I all you guys so much right now. I know others have/have had to deal with much bigger stressors than this, I just needed to throw myself a little pity party. Thanks for listening
I've thrown my own pity parties around here!! ::hugs::
Anybody else have any jaw pain? I asked and apparently it's related to relaxin. Whyyyyyy?
I think I have the opposite. I usually have a lot of jaw pain from clenching it in my sleep. Lately it's felt all loose and pain free! I just guessed it was from relaxin.
I feel super shitty. I need to eat something with protein but I'm not in the mood for our leftovers and the easy to make healthy instant food is up on a shelf where I can't reach it. I'm queasy and tired and my head hurts.
Anybody else have any jaw pain? I asked and apparently it's related to relaxin. Whyyyyyy?
I think I have the opposite. I usually have a lot of jaw pain from clenching it in my sleep. Lately it's felt all loose and pain free! I just guessed it was from relaxin.
Oh, right... That makes more sense! Relaxin would make my jaw less tight, not more... What gives!!
hummingbird125 Ahh...so all the kids were across the board. I hope you get some helpful information from having to (sorry!) take the 3 hour GTT again. Just because others have different stressors doesn't delegitimize your own!
Thanks hannahbear - I feel like such a hypocrite right now. I've always kinda mocked people on TV or online who have seemed super tied to their "birth plan" and now I'm over here like "NO - I do NOT want to be induced, I do NOT want a C-section, I want to go into labor naturally, labor at home for as long as possible. Get to tell my husband "Hey, I think it's time!" and be able to put off an epidural for as long as possible so I can walk around and change positions and stuff. I know all that stuff hasn't necessarily been thrown out the window yet, but that's how I'm feeling.
With my first, I had a vague idea of what I wanted labor to be like, but I ended up going for epidural relatively fast (got to hospital around 930am and had the epidural by 5ish, I think. Had been in labor since 5ish am, and didn't have DD til almost 6 the next morning). I didn't realize they were goong to augment with pitocin, as I went into labor on my own, but it was so sluggish and barely progressing, I am actually glad they did augment, otherwise I am sure I would have been one of the multiday laboring women, and honestly THAT freaks me out more!
I was super against induction, and despite my GD dx, my doctor didn't push me very hard. We were starting to have to talk about it, but I went into labor at 39 + 5. I did pace the hallways a bunch with my SO... I dunno, all in all, I believe you can experience what you are hoping for. I guess my rambling is partially to encourage and partially to say that pitocin was not actually the devil... but that I did at least go into labor on my own.
I apologize for rambling or any weird jumping around, I am not really awake yet. Please don't let the estimates of size and such freak you out. Even with GD, DD was just 8lb. 100% average! You 'll be all right
Anybody else have any jaw pain? I asked and apparently it's related to relaxin. Whyyyyyy?
I don't, and I'm sorry that you do I wonder if it's because your jaw may not be held in place as well as usual due to relaxin. I know my ob told me my pelvic pain was because of that (pelvis not being held as tightly as usual). Maybe it could be the same kind of thing for your jaw?
Aaaaand I just lost the morning sickness battle for the first time in many moons. Ugh. That's what I get for ignoring my whiny stomach before bed and not having a snack. Imma just hang out on this here couch before I have to get up and run errands today....
I know we were just talking about anxiety yesterday but, ugh, I am so done with it. I want to go back on my medication. I felt an itch in the middle of the night and had a burning feeling in my eye and my 3 a.m. brain became convinced that I had contracted Zika and it was going to hurt the baby. Then I started panicking that I needed to clean out the dryer vents right away or they would start a house fire. Because, you know, I can totally move my dryer.
Begin rant...So remember months ago in some thread about how I said I was going to bottle feed and not feel guilty about it?
Flash forward, I'm pumping and I hate it and I have all sorts of guilt. There is all this pressure to not only pump but to get baby girl onto the breast. I tried last night and she would only latch with a shield which wouldn't stay on and it was just pointless. When we were done baby refused to eat from a bottle because she was exhausted so the entire feed went down her ng tube. So over it. I just want her to eat from a bottle and grow so she can come home.
kokopelli, I'm so sorry about the difficulties with pumping and nursing. Having a NICU baby already is not easy and then not being able to rest when you aren't even with her because you have to pump adds more stress to it. Bottle refusal also sounds really difficult! I hope everything else is going okay with the move, baby, and your other kids with grandma.
dc2london I have a ton of mosquito bites and I've been so tired I was sure I had Zika. Not tired because I get up all night to pump or that I'm unpacking boxes all day followed by holding a 5lb baby in the evening. Nope it was Zika for sure
shanny it's so frustrating when she will suck so well and then quit after a few minutes. I know she gets tired but it is so frustrating! I'm kind not dealing or processing much because I have to much to do. My mom got her tickets to bring the kids back in 19 days so I'm really looking forward to having them home. My middle cries every time we video chat so I've had to stop video chatting because it made her to upset.
I know we were just talking about anxiety yesterday but, ugh, I am so done with it. I want to go back on my medication. I felt an itch in the middle of the night and had a burning feeling in my eye and my 3 a.m. brain became convinced that I had contracted Zika and it was going to hurt the baby. Then I started panicking that I needed to clean out the dryer vents right away or they would start a house fire. Because, you know, I can totally move my dryer.
Love tit for solidarity. It sucks but we will get through it!
I need to call my psychiatrist and get my meds dosages all figured out so I can start like the minute the babies are out.
I am having some strange sensations right now for about the past half hour...it feels like someone is kicking me in my cervix, or squeezing my cervix really hard, and it's kind of accompanied by a burning feeling. Painful enough to make me say "OW!!" out loud 3-4 times. I just had an OB appt yesterday and the baby is now head down so I know it's not her kicking me anymore. I don't know if this is what Braxton Hicks feel like - because I never could tell if I had them with my first pregnancy, and don't know what they're supposed to feel like. It is not pleasant.
kokopelli, are there any projections on when she'll be able to leave NICU? It's so hard for little babies or babies with medical issues to gain weight when they get so tired from feeding so soon! It is so unfair that feeding, the thing that will make it easier for them to grow and not be tired, is the thing that makes them so tired right now. Did the hospital provide you a hospital grade pump to use or are you using a home grade (not sure what else they'd call it, haha) pump? I'm getting nervous about how LO will do in <5 weeks when he is born and sent to NICU...DD had a hard time nursing for the first couple of days because of a tongue tie, but I imagine a NICU baby will have a much harder time.
I am having some strange sensations right now for about the past half hour...it feels like someone is kicking me in my cervix, or squeezing my cervix really hard, and it's kind of accompanied by a burning feeling. Painful enough to make me say "OW!!" out loud 3-4 times. I just had an OB appt yesterday and the baby is now head down so I know it's not her kicking me anymore. I don't know if this is what Braxton Hicks feel like - because I never could tell if I had them with my first pregnancy, and don't know what they're supposed to feel like. It is not pleasant.
I've been having that too the last few days! It's not BH because I've been having those for quite a while and this is new. My baby is also head down but I wonder if his hands could be hitting my cervix? Or maybe it's a headbutt?
hummingbird125 sending you so many hugs, just know this weekend, smoked meats and pool time will make it all better!!!!!
kokopelli I'm sorry you're having issues I hope everything works out!
I had my first BPP today and it was surprisingly fast! The kid finally showed her face to the camera for the first time since I was 18 weeks and she looks like her dad. And she has no hair. I'm hoping there is some part of me that looks like her, I did all the work so far!!!!
I go back next week for another BPP and OB visit, I can't believe I'm at every week appointments now!
MH is home with a man cold so I have to clean the living room by myself which is sometimes the dirtiest room in the house (thanks fur babies)
Oh! The nursery is painted and we'll start putting furniture in next weekend, it still seems like a guest room to me, none of this feels real yet.
shanny this hospital doesn't provide a pump but I rented a hospital grade one from the children's hospital. It's the medela Symphony and as far as pumps go has been the best I have ever used. I get about 2 to 3 Oz every 3 hours which is enough for her now. She only eats 40ml every 3 hours. She has a check list of about 20 things she needs to do before she can leave. One of which is eat all 8 bottles for five days in a row. That's hard when she barely eats 1 bottle once a day. She also has to start waking up and giving cues she is ready to eat. She doesn't do that yet. They originally said maybe by 36 weeks but now most people are saying 39 or 40 weeks.
They told me day one be prepared to fail at breastfeeding. She will come home on 2 of the 8 feeds as neosure formula since premies need extra calories. But her neonatologist is an old school dr and he insists we try to breastfeed. Super annoying to be told you will fail but you have to try anyways
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