IRL Speshal Snowflake.. ok, just needs education- vent

[vh2014]

I got a fun text (NOT) yesterday... I'll share at the end but first, the back story:

I met this girl over the summer.  She is the fiance of DH's good friend.  She's fun to be with, though a little too "instantly close" 

She came to a party at our house at the beginning of December.  She asked if DH and I were going to have kids.  I know... rude question for someone you've only met one other time... but I'm that person that random people in the grocery store tell their secrets to so Ok. I just said we were going to see what happens.

She then proceeds to tell me that she had a "scare" (insert rolly eyes here)   But she wants a baby so they are getting rid of BC.  um, ok.  Her "scare" was that she was late... and yes, she's 41.  So I proceed to tell her that I am on CD ridiculous and educate her a bit about cycles and getting older.  (I'd had the failed Provera by that point).  She informs me she always is on time so that won't be her and tells me about her app... yep... at 41 she is still under the impression that she O's on CD14 and if she is 28 days on BCP she'll always be 28 days.  I introduced her to temping and FF, but really... to no avail I'm sure. 

So fast forward.  New Years we invite them over.  She keeps going on and on about wanting a baby and how they are not going to use BC anymore so we'll probably be pregnant together... I was waiting to see the RE at that point.  It was late, I was drinking after my BFN (just to be sure) and she did mention how maybe the test could be wrong or it was too early..... I changed the subject a few times.  

So yesterday she texts me out of the blue to say she's been thinking about us.  We had talked about getting together last month but I just couldn't.deal. with. that. We exchange texts about maybe getting together when the weather gets warmer, etc..and then the shoe drops... she sends the dreaded "Any News?" text. 

I'm sure she was just trying to show interest but I wanted to reply back, " yeah, my Ute is broken and now I am sobbing in a heap on the floor, thanks for asking since we've met 3 times and I'm not really sharing!" (no, I wasn't really sobbing... just annoyed.  I didn't reply at all)  So I know I brought some of this on myself because I answered her to begin with but geez...

Although a part of me is wondering if she's having lots of sex and not pregnant and really just wants support and is now ready to be educated.  So I feel bad for not replying.. but also couldn't handle her sending me... well we are!!! And telling me all about how easy it is... 

OK, whining session over.  Thanks for listening. Some yummy chocolate covered strawberries for reading it all:

[luvmyponies]

Oh how I can't stand those people that meet you for three minutes and want to be instant besties. Then I end up feeling like an unfriendly standoffish weirdo when they're really the weirdos who think it's appropriate to talk about stuff like that with someone you barely know. Boundaries are clearly something not everyone understands. Take it from someone who is constantly running from strangers in the grocery store who want to share their deepest secrets while contemplating which brand of toilet paper to buy - keep her at arm's length!! She'll eventually figure it out that reproduction is more complicated than what they taught us in middle school health class. And if she does happen to be some kind of freak who gets pregnant at 41 like she's a 16 year old, you don't want to be around to get that text from her!

[vh2014]

Feb 9, 2015 15:27:31 GMT -5 luvmyponies said:

Oh how I can't stand those people that meet you for three minutes and want to be instant besties. Then I end up feeling like an unfriendly standoffish weirdo when they're really the weirdos who think it's appropriate to talk about stuff like that with someone you barely know. Boundaries are clearly something not everyone understands. Take it from someone who is constantly running from strangers in the grocery store who want to share their deepest secrets while contemplating which brand of toilet paper to buy - keep her at arm's length!! She'll eventually figure it out that reproduction is more complicated than what they taught us in middle school health class. And if she does happen to be some kind of freak who gets pregnant at 41 like she's a 16 year old, you don't want to be around to get that text from her!

I think it's the bold part that bothered me the most.  I felt like I was being an indian giver and taking back my openness, but really she stole it to beign with LOL.   And you are right... that would suck. 

[peanutmuse]

I can totally understand how frustrating, irritating, annoying, etc. this is. All of it. Ugh.

[luvmyponies]

Even when I'm uncomfortable with someone's "friendliness," I always tend to open up and give away too much too soon (in an effort not to be an unfriendly standoffish weirdo). And then inevitably, they get crazy, too intense, and I have to find a way to gracefully back away and "cool off" the "friendship." If it was honestly a give and take, that would be one thing. But far too often people who get too close too quickly are just looking to unload on someone and provide very little support in return.

[nikolie93]

Feb 9, 2015 17:27:12 GMT -5 luvmyponies said:

Even when I'm uncomfortable with someone's "friendliness," I always tend to open up and give away too much too soon (in an effort not to be an unfriendly standoffish weirdo). And then inevitably, they get crazy, too intense, and I have to find a way to gracefully back away and "cool off" the "friendship." If it was honestly a give and take, that would be one thing. But far too often people who get too close too quickly are just looking to unload on someone and provide very little support in return.

This is me.

Ugh. Lol

[meredithcarole]

I'm not gonna lie...the whole time I was reading your post I was afraid her text was going to announce her managing to get KU like it is as easy as falling off a log. I'm glad she was just fishing... To your point, however, she needs to calm down a bit on the immediate BFF tactics.

[wirt2cute]

Feb 9, 2015 21:19:21 GMT -5 meredithcarole said:

I'm not gonna lie...the whole time I was reading your post I was afraid her text was going to announce her managing to get KU like it is as easy as falling off a log. I'm glad she was just fishing... To your point, however, she needs to calm down a bit on the immediate BFF tactics.

I skipped down to the end just to make sure that is not how this all ended. It has to be frustrating when people invoke there lives and everything on you. I'm a real people person but some days I don't want to hear everybody in the grocery stores life story. At least you were actually making and effort to be cordial in the text, but I would not have responded either.

[vh2014]

Feb 9, 2015 19:26:35 GMT -5 nikolie93 said:

Feb 9, 2015 17:27:12 GMT -5 luvmyponies said:

Even when I'm uncomfortable with someone's "friendliness," I always tend to open up and give away too much too soon (in an effort not to be an unfriendly standoffish weirdo). And then inevitably, they get crazy, too intense, and I have to find a way to gracefully back away and "cool off" the "friendship." If it was honestly a give and take, that would be one thing. But far too often people who get too close too quickly are just looking to unload on someone and provide very little support in return.

This is me.

Ugh. Lol

Yep, me too. Sigh. 

[agpjt413]

Feb 9, 2015 21:19:21 GMT -5 meredithcarole said:

I'm not gonna lie...the whole time I was reading your post I was afraid her text was going to announce her managing to get KU like it is as easy as falling off a log. I'm glad she was just fishing... To your point, however, she needs to calm down a bit on the immediate BFF tactics.

Mere's in my head again! That's exactly what I was thinking - and what I was going to say.