Nwmr- vacay with toddlers help

[mommyatty]

We are planning our vacation. An honest to God vacation. We NEVER go on vacation, but I've finally put my foot down this year. I just got a 6 figure bonus, so money isn't a concern. We can do what we want to do, and I by God NEED a vacation. 

So here's the problem. We have no flipping clue what we want to do. We have been in survival mode for so long that we have no clue how to plan a vacation. First we were just out of school and poor, and I was a workaholic.  Then I got a good job so we weren't poor but I was proving myself, and I'm a workaholic. Then we had 2 babies in 21 months. And there's the fact that I'm a workaholic. So now we are trying to figure out how to plan a fun, relaxing time, dragging along what will this summer be one kid who is a year old and one who turns 3 mid-summer. 

I need ideas, fellow working moms. An all-inclusive?  A beach where we build sand castles and lay under umbrellas for a week?  Or is it better with toddlers to have lots of fun activities, like a dude ranch or something?  Do we go Disney at this young age?  What is my best shot at relaxing and having my kids have fun?  We are both nerdy, so back when we could travel as a couple, we generally went to museums and the like, in large cities. I don't really want that kind of vacation.

Here are some of our requirements:
- set up to accommodate kids
- not too terrible to get to (I'm not ready to fly to Europe with my kids yet)
- relaxation options (pretty much a place to lie down and read quietly, preferably while the kids are occupied, and I'm fine if DH and I need to trade off watching them)
- low-key activity of some sort if we want it, but not something where I am likely to try to schedule all the fun out of the trip
-comfortable accommodations, preferably with separate kids room so we don't have to go to bed at 7:00. 

Help me!  I have no clue where to start. 

[sunbutter]

If money is no object, do an all inclusive family resort in the Caribbean or Mexico. Reasonable flight and leave the planning to someone else.
Disney is great, I never thought I would say that....but your LOs are pretty young and it really doesn't lend itself to "downtime."

[mtnmomma13]

Disney cruise? I've never been on one, but a couple of my friends swear by them!

[traveltheworld]

I'm not sure where you live, but we just came back from San Diego and loved it there! DS is 2.5, we rented a 2 bedroom condo through Air B&B - the condo was across the street from the beach. Every morning we got up, had breakfast at the condo, went around San Diego (zoo, Balboa park, museums, hillcrest, etc.), had lunch somewhere, came back at 1 or 2 in the afternoon for a nap, and then went to the beach till sunset. Then we either went out to eat or ordered take-out. Once we put DS to bed, DH and I sat and watched TV, read, or chatted. It was wonderful! We didn't go to Disney or Sea World but still had enough to do for a week.

DH dislikes all-inclusives since he likes city life and always wants to check out new areas, and I just want to relax on the beach, so this was the perfect trip for all of us.

Oh and we used a baby equipment rental company and had a toddler bed delivered to the condo for DS.

[litzo27]

I would either rent a house on the beach somewhere (Cape, North Carolina, Florida, etc.) or go to an all-inclusive in sandy climates but which is more like an apartment. Eating out 3 times a day gets tiring when they are that little and sometimes you just need to scramble some eggs and eat while watching cartoons. Also if you rent a house somewhere I think you have more options for doing one or two day trips to satisfy your husband. Make sure there is wi-fi (for netflix) and I love the suggestion of baby equipment rentals. I would not do a cruise unless you've been on a cruise and love it. I hated being couped up for a week (and I still felt the swaying by the way) and the idea of being on a boat out in sea with two kids is my concept of hell.

[ericalee27]

I know a lot of families who have been happy at Beaches Turks and Caicos, all inclusive with a lot of focus on kids activities, Sesame Street characters, etc.

[erinshelley21]

I think if money were no object and I had no experience planning a vacation, I might enlist the help of a travel agent. My MIL is taking the whole family on an Alaskan cruise this summer and she's using one. Granted, she's using one because its easier for them to keep track of travel crap for 13 people, but still. A travel agent might be able to help you narrow down destinations that will fit your needs and help with equipment rentals.

[twinmomma]

I'd do an all-inclusive where you guys can just hang out at pools/beaches and participate in the activities on the property. It seems like the most stress-free option, you can probably get some kind of suite set up, and it's not going to be a jam packed vacation where you're trying to fit in a bunch of stuff like Disney would be.

[MamaPhD]

We went to Hawaii this past August (myself, DH and our then 16 month old). While the flight was a bit long (flying from the midwest), our daughter did awesome and it was SO worth it when we got there! We used Vacation Rental By Owner (VRBO)to renta a condo and a baby equipment company to rent a crib and a few other items and it was all set up in the condo when we arrived. We were across the street from the beach and were able to get the perfect balance of relaxation/lounging and activities/exploration. Having the condo is nice so we could keep snacks easily for DD and cook if we wanted to (we didn't do much of that). While she napped we would hang out on the balcony and read.

We are headed to San Diego in March and have a similar plan.

Enjoy vacation planning!

[sandandsea]

We've been on a few with DS and my two recommendations are:
1- maui. Get a nice hotel with a fun kid pool area. Nice beaches, nice pools, DS loved the kid pool area, and the luau. It was fun and DH was super sick all week but we still enjoys it. I think we stayed at the Hyatt. But the kid area was perfect. Also driving in maui is easy and there are Kmart and Walmart if you forget anythig and don't have to pack diapers.
2- an all inclusive in Mexico. Pick a nice resort on a nice beach with a fabulous kid play area. We are doing that this year with my family and I can't wait!

Other tips
Lots of sunblock
Byo beach tent if you want full shade all wee
Take grandparents/nanny with you for part of the week if you want some alone time.
Remember it won't be the same with kids. Not nearly as relaxing but still fun.

[sandandsea]

Oh an most pools on cruises are saltwater so that was a huge deterrent for us while ds is still young.

[rubberchicken]

I would do either an all-inclusive in Aruba or a vacation rental in Puerto Rico. The All-Inclusive will be more relaxing, especially if you get a place with a kids club and a kitchenette. The vacation rental will allow for more exploration/cultural immersion.

[ladylonghorn]

Good for you!!  I'm not clear how old your youngest is, but I would suggest somewhere that has childcare included. For cruises, this is 2-4 depending on the cruise line. This way you and hubby can have some true down time. I've heard wonderful things about Beaches, but personally have never been - - it's not cheap.

In Mexico, be careful about checking on min age for the childcare in the all inclusives. When we had only 2 kids, we went to Playa Del Carmen at a family all inclusive. And while it was wonderful and the kids had a great time, the childcare only started at age 4, so for us, we couldn't take advantage of it.

If money is not a concern....do you have a grandma you could offer to take along? That would give you more options.

[tas1883]

We did Oahu with DD at 23 months. Only rented a car one day and spent the rest of the time walking. Had a suite for a hotel room with full kitchen and living area along with balcony so we could put DD to bed and then hang out. Actually we always had something planned in the morning and then came back ate lunch and then all took a nap of 3 hours or so as we were worn out by the sun, water, hiking we did that morning then we went out and wandered around and ate a good dinner. I found this Go Oahu activity card so you spent x on the card and then had a whole list of activities we could schedule and do. They have them for other locations too. It was way easier than having to pay for each activity. Things DD liked was zoo, people watching, water play, boat rides, hiking (Ergo), and luau. We used the stroller a ton as we walked 5+ miles each day and our hotel was only 2 blocks from the beach.

[2chatter]

Schedules stress me out, and when they are available, I tend to get sucked into them and project manage our vacation. So all inclusives and resorts and all that tends to be more the opposite of vacation for me as I am stressed about getting the kids to camp on time, making the marshmallow roast before the good spots are taken, etc.

So we rent condos on beaches. I search for the most kid friendly condos I can find - last year ours had a sprinkler park at the beachfront. It was perfect for our toddler and the one who had just finished K had a blast. We cook easy stuff in the condo (things we don't eat at home like hot dogs wrapped in crescent rolls and boiled shrimp and corn - and the kids look forward to the "vacation menu" all year long). We pretty much just hang out on the beach, souvenir shop one afternoon, find a local museum for an excursion and do a theme park or kid activity one day. We hunt for crabs one night. We go out to dinner at the "best" local restaurant one night (some years this is a dive, some years it's white tablecloths). That's our vacation formula.

[enigmaticdrscully]

I second the recommendation for Oahu. We went in early January when LO was 26 months. She loved it. Dole pineapple plantation, beaches, sea life park, aquarium. Lots of things to do, or you can just hang out by the beach. She still talks about "going Hawaii" and when she's going back.

[Deleted]

We just rented a house with a heated pool next to the beach in Siesta Key/ Sarasota. The kids did great in the pool, and it really helped my 4 year old get more confident with the water. They also loved the beach. My kids are 4 and 2. We did Disney 1 day. I had a good time, but many of the rides they were too young for, so we had to stick to like Its a Small World, and Dumbo, and the train and people mover, so honestly we probably should have waited and then done all 4 parks because Magic Kingdom is crowded no matter what time or day of the year that you go, and the other parks are less crowded.

Renting a house is the way to go with small children. You do not want to have to eat out with them 3 times a day. We like to do our own thing, and are not really the all inclusive resort or cruise type people. We also went to the Lowry Park Zoo, Ringling Bros Mansion (although that is more for older kids and wasn't as much of a hit as the playground), visited family, went to the Cuban part of town in Tampa etc.

If I had to do it again I would do Busch Gardens or Sea World over Disney, but my H was insistent on Disney.

ETA- Hawaii is awesome, but for me it is just too long of a flight with 2 little ones.  Like Europe and NYC, I am saving Hawaii for when they get older.  The one time we tried a resort the kids care didn't start until age 4 as well, and we had to eat out at the resort restaurants 3 times a day which got really old. 

[dashofreality]

My vote would be Disney World. But that also could be because my DS ate sand and was a general pain at the beach and rental condo as a 1 yo.

We did Disney with a 6 month old and a 2 yo. Obviously if we were only going to do Disney once I would wait until the kids were older, but even at those young ages, they loved it (well the 6 month old was content at least). I would consider Art of Animation for the second room, and I would only do a few days at the parks. We weren't in the parks that long each day so it wasn't stressful and Disney is setup for kids. My DD loved the pool. She would've been content staying at the hotel/pool all week. Disney has screened babysitters you can have come to your room or dropoff for the 3 yo.

[sugarcraze]

I definitely would't do Disney. That's NOT a relaxing vacation - at least it isn't for me. Too many people, too much going on, just too much. Also, is the bonus a once-in-a-lifetime kind of thing, or might it happen again? I know that might sound weird, but my thinking is that if it's a one-time-deal - I'd want to go all out. It would be the ONLY time I'd ever be able to take a trip where money wasn't an issue. If it might happen again, I don't think I'd go crazy at this point because the kids are too small to really enjoy a ton and you guys wouldn't have the freedom you'd have if they were older - say...16 and 14.

So my 2 cents is...

One-time-bonus:
Tropical
All-Inclusive (Beaches Resort)


Future Bonus could happen:
Beach house in the states (like this: www.twiddy.com/homes/corolla/pine-island/sweet-caroline.aspx#/M8w_W3KrSM+OWtjNB5TXwA/)

[k3am]

If it's not a typo and you got a 6-figure bonus, go wherever the hell you want. Bring a nanny. Heck, bring one for each kid and seriously splurge.

Based on your wish list, it sounds like an all inclusive kid friendly resort would be a great option. Since you're not doing it all the time, splurge and get a suite a suite so that the kids are in separate sleeping quarters, and plan on hiring someone to watch them a couple times so you and DH can get a few nights to reconnect and just stay up past 10pm together.

I envy you so much right now. My bonus is already spent.

[mommyatty]

Thanks, all! This is actually an annual bonus. (It's still a new thing to me, obviously.) I just have to get used to the idea that (1) we aren't poor, and (2) it's important to stop working and take time to be a family. I know I'm a freak, but the idea of taking a week off from work feels as rebellious as if I'm dropping out of high school and running away with a motorcycle-riding older boyfriend. Which is how I know without a doubt I need a vacation.

I'm thinking either an all inclusive where we can get a condo-type situation or renting a condo/house. And back to the "used to being poor" thing, it just occurred to me that we can rent a timeshare or condo through a program for Dept of the Army employees, so that's sounding really good right now. I guess the only thing that doesn't come with is a nanny. Hmmm. Someone mentioned taking a grandma. That might work!

[mustardseed2007]

Feb 9, 2015 13:49:47 GMT -5 dashofreality said:

My vote would be Disney World. But that also could be because my DS ate sand and was a general pain at the beach and rental condo as a 1 yo.

We did Disney with a 6 month old and a 2 yo. Obviously if we were only going to do Disney once I would wait until the kids were older, but even at those young ages, they loved it (well the 6 month old was content at least). I would consider Art of Animation for the second room, and I would only do a few days at the parks. We weren't in the parks that long each day so it wasn't stressful and Disney is setup for kids. My DD loved the pool. She would've been content staying at the hotel/pool all week. Disney has screened babysitters you can have come to your room or dropoff for the 3 yo.

We've been to Disney twice with kids. Once when DS was 14 months and then recently with DS at almost 3 and DD at 8 months. It was actually totally awesome. But it wasn't what I would call totally relaxing either because we did a ton of stuff. There was a lot we could do and see even at that age, we rode lots of rides and saw tons of characters. They really both enjoyed it. Yes, the 8 month old loved looking at everything, especially the characters. We will be back, so it was not a once in a lifetime thing for us at all.

We did a condo at a beach resort with DS at 8 months and we were also miserable. We went at the wrong time of year (August, it was dictated by a wedding thing) and it rained a good deal and it was really windy with sand flying like glass into our faces. DS HATED the sand and waves.

Even though I say all that, I do think that if I wanted very relaxed trip I would try for some kind of all inclusive thing right off a beach, just at a different time of year. I've not actually done it, though, so I don't have any concrete advice about which one.

Basically I would go for something where you can leave your hotel and come right back without a ton of headache. At Disney we did that by staying at the contemporary where we could walk to the Magic Kingdom or ride the monorail or bus. At a resort, again, you want to stay some place where you can step out of your room into a pool or onto a beach, and then turn around and go back when someone needs a nap.

ETA: I agree with not doing Disney during the summer. My favorite times to go are September, 1st week of December, and 1st Week of February.

[mischiefmama]

We like to go the condo route.  No fighting other people for food/beach chairs/tables, etc.  BUT this involves cooking your own food or traveling to restaurants, so that is something to consider. We usually pic a location we want to go to, then use vrbo.com to find rentals in our price range and in a good spot.  It hasn't failed us yet.  We are mostly lazy vacationers.  Laying around and eating.  

[billybumbler]

I just got back from southern California with a 2 yo, we went to Disney, parks, joshua tree, it was awesome. There were a lot of activities she could do but not totally relaxing.

I've also been to an all inclusive type and a place when she was 18 months with grandma and it was amazing. I could really relax and take naps.

[librarychica]

I live in Florida so our vacations are beach vacations in driving distance. Even if you can't drive to a beach they're a great place for a relaxing vacay, IMO anyway. Sure there is sand to be eaten and salt but, so? That's part of the beach. The most successful trip for us was a beach near St Pete/Clearwater, FL -- Indian Rocks. It was family friendly and residential but we could still easily drive to the children's museum in St Pete, Lowry Park, the Dali Museum. We didn't, since we are from the area and also lazy, but we could have. We stayed in a condo and brought the Inlaws for half the trip and my parents for the other half and it worked out well. We have also considered going with another family and sharing a nanny (we have one and she would be more than happy to come on vacation but if you don't I am sure you could get some recommendations). With your budget you could do it up a little nicer -- definitely rent a house with a pool or a really nice condo. :-)

Really any beach would work -- west coast, east coast, Hawaii. I think the key is vacation rental over a hotel and some childcare of some sort and I would choose a beach that wasn't too isolated in case it rains or you want a little change.

[texasmomma22]

I would drag along a grandma and hit a all inclusive resort. That way you can still hang with the kids but you can also have someone to watch them if you want to go dancing or enjoya show. I heard Hawaii is nice.