and hugs!

[gilder40]

So much good advice!!! I'll reiterate a few things that helped me, and add a few of my own.

1. The RNP was fantastic. We didn't get any sleep the first month or two until we got that handy-dandy contraption. Saved my sanity and helped with the reflux.

2. Newborns make a lot of crazy noise when they sleep. My LO snorted, grunted, and sounded like a pig the first several weeks. The first time she DIDN'T make noise, I woke up terrified that something was wrong. Nope...she was just sleeping normally. Imagine that.

3. Lean on your board and take full advantage of the experience, the tips, and the opportunity to commiserate over sick and teething babies while enjoying a glass of wine/liquor and a popular TV show. The ladies here are fantastic, and I am so thankful for my J15 friends.

4. Being a mom is incredible. It's tough, exhausting, confusing, and painful at times...but it is such a beautiful journey.

5. Snuggle that baby and relish their tiny-ness. My predicted June baby came early, and she turned a year old today. The best way I heard it described is that the days may seem long and slow, but the weeks pass quickly.

Good luck to all you amazing Mamas!! Here's to you and your beautiful babies!

Here's my little one. Her newborn photo and one from today.

[Kevinmac]

Thank you so much, June 15!!

[mirage86]

Congratulations to all of you lovely ladies! So many great things have been said already, but I wanted to contribute a few words as well.
1. The next couple of months will be a blur, so in the midst of everything and all of your emotions, try to take time to document it. Your LO especially will change every day, and you'll want to remember how slowly s/he moves, how that newborn cry sounds, and a myriad of other things that will be unique to your LO. Also, as gilder40 mentioned, newborns make A LOT of crazy noises in their sleep that will make you constantly question whether or not they're ok. They're ok.
2. The piece of advice that I loved best and followed the most was to just hold my baby. This is your time to rest, recover, and get to know this little person that you grew. Everything else can wait. Go ahead and have pizza for the third time this week, leave the dishes and laundry, and take a nap with your squish.
3. Give yourself grace. Nothing ever turns out quite how we expect or hope or plan, and it's ok.
4. Do what works best for you and your family, especially in regards to feeding and sleep.
5. Stay in touch with your board. It helps so much to share the highs and lows of life, especially as you adjust to this next phase of having a newborn.
6. Lurkers, join in! You'll want the support your board has to offer, and chances are someone could use your support too.
7. Try not to punch your DH the first night that he says "hey, LO slept through the night!" when in fact it was only DH who slept. Don't punch him when he says it again on a different night, either.
All of my best wishes for you to have safe deliveries and happy, healthy babies!
P.S. Don't forget to include yourself in pictures. You might not feel like it, but later you will want to look back and see how tiny your baby was in your arms, how tired you were, and how in your own way, you're rocking this whole mom thing.

[soultrane]

May 5, 2016 7:05:32 GMT -5 mirage86 said:

7. Try not to punch your DH the first night that he says "hey, LO slept through the night!" when in fact it was only DH who slept. Don't punch him when he says it again on a different night, either.

Lol, yes! Someone asked us a few weeks ago how long it took DS to sleep through the night and DH answered "Pretty much right away!!"  No, DH. No...  

[Bluedaisy]

Sooo many feels from this thread. I think it's important to note that this thread was started exactly one year after our board went from a board of pregnant ladies to starting to be a board of new mommies! It's hard to believe that's it's been a year already.

I don't have any advice other than: don't be too hard on yourself, you'll be judging yourself way more than anyone else is so be kind to yourself. You will all be great moms!

[erbear]

Congrats, J16 mamas! You're almost there! Last May was such a whirlwind of emotions for me being so close and anxious about meeting my little girl and being so nervous about bringing a new life into this world. Take lots of deep breaths and understand that sometimes you've got to just roll with what happens.

Know that you will likely never have felt a love as intense as the love you feel the moment you first see your baby.

Know that it's okay if you don't and you need time to feel that way. It doesn't make you a bad mom.

Don't be afraid to ask for help! Delegate what you can, especially in the early days. Your body needs time to heal and adjust.

If you're breastfeeding, don't give up on your worst day. It won't necessarily be easy. Seek out help.

If you're formula feeding, please don't feel guilt over it. Don't let anyone tell you you're messing up your kid for it, either.

Speaking of, avoid mommy wars as much as you can! Believe me, it's better for your own sanity.

Savor the time they're tiny. Before you know it, you'll be planning a first birthday party and giving J17 advice!

[bgkc4]

Thank you so much J15. I got Goosebumps reading this thread and realizing that you all were similarly situated a year ago (especially seeing the before and after baby pics). As a FTM I really appreciated this advice.

[purple]

And I'm foreign and don't even know what an R&P is. My daughter slept in a Moses basket until she outgrew it at twelve weeks (she's always been a big girl) and has been in a cot (what you call a crib) ever since. Although most naps only happen when she's being held. I treasure nap jail :-)

[chriskoo]

I just want to say thank you so much to J15 for this thread. Love the insight as a FTM, and the encouragement.

[txmommy14]

I absolutely love the newborn vs one year pics you guys have posted! It just reminds me how fast it goes....it feels like the calm before the time on super fast speed right now, even though I have another child I'm watching grow. And I agree, get ready, year 2 goes even faster and they change so much. 2nd birthday was much more emotional for me!

[bookninja]

Congrats to all the moms to be and soon to arrive squishes! You have the most amazing year ahead of you!
Most of the advice I thought of was already covered, but I have some specifically for moms that will be heading back to work.
Don't go back any earlier than you have to! Your work (I don't care what it is) is fine without you. I was shocked at how well mine got by without me... Never would have guessed, lol!
If you will be pumping... Please save yourself some stress and understand that your body is smart, and is all like "wait a minute, that's not a baby" for the first little bit. Don't give up, you will learn to respond to the pump. Pack yourself some things that help you relax, and take a video on your phone of your baby nursing or acting hungry. Watching that in loop will help a lot.
Take some time off now and then if you can. I always used vacation in big chunks before kids, but have enjoyed taking a day here or there a lot since my baby girl arrived.
Last but not least, and this applies to all moms, not just the ones working... Make sure and arrange some time for yourself now and then. Your sanity will thank you. Get a haircut, or a pedicure, go shopping for new shoes, catch a movie with a friend, get a sitter and have a date night, whatever works for you! It's worth it!

[2dogs2kids]

May 6, 2016 9:27:46 GMT -5 @hazeldublin said:

Oh and be very careful afterwards or you could end up with Irish twins too.

Truer words have never been spoken.

I want to add don't think it won't happen to you. Even if you went through hell and years of infertility be careful! Miracles and surprises happen!

Although I don't have Irish twins, they will be 19 months apart, this June baby was quite the surprise to us since we went through so much to just get pregnant with the first!

[beersandweirs]

Congrats on almost being at the end! The other J15 ladies have given you lots of good advice. I will just throw in a couple of things
- You don't need every baby item under the sun, some of it will never get used, and what works for one baby may not work for another.
- People are not lying when they say it gets easier, it took a long time for me to realize this!
- It's okay to think your baby is an asshole. Sometimes they are just assholes...
- They are also amazing little things that you get to see grow and learn and it really is so cool!

[gigi3126]

I'm crying while I read this. So I guess that's where my advice starts. Be prepared for your hormones to get out of control. Seriously. It was worse in the weeks after my LO was born than it was when I was pregnant. Warn your SOs now!
Everyone else offered great advice. The only other thing I would add is to get up, take a shower, and change into clean yoga pants as often as you can. It will make you feel like an actual human being more than anything else.
I'm so excited for you all and how crazy your lives are going to be shortly. It's amazing and exhausting and completely worth every moment! Congratulations!!
Here's my squish on the day he was born:
And here he is the other day, 10 1/2 months.

[mrsdee1982]

May 6, 2016 13:00:04 GMT -5 gigi3126 said:

I'm crying while I read this. So I guess that's where my advice starts. Be prepared for your hormones to get out of control. Seriously. It was worse in the weeks after my LO was born than it was when I was pregnant. Warn your SOs now!


Stuck in Box -


No joke here.  My LO was born on a Sunday night.  The following Friday night, while DH and I were eating dinner, I just started bawling out of nowhere.  He freaked out and asked what was wrong.  I looked at him and sobbed "I...DON'T...KNOWWWWWWWWW!!!!"  He laughed so hard.  Don't be surprised for random outbursts of bawling out of nowhere.  

[vlinder]

Thanks, June 15!

[Deleted]

May 6, 2016 11:39:29 GMT -5 2dogs2kids said:

May 6, 2016 9:27:46 GMT -5 @hazeldublin said:

Oh and be very careful afterwards or you could end up with Irish twins too.

Truer words have never been spoken.

I want to add don't think it won't happen to you. Even if you went through hell and years of infertility be careful! Miracles and surprises happen!

Although I don't have Irish twins, they will be 19 months apart, this June baby was quite the surprise to us since we went through so much to just get pregnant with the first!

I had the same experience as you 2dogs2kids Went through 3 yrs of trying and finally pregnant through AI and fertility drugs with DS. Was told after that we could not get pregnant on our own by multiple doctors when thinking about having a second and then....Pregnant with my June 15 baby with no effort what so ever. I was shocked! Crazy things can happen.

[dogmama22]

Congratulations, ladies! I think all of the advice has been covered. Can't wait to see some squishy babies soon!

[holliberry28]

Congratulations ladies! Wishing you all easy deliveries and healthy babies.

Everything has pretty much been covered, but I'd like to add that the Fisher Price Snugapuppy swing saved our life, and our LO slept in it for 6 + months.

Also, preciouslittlesleep.com was a lifesaver in terms of sleep advice. Leaving it here, just in case.