Platonic Friend RANT

[yogini kiki]

It drives me insane when people comment on my being friends with members of the opposite sex as though I am being inappropriate just by nature of getting along with someone. Just because you can not be friends with a dude does not mean that I can't.  In fact, the fact that I am happily married with a child (as is my friend) makes it that much easier to bond quickly.

Not everything is about sex.

JFC.

RAGE.

[skylark002]

I am good friends with a lot of guys at work. We go out to eat together every day for lunch, but sometimes people are busy. A couple of times it has just been me and one other guy. I always think it's kind of weird, like a date. But there is no chemistry or flirtation with us.

[yogini kiki]

I guess I don't see gender as being all that relevant when friendship is concerned.

[minervamae]

I hate this about our society. Working in a male dominated field I run into this a lot. So many people get so weird about it I feel like I have to mention normal meetings to my husband, just so he's heard it from me and knows what's up. He's totally fine with it, but I don't ever want someone else to spin tales and cause him a moment of pain by making him doubt us.

[yogini kiki]

Feb 10, 2015 15:44:25 GMT -5 minervamae said:

I hate this about our society. Working in a male dominated field I run into this a lot. So many people get so weird about it I feel like I have to mention normal meetings to my husband, just so he's heard it from me and knows what's up. He's totally fine with it, but I don't ever want someone else to spin tales and cause him a moment of pain by making him doubt us.

THIS.  It drives me nuts....I mean....I have female roommates from college who are more of a sexual threat than all of my guy friends.  It just rubbed me the wrong way.

I told my boss I was heading out to lunch with my friend (who she doesnt know) and she was like...really?  Does Pat have a problem with that?

It makes me furious...I feel like that is a huge jump that says something about my character that I dont like.  

[blinkme182]

I've got several very close guy friends that I spend my time with. One of them used to work close by and we did lunch 3 times a week.
A rumor started at my office that I was meeting some guy on my lunches and I was cheating on my husband.

I was PISSED! HOW DARE these people say crap about me, and without knowing anything! I confronted the person who I believed started it. She denied saying anything, but I am still very sure it was her.

My H came in to visit me at work once and this chick brings up my friend like it is some secret.. She says, Oh your husband is here not GUY.
Fucking Bitch.
She thought she had something on me and it was nothing. I didn't even justify it to her.

My H and I, and GUY and his wife are all very close friends now. Our kids hang out. we know and spend time with each others families. he is one of my best friends. I hate that stupid Bitch for ever trying to make it out to be something bad!

//End Rant..
sorry-

I just hate that because I spent time with a guy at lunch it was assumed that something was up.

[yogini kiki]

blinkme182, this is exactly my point. So many of my guy friends are married to my girl friends or are friends with my husband....and even if they weren't, I am the girl they ask about weird stuff because there is no risk. I just get so mad. My husband knows the deal but it bothers me that people make such serious assumptions based on who I am eating lunch with.

[gingy]

Feb 10, 2015 15:46:47 GMT -5 yogini kiki said:

Feb 10, 2015 15:44:25 GMT -5 minervamae said:

I hate this about our society. Working in a male dominated field I run into this a lot. So many people get so weird about it I feel like I have to mention normal meetings to my husband, just so he's heard it from me and knows what's up. He's totally fine with it, but I don't ever want someone else to spin tales and cause him a moment of pain by making him doubt us.

THIS.  It drives me nuts....I mean....I have female roommates from college who are more of a sexual threat than all of my guy friends.  It just rubbed me the wrong way.

I told my boss I was heading out to lunch with my friend (who she doesnt know) and she was like...really?  Does Pat have a problem with that?

It makes me furious...I feel like that is a huge jump that says something about my character that I dont like.  

I think that says more about her relationship/character than yours. I'm thinking someone's projecting.

[yogini kiki]

Feb 10, 2015 15:54:11 GMT -5 gingy said:

Feb 10, 2015 15:46:47 GMT -5 yogini kiki said:

THIS.  It drives me nuts....I mean....I have female roommates from college who are more of a sexual threat than all of my guy friends.  It just rubbed me the wrong way.

I told my boss I was heading out to lunch with my friend (who she doesnt know) and she was like...really?  Does Pat have a problem with that?

It makes me furious...I feel like that is a huge jump that says something about my character that I dont like.  

I think that says more about her relationship/character than yours. I'm thinking someone's projecting.

She is totally projecting....but to say stuff like that in front of people that don't know me from Adam is obnoxious and the way she said it could hurt my reputation.  It was just strange...and really uncomfortable.

[mandapanda1382]

It's definitely a societal norm that people get uncomfortable with.

Personally I don't feel comfortable being one-on-one with a guy friend. Not because anything would happen, but appearances do matter.

But I couldn't care less how other people manage their male/female relationships.

[khopec]

I am still close friends with a guy from high school. There has never been anything physical between us. He is like a brother to me as we have known each other since we were 14. People always assume that at some point in our friendship we have "done" something...it's like it is so unbelieveable you can have a friendship with the opposite sex. I like to see I am not the only one that truly believes you can have friendships that cross gender lines.

Screw the judgers trying to start drama! yogini kiki, you should just throat punch your boss the next time you see her...

[Deleted]

ETA:  the boss I mean

[blinkme182]

Feb 10, 2015 15:56:48 GMT -5 yogini kiki said:

Feb 10, 2015 15:54:11 GMT -5 gingy said:

I think that says more about her relationship/character than yours. I'm thinking someone's projecting.

She is totally projecting....but to say stuff like that in front of people that don't know me from Adam is obnoxious and the way she said it could hurt my reputation.  It was just strange...and really uncomfortable.

That makes me ragey-

What is the purpose of this!  Throat-Punch

[blinkme182]

Feb 10, 2015 15:53:49 GMT -5 yogini kiki said:

blinkme182, this is exactly my point. So many of my guy friends are married to my girl friends or are friends with my husband....and even if they weren't, I am the girl they ask about weird stuff because there is no risk. I just get so mad. My husband knows the deal but it bothers me that people make such serious assumptions based on who I am eating lunch with.

It is the seriousness of their assumption. It isn't that I'm going out to lunch, but the implication that I'm cheating on my S/O. 

[bobloblaw]

Feb 10, 2015 15:56:48 GMT -5 yogini kiki said:

Feb 10, 2015 15:54:11 GMT -5 gingy said:

I think that says more about her relationship/character than yours. I'm thinking someone's projecting.

She is totally projecting....but to say stuff like that in front of people that don't know me from Adam is obnoxious and the way she said it could hurt my reputation.  It was just strange...and really uncomfortable.

That's just wrong.

I'm totally up front with H about any of my meeting up with friends, male or female and he also has met them, just as I have met and know about his female friends. I dislike when people insinuate it's sneaking around. It's totally projecting.

Just because some people can't control themselves doesn't mean others can't.

[sweeetp812]

Feb 10, 2015 15:25:49 GMT -5 yogini kiki said:

It drives me insane when people comment on my being friends with members of the opposite sex as though I am being inappropriate just by nature of getting along with someone. Just because you can not be friends with a dude does not mean that I can't.  In fact, the fact that I am happily married with a child (as is my friend) makes it that much easier to bond quickly.

Not everything is about sex.

JFC.

RAGE.

Have the same situation. Brush it off. Small minded people and all

[redhorizon343]

Feb 10, 2015 15:54:11 GMT -5 gingy said:

Feb 10, 2015 15:46:47 GMT -5 yogini kiki said:

THIS.  It drives me nuts....I mean....I have female roommates from college who are more of a sexual threat than all of my guy friends.  It just rubbed me the wrong way.

I told my boss I was heading out to lunch with my friend (who she doesnt know) and she was like...really?  Does Pat have a problem with that?

It makes me furious...I feel like that is a huge jump that says something about my character that I dont like.  

I think that says more about her relationship/character than yours. I'm thinking someone's projecting.

I came here to say this! Don't take it personally, it's about her, not you.