STM+-hospital stay question

[la79al]

Ordinarily, I would be all for staying in the hospital as long as I can after the baby is born.  With 2 very excited girls at home, I know the craziness will begin the second I walk in the door with the baby.  BUT, my edd is the day before DD2s preschool graduation.  I know me missing her graduation will not be the end of the world and obviously if there is any medical reason we will stay in the hospital but is it completely crazy of me to leave the hospital early?  She is already not doing well with losing her baby of the family status and I don't want her to feel like she is being replaced immediately.  The frustrating part is that her preschool is literally right across the street from the hospital.  I could literally leave the hospital, walk to graduation and be back probably all within an hour.  I know edd is not a guarantee and I'm hoping to go earlier but this is what I am stressing about right now.

[shmee]

Do you really think you'd be up for that? At my hospital, you can leave 36 hours after giving birth assuming mom and baby are healthy. But I don't think I would want to be taken away from my newborn that early by choice, even if it were only for an hour or two. And physically I just can't imagine being up for it.

I think you'll have to play it by ear honestly.

[lupineaura]

I agree with shmee- unless you have the baby like 2 weeks before your EDD, I can't imagine being up for it. Could Daddy or another relative go? They could also video it and she and you could watch it together later.

[emu0013]

There is no way I would have been able to go. I had a c-section and was in a lot of pain on day 2 and 3. I was having really bad gas pains in my stomach, apparently something with air bubbles, it was awful, when I got released on day 3 I went home to my couch and it was an ordeal to just walk to the bathroom.

[lgsdesigner]

While preschool graduation is important, it is not like it's high school graduation. She will be just fine without her mommy there. 
Plus-- you really have no idea when you will go into labor (as you mentioned). You might still get to go, so don't stress just yet.
Maybe do something special with your DD a few weeks before your EDD to pre-celebrate her upcoming graduation. That will make her still feel special even if you are unable to attention her big day.

[snapdragon]

I think she'll be fine if you don't go. Depending on your birth, though, I don't agree that you will for SURE not be up to it if you have the baby soon beforehand; I went to my DD1's naming 8 days after her birth and I really felt fine. Now, I had an easy vaginal delivery, and that's not always the case.

I think you need to worry about taking care of yourself right now. Play it by ear. Your actual due date could easily be a week or two in either direction, so it's really impossible to know what will be going on that day. Just prepare your DD ahead of time that if you're in the hospital with the new baby then you won't be able to go, but Daddy will take a video and later you can watch it together. I know that my preschooler is obsessed with videos of herself, and that would be a big treat for her.

[hotcoconuts82]

I don't have any advice, but I can commiserate! DD's preschool mother's day tea is the week before my due date. I keep telling everybody unless my water breaks, I will be at the dang tea!

[mpiemont]

I think it's hard to plan ahead for something like this- you could be giving birth at the moment she graduates. Or you could be 2 weeks post partum and up to going. Or you could very well still be pregnant. I would just ask your care provider what is the earliest you can get discharged if you have an uncomplicated delivery and baby is doing fine. Then just roll with it. Personally, I think there's no reason to stress over something you have no control over.

[jenari]

I agree with the ladies that it's hard to plan ahead for something on a specific date - you could be in labour that day for all you know. The safest bet would be planning something special in advance to celebrate her day as lgsdesigner suggested.

That being said, I had an uncomplicated vaginal birth with DD 8 am Friday morning. There was a huge snowstorm forecast to start Sunday morning and after talking to the nurses and finding out we'd be discharged regardless of the weather and road conditions we asked to be let go Saturday instead. I was home by 2 pm Saturday afternoon and felt fine so it is possible. That being said, I wouldn't want to have any expectations put on myself possibly hours after giving birth. You just don't know how you'll be feeling.