PGAL/PAIF Check-In (11/15)

[caer]

Pregnant After Loss / Pregnant After Infertility (PGAL/PAIF) check-in is posted once a week (generally on a Monday) for those of us who have unfortunately experienced a loss or a history of infertility and are now pregnant. Anyone who participates may start the thread each week.

Out of respect to all the ladies here, please add a trigger warning or spoiler if you decide to talk about any living children.

PGAL Mantras

SPOILER: Click to show

Today I am pregnant and I love my baby.



I am pregnant until someone tells me otherwise.



My past does not dictate my future. A previous m/c does not mean I will have another m/c.



Just because something sad is happening to another poster, does not mean it will happen to you. We all know m/c and complications are not contagious!



Hope does not make bad things happen" You cannot jinx your pregnancy by creating a ticker, getting excited, or telling someone. Live in the positive!



There is nothing I can do to prevent a m/c from happening. Worrying yourself sick doesn't prevent a m/c. And if (God forbid) it were to happen again, I know I will survive"

How far along are you?

How are you doing Physically/Emotionally?

Any upcoming appointments or tests?

Updates/Questions/Rants/Raves:

GTKY: Do people IRL know about your IF/loss? Are you open about your struggles or do you prefer to keep it private?

[madameovary]

21 weeks and some days here. A/S a couple of weeks went very well. I started washing some of the clothes I've gotten for her so that's fun.

I try to be pretty open in person, but don't post much about anything on facebook. I'm pretty big into privacy for my entire family.

How's everyone? Have we all had our A/S?

[mosdub]

How far along are you? 20 weeks

How are you doing Physically/Emotionally? Physically pretty good. Slightly more achy and sore, slightly more tired but overall okay. Emotionally I'm apprehensive an excited about my anatomy scan tomorrow. My Mom and H are both coming. I've been feeling lots of movement which has been such a blessing of reassurance, but still nervous something might be wrong at the A/S.

Any upcoming appointments or tests? Anatomy scan tomorrow

Updates/Questions/Rants/Raves: nope!

GTKY: Do people IRL know about your IF/loss? Are you open about your struggles or do you prefer to keep it private? I had a few people ask me if I was excited about my A/S tomorrow and I said "yeah, but I'm still kind of nervous too". Both of them said "well you're kind of out of the danger zone now!" and I said "yeah, I suppose but I went to 20 weeks last time so I'll feel a lot better making this milestone." They both seemed surprised like they didn't know I was that far along last time. It was all pleasant conversation, but I thought it was interesting. Also SEVERAL people told me I'm popping like crazy which I am not seeing haha, I feel like I look the same as I looked a couple weeks ago. I'm pretty open about my loss, but I was kind of forced to be open about it. I never had the option to keep it personal.

[caer]

Glad your A/S went well madameovary! And that's exciting about washing little clothes.

I'll be thinking of you tomorrow mosdub. Sending you many good vibes for your A/S.

[caer]

How far along are you? 20w5d

How are you doing Physically/Emotionally? Physically I feel really good. Emotionally, I'm struggling with anxiety about my A/S tomorrow.

Any upcoming appointments or tests? A/S is tomorrow.

Updates/Questions/Rants/Raves: DH is coming with me tomorrow and he keeps saying how excited he is to see the baby. I wish I was more excited. I just really, really hate ultrasounds and can't wait until it's over. I hate being so down about it but that's how I'm feeling.

GTKY: Do people IRL know about your IF/loss? Are you open about your struggles or do you prefer to keep it private?
All my closest friends and family know about our IF/loss. My SIL and BFF both struggled with IF and I have another good friend who had a couple of losses and went through IF treatments. So I'm lucky to have people who "get" it, although I obviously wouldn't wish it on anyone!

[mosdub]

Thinking of you tomorrow too caer

[skk]

madameovary How fun to be washing clothes already! I wish I was at that point. I'm still trying to figure out where we'll put this baby's stuff so I haven't gotten much yet.

mosdub and caer Sending good thoughts for your scans tomorrow.

[skk]

How far along are you?
21w4d

How are you doing Physically/Emotionally?
Sciatica is still acting up, but I got a standing desk at work and that's helped a bit. Emotionally I'm doing okay. It helps put my mind at ease now that I can feel more movement.

Any upcoming appointments or tests?
OB check on Thursday, Echo u/s and endo next Monday

Updates/Questions/Rants/Raves:
I'm feeling unprepared for this baby. We still need to work out space logistics for a new dresser, etc. and it's stressful. I know it'll all work out in the end, but I keep wishing for a bigger home (and it's not likely anytime soon).

GTKY: Do people IRL know about your IF/loss? Are you open about your struggles or do you prefer to keep it private?
I'm more open about it now that some time has passed. It was never a secret, but more people found out than I had anticipated telling at the time.

[madameovary]

Nov 15, 2016 18:05:43 GMT -5 skk said:

madameovary How fun to be washing clothes already! I wish I was at that point. I'm still trying to figure out where we'll put this baby's stuff so I haven't gotten much yet.

mosdub and caer Sending good thoughts for your scans tomorrow.

We use free and clear detergent anyway x so just an outfit here and there. Right now all clothes are in vacuum pack bags according to size, sitting in pack n play. We are having some furniture delivered in a couple of weeks so I can start putting the smaller sizes away.


Good luck caer and mosdub!!!!

[mosdub]

skk we are working with a small space for our nursery too - I've been putting together as many ideas as I can to best utilize space.

[glb30]

mosdub I'll be thinking of you tomorrow!

caer thinking of you too! It's okay to not be super excited.

skk I'm glad the standing desk is helping.

[glb30]

How far along are you? 22+3

How are you doing? Physically and emotionally good this week. I feel a lot of movement, which is helping. Today, I haven't felt anything since this AM though, so I could see how this could turn to anxiety quickly. I've been super busy today, so I haven't thought about it, but if I don't feel movement when I get on the couch later, I'll probably freak out.

Any upcoming appointments? Next week, regular OB.

Updates: Not really. We honestly haven't done anything. I need to figure out childcare, and do our registry soon.

GTKY: My close friends and family know. And I'll tell other people if it comes up- it's not a secret, I just don't want to bring people down with it. I've never posted anything on social media or anything.

[caer]

I'm sorry you're feeling unprepared skk. Remember babies don't need much in the beginning and it will all come together. I hope your appointments go well on Thursday and Monday.

I hope you get some good movement soon glb30. I find drinking some juice or eating some candy usually helps.

[glb30]

caer she woke up as soon as I sat down for dinner!

[caer]

Nov 15, 2016 20:36:11 GMT -5 glb30 said:

caer she woke up as soon as I sat down for dinner!

Yay! Great update. 😊