Am I doing this right?

[packmomma]

Tl: dr when does bf get easier?

I just went to a LLL meeting and my kid is 13 months old. The leader just kept telling the new mom's that it gets easier. And I just kept thinking "when?" We've always had trouble with latching, biting, sore nipples, supply, not to mention my ptsd gives me panic attacks when we nurse sometimes. And I'm just wondering when it gets easier? I feel like we must be doing it wrong. DS is super attached and I like bf more than I struggle with it. But it's been so hard for me. Does anyone have similiar experiences? Because all I hear around me is that when they reach x age it just gets super easy and that's never been the case for us.

[emmyg65]

It generally gets easier around 6 weeks, but not for everyone. My BFing relationship was very up and down—poor latch and big weight loss at first, terrible engorgement that I had to rent an emergency pump to relieve, serious nipple damage, followed by thrush. And then an easy month before I went back to work and began pumping and all that stress, followed by supply issues. When my son weaned himself at 16 months, I was simultaneously heartbroken and tremendously relieved. When I was actually nursing, I loved it (yay, oxytocin!) but god, it was hard. That's why I'm still involved with this board to help support other moms.

[vvvvvfee]

RE what you said in the extended BFing thread about LO wanting constant, short nursing sessions-- it's ok to set limits with your nursing toddler! at this age, nursing is a relationship with give and take- not a dictatorship run by your toddler.

you don't have to worry about nursing LO for his sole nutrition anymore- so you don't have to worry about supply. if you can cut back on nursing sessions you will probably have a better time with sore nipples. with sloppy latch/biting- my kids both tended to do this when they were getting new teeth- experiment with different positions, or just straight-up end the nursing session if LO starts biting.

for me BFing has been way easier after 1 year because a lot of the pressure is off and you don't have to pump anymore. but if you're finding it stresses you out, you can always set limits (# of sessions per day, session length, firm rules about biting), or if that doesn't help, of course it's okay to think about weaning.

hugs! i hope things get easier for you.

[packmomma]

Thanks for the support /replies guys. I found myself tearing up at the meeting and just wondering why it was/is so hard for us and then just feeling like I'm failing at it. I'm definitely going to make it not so intense and let ds know I have limits to it. Hopefully that helps.

[sandandsea]

Oct 12, 2016 8:50:25 GMT -5 packmomma said:

Thanks for the support /replies guys. I found myself tearing up at the meeting and just wondering why it was/is so hard for us and then just feeling like I'm failing at it. I'm definitely going to make it not so intense and let ds know I have limits to it. Hopefully that helps.

You've made it 13 months!! You're amazing! Many people have 1 year as their big hairy amazing if I make it goal and you've blown by that!

[shadylady]

Of course you haven't failed at it! You've made it 13 months, even though it has been a difficult road. Yes, BF is easier for some moms/babies than others. It's been hard for you, and that's OK. You should be proud.

[shellyr]

packmomma, you have done an awesome job and you haven't failed!

[packmomma]

Thanks guys. It's been rough and I just felt like it was supposed to be this easy thing by now. Thanks for the support and stories. It feels better knowing I'm not the only one not enjoying it all the time (while still wanting to continue).

[sunfrogger88]

packmomma just checking in on you to how you're doing. ❤

[packmomma]

Oct 26, 2016 14:22:47 GMT -5 sunfrogger88 said:

packmomma just checking in on you to how you're doing. ❤

We're doing okay. He's got his first big cold right now so he's feeding a lot but it's gotten way easier knowing that I don't have to enjoy every moment of this. That it can be a struggle and I can still want to continue even if I don't like it.
I told a friend that ds loves nursing and I don't hate it. Right now that's enough for us.
The last two weeks he's been so sick and hasn't wanted to eat solids as much so I've really been thankful that we're bf because I know he's hydrated and getting enough calories. And that's one less worry. With also sick kid I will take one less worry. Thank you for checking in! And thank you guys for all your support.