Our parents are 2 hours away but could come help if we needed them to for a few days. My parents are retired and my MIL doesn't work so it easy for them. My mom came for the week in September when A had HFM. It was really nice to not have to take time off work. She even did our laundry while we were at work
Totally depends on the day, we decide based on meetings, deliverables, etc. A lot of times we split the day so one goes in to the office in the morning, the other in the afternoon. We can both work from home so that also adds flexibility. We can make up hours at night if needed
We don't have a very good system. At the moment, DH takes off usually as I just started a new job and don't want to be too difficult at the start! LO was in hospital for several days twice last year (bad asthma attacks) and we both had to take off as someone had to be there 24 hours a day - we did 12 hour shifts, worked from home a bit and just tried to keep it together. We live overseas so aren't around any family and any friends who might help have their own kids. It's a problem every.single.time
With your work benefit do you get sick care? I used to get an in home nanny through work when one of the kids was sick; now it's center based sick care (there's one on the way to DH's office). That has saved us with the youngest.
And I feel you on the general schedule - DH can work late, but I never can. I get to log back in after homework, dinner, bath and getting the kids down. I used to work late every Friday but DH has had meetings every Friday - it's been a battle. I need one day where it's not me picking up/doing everything!
I just have to chime in and say I can't believe how many family members everyone has helping out. I think that's really great! I have two sisters close by, as well as my mom and my dad and step mom. Nobody EVER helps. We have had family as babysitters 4 times total in DS's 21 mos of life. They have never offered to help watch him if we're in a jam or pick him up from daycare or anything.
Are your families offering? Or do you ask them when you're in a bind?
my in-laws help out all the time (they are about an hour away). my parents would too but they are 3+ hours away and not retired yet.
as far as sisters / siblings go, i have to admit that i have not ever helped out my SIL with her kids simply because prior to having LO i was totally uncomfortable with the thought of watching her kids alone. i just did not feel like i knew what to do - especially with babies! i wanted to help but wasn't sure how to reach out.
it's kind of the same situation with my family right now - i'm the first one to have kids. my siblings want to help but at the same time don't quite know what to do without help or guidance. is your family just uninterested?
I think my work has a program but I wasn't comfortable using it when I worked outside the home because it would be a stranger. Maybe now that I work from home I coukd give it a try again...at least Id be home to supervise...
The stranger danger thing is part of the reason why we still have this in our back pocket but haven't ever pulled the trigger. If we can do something else, we have. But if we ever get a kid with a real bad, long illness, we're going to have to go there. Particularly b/c of my mom's health, I'm starting to rethink the way we have her help. It's not just ability, I don't want her getting ill from something our kids have.
Post by mustardseed2007 on Feb 11, 2015 16:01:22 GMT -5
thirdtimemomma the nanny service we could use but haven't yet has the person call you before coming over so you can speak to them and do a quick decision on whether you want them or not. If you don't want them, you just call the nanny service back and say -- uh no. Of course they don't have anyone who doesn't have experience with children. That's weird.
I just have to chime in and say I can't believe how many family members everyone has helping out. I think that's really great! I have two sisters close by, as well as my mom and my dad and step mom. Nobody EVER helps. We have had family as babysitters 4 times total in DS's 21 mos of life. They have never offered to help watch him if we're in a jam or pick him up from daycare or anything.
Are your families offering? Or do you ask them when you're in a bind?
my in-laws help out all the time (they are about an hour away). my parents would too but they are 3+ hours away and not retired yet.
as far as sisters / siblings go, i have to admit that i have not ever helped out my SIL with her kids simply because prior to having LO i was totally uncomfortable with the thought of watching her kids alone. i just did not feel like i knew what to do - especially with babies! i wanted to help but wasn't sure how to reach out.
it's kind of the same situation with my family right now - i'm the first one to have kids. my siblings want to help but at the same time don't quite know what to do without help or guidance. is your family just uninterested?
Haha yep they're just uninterested. I never realized how self-centered they were until I became a mom and realized everyone else's families help them. It's insane. Part of it is my mom and sisters work full-time. But my Dad is retired so a big WTF to him.
I just have to chime in and say I can't believe how many family members everyone has helping out. I think that's really great! I have two sisters close by, as well as my mom and my dad and step mom. Nobody EVER helps. We have had family as babysitters 4 times total in DS's 21 mos of life. They have never offered to help watch him if we're in a jam or pick him up from daycare or anything.
Are your families offering? Or do you ask them when you're in a bind?
both my mom and my brother have offered. my mom doesn't work so it's easy for her make the drive to us. my brother has a flexible work schedule, so if he doesn't have meetings scheduled he can "WFH" ie be at our house taking care of G.
in all reality though, I feel guilty leaving her home with someone else when she's sick. so my H and I usually rotate. we try to utilize my mom and brother for the days that we know that DC will be closed.
I've stayed home with LO a couple times while he was sick, but I'm still re-accruing sick and vacation after FMLA wiped it all out. I'm trying to scrape together a little sick time so if I'm sick I can take it.
DH on the other hand has unlimited sick time and can work from home. My job doesn't allow that at all. So the last couple times, DH has stayed home and if we know it's going to be several days we call in my mom for reinforcements.
Post by tmclawchick on Feb 12, 2015 11:43:35 GMT -5
We take turns unless one of us has something urgent going on. We don't have any family close to us, so it's just us. DH also has back-up care available through his job, but we have yet to look into it... we probably should!
It's usually me. If I desperate DH will step in for a few hours. Sorry no real help. We are thinking of getting a nanny instead of LO going to preschool.
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