Leave after baby

[katelou]

What are you and your SO doing for parental leave after the baby is born? Will you have any additional help?

[lovegrilledcheese]

I had to resign from my job back in Jan because of my HG. I'm planning on being a SAHM for at least a year or two as long as DH continues with the company he is at. DH gets a month of paternity leave.

[mcktymck]

I'll be taking 12 weeks off (15 in the event of a c-section), and H will be taking 1-2 weeks off depending on how things work out financially. He doesn't receive PTO but his manager promised him a "bonus" that would cover his time off. His manager is known for not following through with his words though so we'll see. He works a lot of morning shifts though where he's out around 2pm, so at least if he has to work he'll be able to relieve me and let me get in a nap or whatever.

My grandma lives 5 minutes away so if I need any help I can give her a call, and then I know my mom will be all up in my business too since she'll be on summer vacation the first few weeks of my leave.

[cavewmn]

DH will take a week off and then go back to work. I plan to be a SAHM. If we need any extra help we will ask for it.

[comicSans]

DH just found out today that his company is adding paid parental leave...next year. Right now he just has flex time for everything and this would be additional. Too bad it in no way helps us this year.

My mil is coming to watch DD while we're in the hospital and she'll stay for maybe 2 weeks to help with the transition. DH will probably be home some then, but also work some since we'll have the extra help, and he can take more time as needed later. My mom will come at some point, for a week or so, but I'm not sure if she's helpful or just more work.

I'm planning to stop freelancing for a while and focus on the kids. DDs daycare is closing at the end of the month so she'll be home with me and baby brother 100%. We'll see how things go and I may pick up a project here and there eventually - I have a couple clients that just need small things a couple times a year - but no more regular work.

[housecarder]

I will probably take 6-8 weeks off after they arrive, maybe more if my c section doesn't heal well. I don't get any FMLA because I've not been at my job a full year but I'm ok with the short leave since I'll be working only 3 shifts a week. H is taking about 4 weeks off after they come. My MIL is school teacher and off for the summer so she plans on helping as much as she can, especially with the older ones.

[cabbagecabbage]

My mom will drive in 3 hours to care for DD for birth and hospital stay. I feel lucky that I have a great village who can watch her if I have to get to the hospital right away. But mom works full time and will need to head home after those 3 or 4 days.

DH gets a week off. We can't afford for him to take more. His leave is paid but the nature of his job contract means we rely on his guaranteed overtime and obviously paid leave is not paying an overtime rate.

I will take off at least 3 months from my very part-time job. I won't be looking for another babysitting/nanny job or day job for some time.

[lostinfaith225]

I'm a sahm, so I'm home indefinitely. Haha

Dh is going to take 2 weeks off and if I have to have a csection for some reason he will take 3. My mom is taking 2 weeks off in July. Plus she's local and can pop in.

Dh's parents are retired and live nearby. They are watching ds while we are in the hospital and will be available to help after delivery!

[tikoberry99]

After my leave I will go back 2 days a week and strictly work from home. My job is pretty laid back so I don't plan on using daycare while I work since I can work any hours during the day/night.

If for some reason dh company doesn't renew his contract or hire him on full time I'll go back full time, still working from home and he can watch the baby.

[comicSans]

That's good planning on the 2 - 3 weeks lostinfaith225.

DH took 2 weeks for DD, but he came home on Monday when my water broke and we were in the hospital until Friday, boom one week gone. My mom came i think Tuesday to Friday the next week. Then suddenly I was home alone with a 2 week old and taking her to her 2 week checkup by myself.

[sarcaztic10]

I get a full 10 weeks paid and I will probably take about 2 weeks of FMLA/unpaid leave. H only gets one week paid so he will be there right after S is born and then my mom will come down for week 2. Then after that I will be on my own.

[ellebelle]

My contract was cut at the school I work with so I've been done with work since Tuesday. I will stay home with baby for at least 12 weeks and hopefully have a job lined up for in the fall. DH will be able to work more flexible hours and will take at least a week off. My ILs will also be here to help with DD for about 3 weeks.

[willow]

I am not working currently. I don't plan on looking for a job until baby is at least 6 months, but I'm not holding myself to a specific date or month. I am staying with my parents and they have both told me it benefits no one for me to go back earlier since they can support me/baby and it's time I will never get back. I'm very fortunate to have parents that can support me emotionally and financially so that I can take as much time as I need.

[mcktymck]

willow I think it's a great idea to stay home for however you feel like after all you've been through. I'm so glad your parents are able to support you and make it a reality!

[tootsie]

I'm taking 12 unpaid week of leave, 5 will be paid a bit from a STD policy I have from my old job. I may go back several days a week or half days early, but I'm going to play it by ear. My company is really flexible with me, luckily. H will take one week.

My MIL is going to drive the 5 hours over here when I go into labor to take care of DD. I don't know how long she's staying, but I don't want her here longer than 4-5 days. I love her but she can be extremely overwhelming. My mom is coming for 2 weeks at the beginning of August. I wish we had help locally, but alas, we don't.

ETA: I'll use 3 weeks of PTO and 2 weeks of sick time on my leave, so it's really more like 7 weeks unpaid. That will deplete my time off for the year (our calendar runs 7/1-6/30) but my boss said I'm welcome to take unpaid days when I need them later on. 

[Susan0utLoud]

I will be taking 12 weeks total, and then transitioning back part time for a few weeks after that. I get paid leave for 4 weeks and have enough to PTO saved to be paid for the remaining 8 weeks and also hold back 40 of sick time and 40 of vacation. I like coming back with some time in the bank just in case.

DH works from home and has a really flexible work schedule. He's a regional sales rep and will work his schedule around us for the first month. He will be traveling a ton in August. My parents are close by and I have an aunt that lives next door. I'm not too worried about having help.

[feisty]

I'll get paid STD for 5-6 weeks depending on delivery and then will go unpaid to make 12 weeks away from work. DH doesn't get any paternity leave this time around, but plans on taking at least a week off when baby is born. We don't have any family super close, so hopefuly relying on friends to take care of DS when I go into labor. its kind of hard to coordinate since everyone works etc. My uncle and his wife are about an hour away and may come up to stay with DS if needed. Also, DS is out of his preschool right around time this baby is due, but dr is expecting me to go early...

[rungirlrun]

I'm a SAHM and will continue to be one. My H gets 12 weeks paid time off that he can use anytime in the first year of the baby's life. He's planning on taking 3 weeks initially to basically watch DS while I figure out a newborn again. I'm personally not someone who wants a lot of help with a new baby. I'd rather get into a routine because I'll be alone with the kids eventually so might as well get used to it. Having family around stresses me out more than helps.

My in-laws are coming for a week in Sept. I need H to remind them that them coming is to help and holding the baby while he/she sleeps in not helpful. I think they felt awkward when DS was a baby and didn't really know how to help so they just wanted to hold the baby. Yes, I'll let them hold the baby, but hanging out with DS will be much more useful. Then my parents are coming for a week in Oct - they're great. They'll basically do anything that is needed - cooking, cleaning, taking care of any child, house repairs without me asking. By Oct, I think I'll be more into a routine so I'll appreciate help more.

[lostinfaith225]

rungirlrun

That's how I feel! After I am feeling better from delivery, I just want to figure out my new routine with 2 kids.

I did cry insanely when Dh went back to work after ds. But I was overly tired and a new mom. I think I have more confidence........I think!

[melody330]

I'll be taking off from Sept-January. Most of that is unpaid and I took out a pension loan to get us through.

DH does not get paternity leave, although he does have FMLA available to him. However, that is only 2/3 of his pay. So he will be taking a week of vacation time when baby gets here.

That's it! My parents are close by but work also. DS will go to DC three days a week in Sept to keep him consistent and use to the routine

[rungirlrun]

lostinfaith225, don't get me wrong. I'll be a mess when H returns to work! I was more ok last time because with a newborn, I really didn't have anywhere I ever needed to be. I spent so much time sitting on the couch watching tv nursing him. But this time, I'll have to get DS to preschool 2x/week and just out of the house in general so he doesn't go crazy and in turn drive me crazy. We have no family nearby so I'm gonna have to be on top of my game. I need some of your confidence because I'm certainly lacking it this time around!

[madamewaffles]

I am planning on taking at least 12 weeks PTO maybe more depending on my c/s recovery, which would be unpaid. Luckily I have very flexible work and can do tasks from home if needed. In a perfect world, I'd SAH for a year+, but $$$. MH gets 2 weeks paid parental leave and then will take an additional week PTO. He WFH full-time anyway so I am happy he is home JIC my recovery goes slower or I need help.

[beebe918]

I'm taking 6 weeks unpaid but will probably go into the office and pick up a few hours of work to do each week. Depending on when I have the baby H will probably take btwn 0 and 3 days off. To say this is bad timing is an understatement.

[glaze]

I'm a SAHM now, with 3 kids daycare costs and such is just too much. With H's new job he doesn't get any paid days off besides holidays until after the first year. We kind of got screwed there because he had 4 weeks of PTO saved at his other job before getting laid off. His boss is going to let him take a couple days off unpaid but that's it. My mom is taking 2 weeks off to help with the older 2 though and I'm so thankful!

[lostinfaith225]

Jun 9, 2016 15:56:54 GMT -5 rungirlrun said:

lostinfaith225, don't get me wrong. I'll be a mess when H returns to work! I was more ok last time because with a newborn, I really didn't have anywhere I ever needed to be. I spent so much time sitting on the couch watching tv nursing him. But this time, I'll have to get DS to preschool 2x/week and just out of the house in general so he doesn't go crazy and in turn drive me crazy. We have no family nearby so I'm gonna have to be on top of my game. I need some of your confidence because I'm certainly lacking it this time around!

You can do it! You've got the toddler schedule down, just need to figure out how to incorporate the newborn schedule and still sleep! I'm most nervous about the lack of sleep and continuing to take ds places.

I'll be positive for us! We can do it! From what I hear from my mom friends from my last bmb who have 2, it is ok if the toddler watches tv or iPad.

[Ray]

I get a year of mat leave through the government but only 8 weeks topped up by my work so I will stay off until end of Oct. DH gets 9 months topped up to 95% and makes more on pat leave than I make working so he'll take the rest of the year.

Of course, this is assuming he doesn't get deployed anywhere which is unlikely, so I may be off longer.

Absolutely latest I will be back to work for September 2017.

My mom has offered to watch the baby while we work which was generous of her, but I'm not sure how comfortable I am with that because of the amount she drinks. I figure we'll cross that bridge when we come to it.

ETA: DH also gets 5 calendar days off as "freebies" once Flint is born so he's hoping he's born on a Monday lol

[willow]

Just reading through this thread makes me so irritated at the way mat leave is handled here. We are so ass backwards compared to pretty much every other developed country in the world.

[littlesthobo]

I also get a year off through the government, which officially starts July 4. Being a teacher though I won't be back to work until Sept 2017, so the last two months will be unpaid (not that the government EI pays great, it comes out to about 40% of what I normally make).

Last time DH took a week vacation immediately after DS' birth, and his work was flexible with the timing because it was April. This time being July, everyone's on vacation so DH will take days here or there, and then a chunk of time in September.

My dad helped out last time when DS came (walking the dog, yard work, holding DS so I could shower) and he's offered to come this time and entertain DS so I can focus on the baby. DS will stay in daycare 2 days a week for his sanity and mine! Plus it will hold his spot for when I go back to work.

[TheTuna15]

I'll be a SAHM as is the usual now. And I'll have basically zero support. Unfortunately, because MH doesn't have his own office, but works in a hospital system he chooses his vacation 6 months ahead of time. The closest he could get to baby time is the last two weeks of August, which helps precisely no one. My mother works full time, but she's going to be trying to take a week or two off when I have the baby, but they have to fly in her replacement from Arizona. So she needs to choose dates now. We're basically gambling on when this kid will get here. I'm beyond nervous about how this is going to go with not only a newborn but a toddler who's into everything.

This is basically why I haven't been participating. Haha. All doom and gloom over here.

[those3words]

I'm taking 10 weeks and then I'm going back 3 days a week for a month - then FT again starting the end of October. DH only gets 10 days off a year (including sick leave), so he'll be with us the first week - but probably working a little bit from the hospital etc.

Luckily, my parents are coming up for a few weeks to help take care of DS1 and LO. Then, I'm going to go to their house for a few weeks and leave DH at home. It is just going to be hard to manage a 2 year old and a newborn while healing from a c/s - so I'm thankful that my family is happy to be around to help.