TTMA Announcing at Work

[jillywilly]

Technically, my mom is my boss and my dad runs our company, so they already know. There's one other VP that I'll need to tell, which I'll do probably in a couple weeks assuming all goes well at our ultrasound tomorrow.

I think the best way to approach it, based on what I did last time, and how I had one of my my employees tell me about her pregnancy last year is to think through how it's going to effect your co-workers. Have an idea of how long you'll be gone, what you can do beforehand to make any transitions easier, etc. I was responsible for figuring out who was going to fill in my tasks while I was gone, so I already had a rough plan in place for what was going to happen when news went public last time, which I think was helpful as everyone kind of knew what to expect, and there was ample time to train, etc.

[callmeKD]

I'm going to tell my manager tomorrow. I wanted to wait longer but I've had a couple of things come up (emergency Appts etc) and I don't want them to think I'm being flakey. But I'm going to ask that he not say anything to HR yet.

[glb30]

Ah- it's crazy, but I can't even think about this without getting nervous. I just started my job 7/18. 😳

I honestly haven't thought about it. Every Time it kind of pops in my head, I decide to deal with it later on. I know I'll wait til at least 2nd trimester.

[mikaela20]

Well, I just excepted a new job at work in a different department. On my start date, I will be 13 weeks. I'm hoping to wait at least 2 weeks after starting the new gig to tell the new boss. I'm nervous about it. I really hope I dont show sooner so it gives me time at the new job before saying something.

[kaits8]

With DD I told my boss at 12 weeks, mostly because we're Facebook friends and we were preparing to announce on there. I see my coworkers only once or twice a year, so I could have waited much longer if it wasn't for social media.

This time, same company, different boss (my former boss's boss). He's great but we aren't as friendly (he's a a VP so it's a more professional relationship). I'll probably tell him around 12 weeks too so he doesn't find out elsewhere. I'm sure he will be happy for me but be thinking, "again!?". Time seems to pass faster when you don't see each other every day.

I see my coworkers in December so I want the word out by then so my huge belly isn't a surprise that I get to tell the same story about over and over and over again.

[jnnfrrose6]

For me, it's just been a closed door conversation with my boss. I let them know I'm pregnant and my EDD. That's usually it initially and there's follow up later about what that means for my leave and plans. This time, I've told a co-worker I'm close with already, but I'll wait a few more weeks to tell my boss, but I assume it'll be like the other times (each time has been a different boss but same company). I'm not as far along as most of you, though, so I could easily go another 6 weeks unless the nausea kicks in and I need to give her a heads up on it.

[glb30]

Also- what's it like in other professions? It's unspoken, but I get the impression that in law that it's not something your co-workers/bosses are thrilled about. I had a friend take paternity leave at my old job, and it became a huge joke. Also, I always felt that women lawyers who got pregnant early- and by early I mean anytime in their 20's, sort of had a harder time keeping up with people in the same graduating class.

I only waited til I was 30 to start trying (thank god, since I'll be 34 in October!) But, many of my friends are purposely waiting til 35+. People don't even blink that my husband and I have been married 8 years and have no kids- it's pretty normal. One woman lawyer told me that I was "smart to wait" and it would pay off dividends in my future- I'd had 2 losses at that point.

[muskiefan]

I had to let my co-workers know from the get-go. There is a teratogenic chemical I have to work with, but since I'm KU I can't. They had to know to cover those cases.

[erinshelley21]

I'm self-employed but have 2 coworkers who I have already told. One being my brother. I told him about a week after my BFP since we were driving somewhere together and I thought I was going to hurl. I told the other guy last week because we were talking about one of our busy times, which ends about 1 week before I'm due. DS came 4 weeks early, so I'm factoring that into my work plans.

[glb30]

renegadewhit your company sounds pretty progressive with the on-site day care and nice maternity leave available the day you start. I think you'll be good. 😊

[glb30]

. wow! That is an awesome policy they have for tenured teachers.

It would have been so annoying for people to be asking why we didn't have kids! Omg!

March to August is pretty awesome.

[mosdub]

*prior loss mentioned*

I told my work and students (I teach all grade levels) when I was 15 weeks last time. By then I had a normal looking ultrasound at 10 weeks and a normal sounding doppler at 15 weeks, I was starting to pop a little bit so I went for it. 5 weeks later they discovered the loss on our anatomy scan ultrasound and I had an emergency D&C. In a lot of ways it was nice to have the school community and families pull together for me. Amazing comforts and supports came from everywhere. One of the moms of my students wrote me an email and shared her history of losses with me and it was so nice to commiserate with her and connect with someone when I felt so alone. I'm really blessed.

That being said - DNW to have to deal with little kids knowing about my miscarriage again if I can. I had to deal with 5 year olds asking my why my baby died and sad looks from my high school students. And it wasn't like they forgot in a week. I totally had a kid bring it up A YEAR LATER by looking at me and saying "Hey Mrs.Dub...remember when your baby died?"

So, I think this time I'm going to just not tell the little kids until... well, until it's blatantly obvious and there is no way I can hide it. I will probably tell coworkers around 15-20 weeks again, once we get a healthy anatomy scan. I might tell the older kids then too, depending on everything.


ETA:  I told my principal when I was around 10 weeks, just so he knew before rumors, and I also confided in a couple of my close work friends. 

[glb30]

mosdub wow! That would be really hard. (((Hugs))) I know that makes it more nerve racking this time around too.

I don't have a similar experience, but I am also guarded about telling people due to prior losses. I'm just a little nervous to tell my colleagues TOO late and have scheduling issues, as I usually schedule 4-5 months out. I'm hoping to be close to 20 wks before saying anything.

[britab]

I'm a teacher. Last time I told my principal at 7 weeks because of MS.

When we go back I'll be about 12 weeks, so I'll tell before then. I don't want to email but my principal is So awkward.

I'll probably tell the kids when I know the sex. They are mostly K-1 students.

[meggypoo1]

I won't tell work until at least 12 weeks. As far as how. Probably just "I just wanted to let you know that I'm pregnant. I'm due at the end of March." That's all.

mosdub that's rough. I'm sorry you had to experience that.

[suelou18]

I have already told the management at work and that was at 7 weeks. It was earlier than I would have wanted. I figured it was better to explain what was going on than to suddenly not be at work for days on end with my morning sickness/exhaustion and why my productivity was not at its usual level. None of them were really surprised, so it was nice to have them know. I haven't told the rest of my co-workers, and am hoping to hold off a couple of more weeks until I am at least 12 weeks along to do so.

[sarahh]

**Loss mentioned**

My first pregnancy I didn't tell until I had a MMC. With Dylan, I waited until 12 weeks. This time I told only my boss when I was 7 weeks (or so I thought - ultrasound moved me back a week to 6 weeks) because I was having anxiety and had to move up my appointment. I do not plan on telling my other boss or any of the people that report to me until 12 week this time.

[callmeKD]

my manager was really supportive this morning when I told him. he basically said that there is nothing so important going on here (over the 7 months), ie that I shouldn't stress myself out at work.

[mikaela20]

You guys are making me nervous that so many have already told work. I need to hide this baby for a little bit so I don't feel like a jerk accepting this new job! Ah. Not looking forward to having this work conversation.

[callmeKD]

Aug 8, 2016 14:05:21 GMT -5 mikaela20 said:

You guys are making me nervous that so many have already told work. I need to hide this baby for a little bit so I don't feel like a jerk accepting this new job! Ah. Not looking forward to having this work conversation.

with DD I didn't tell work until 15 weeks. you have plenty of time.

[mosdub]

Aug 8, 2016 14:05:21 GMT -5 mikaela20 said:

You guys are making me nervous that so many have already told work. I need to hide this baby for a little bit so I don't feel like a jerk accepting this new job! Ah. Not looking forward to having this work conversation.

Duuude, I'll wait with you  I'm not telling anyone at work until 15 weeks maybe (unless M/S is still really bad and I have to run out of my classroom puking...kinda have to explain that I guess).  

[mbjune13]

mikaela20 Don't be nervous about waiting. With DD I didn't tell work until I was almost 20 weeks. This time I will try and hold out that long again. That gives them ample time to find my replacement.

[cosmicav]

I start school next week, at which point I'll be 12 weeks (omg). I think I'll probably tell people after my 12 week appointment on that Thursday.