Parenting Check In July 18

[kona]

How is life treating you?

QOTW: How different/similar is actual parenting rather than the thoughts you had about parenting before becoming a parent?

[kona]

O's birthday party was yesterday. It was fine overall but I really think we are done with family birthday parties. There is way too much family drama and I don't want to deal with it. We will resume parties when she has friends to invite over. O still had a fever and she was a trooper but she wasn't acting quite her normal self.

I'm overwhelmed with the last weekend. My sister is still in town and we still have a sick kid to deal with. I keep hoping that the fever will go away but it doesn't seem like it really is. It will come down with medicine but creeps back up again. O has never been sick so this is new territory for us. M is staying home today and is going to call the peds office when it opens. It's so weird because she seems to have no other symptoms other than a fever. M also has a midwife visit this afternoon. I really just wanted to stay home with my family today and forget work. Working is the worst sometimes.

My dad's party was fine on Saturday night. We stayed for about 90 minutes. Our attire was most appropriate, so thank you all for your input. With O's fever we didn't want to stay late but really it was just a good excuse to leave.

Family is rough sometimes. I hope that M and I don't mess up and leave O and #2 with a mess of a family. I wish we had a close family, we just don't with my parents being divorced and M's family having a long history of alcoholism.

QOTW: Parenting is a lot tougher than I thought. My biggest hang up at this stage is not being able to get much done even when I am at home. It seems like I should be able to still clean and cook and get chores done but watching a 2 yo is a full time job. It also has more rewards than I could have ever imagined.

[karlamo]

R is 2 and L is almost 11months.

L is walking all over the place. He walks over crawling. He has that new walker gait that makes him look like a baby dinosaur lumbering all over the house. He's so cute. He is repeating words back at house which is crazy. R didn't start talking to well after a year and this little guy is mimicking everything we say. I really think he may be gifted. I know, I know, every parent thinks that, but honestly his motor development plus cognitive development is well above where R was at this age and I thought R was on the high end of normal. We shall see in a few years if we need to start saving for MIT.

R is talking in full sentences and it's fun. He is into this random book called Living the West Virginia Way. He laughs his head off whenever he or I say the title of it. The book is so boring, sorry West Virginians, but it makes him happy. He also likes it accompanied by us singing Country Roads. We have taken to singing this at the dinner table and even L joins in in the laughing.


Over the weekend we bought stuff for the boys' new bathroom, their own bathroom! I am thrilled to not have to share a bathroom with boys! We went with a whale/ water theme. I plan to take a black and white picture of the boys in the bathtub and frame it for the space. We never take naked pictures of them but I think this may be cute to have hung in there and no one but them will be using it so we should be good.

QOTW: ALL OF IT! Seriously, I remember daydreaming of what it was going to be like to have kids and that did not match up with the reality at all. The love is stronger, the days are longer, the work is harder, life is funner:) I would choose it all again but I also look forward to my kids becoming more independent and thus me getting more of my old life back.

[karlamo]

kona, Hope O feels better soon. I'm impressed she's never sick. You know how I live at the peds office. I haven't been there in almost 2 months, I'm starting to miss them.

[2brides]

Swim team is over. As much as I grumbled about getting home late every night, I really am going to miss it! C is now saying he wants to swim next year. ❤️

L is doing a ton of travel for work over the next month. She left yesterday and will be back tomorrow. It's not a big deal except I get to work an hour late and have to leave 30m early to get them from camp. And tomorrow I have to leave 90 minutes early because G's glasses broke. Oh well.

QOTD: it's probably a copout to say I don't remember what I thought parenting would be like. I can barely remember what it was like not to have kids. I know I did not anticipate the intense sleep deprivation!! That nearly killed us. I didn't anticipate PPD (and did not realize I had it until I was over it..) I was/am surprised at how well L and I parent together. I can't believe they are only going to live here another 8y. OMG.

[bexincanada]

kona I hope O's appointments went well.

Is is 8 weeks old on Wednesday. Today we went to a friend's house who has a 3.5 month old and had a good visit. I timed it so she would sleep in the car (40 minutes each way) during her nap interval in hopes she wouldn't be as off as last night after our long drive home. She's gone the whole afternoon/night (2pm to now... 9:15) with only a 15 minute nap. I really hope we can get back to normal soon. Then again, what's normal? I'd settle for a good chunk of sleep tonight... the past few are catching up to me.

QOTW: Theoretically people tell you about the sleep deprivation but until you experience it. Also the love, same thing. I feel like when I hear the news and something has happened to a child it hits me in a different way. I also wouldn't have believed H. and I could have 5 minute conversation about poop that I would be fully engaged and interested in.

[kona]

Thanks for all of the well wishes for O. We didn't end up taking her in, the on call nurse thought it sounded like rosiola. Sure enough yesterday afternoon she got the rash. I had never heard of that virus before. She definitely turned a corner yesterday so I hoping she is much better today.

[karlamo]

Jul 19, 2016 5:07:32 GMT -5 kona said:

Thanks for all of the well wishes for O. We didn't end up taking her in, the on call nurse thought it sounded like rosiola. Sure enough yesterday afternoon she got the rash. I had never heard of that virus before. She definitely turned a corner yesterday so I hoping she is much better today.

There are like a billion childhood illnesses I have never heard of or that I thought only people from a Dickens novel got.  This is one of them.

[mahler5]

E is 6 weeks and C is 2 1/2.

E is doing great. Still not sleeping great but it could be a lot worse so I'm not going to complain. She is generally pretty chill although lately has gotten more fussy at night and then feeds constantly until she cries because she is too gassy or full but doesn't want to give up the boob. She's been smiling a lot too. I swear when I whipped out the boob tonight she gave it w huge smile! Probably just imagining things.

C is doing good overall. Her sleep has gone to hell a little bit. Really not bad but bad for her, which isn't fun when we have a newborn. She doesn't want to go to bed as early and gets up earlier. L has been getting up early with c and letting me sleep in some with e so that's good. Although I swear sometimes she wants a freaking medal. I'm like, yes I appreciate you doing this, but you do realize I get up 2-3 times a night to breast feed E. I would tree places in a second if L could breastfeed E. Im really going through a love/hate thing with breastfeeding right now. I love the bonding with E and think it is healthiest for her but I want to go back on my adhd meds. I also want to lose weight. And although breastfeeding should in theory facilitate that I swear I eat way worse and have way worse cravings when I breastfeed. Also I swear all the extra milk in my boobs just makes my back hurt more.

Anyway, back to C. She is still talking a ton. Almost nonstop at times. She is screaming a lot too. We are constantly reminding her to use her inside voice. It's mostly cute but can get a bit much. She is still crying like a baby and insisting on being picked up a lot but otherwise is adjusting to baby well. I still need to work with her to poop in potty more but she is generally good at peeing in potty.

She is so sweet and does a ton of sweet stuff daily but I'm too tired to tell you all much. She loves e, and always calls her "my baby". She did shove a spoon in her mouth the other day though. No food but scary so I am being more cautious with them both around each other. She also will want to grab her face sometimes. Not maliciously but I have to constantly remind her to be gentle. It's frustrating because I feel like she knows by now but still does it but I'm trying to give her benefit of the doubt. It's still adjustment for her.

Qotw- definitely didn't realize how bad sleep deprivation would be. I didn't think it would last as long or be as severe as it was. And like everyone else says wasn't prepared for the love. Also, lately I've felt like I can't believe how a kid can be so like me at times, but still different. It's awesome and scary at same time. Like I hope she doesn't have all my issues etc. also, I see how in many ways I am like my mom when I parent, which is weird.