This ones for you @jemomma. When Owen was 2 1/2 it was a full nightmare getting him to wear snowsuit and jacket and he told us all he needed was underwear so we let him go outside that way. That's me in my pajamas😛 Edit poof
Post by pghtruelove on Dec 9, 2016 10:28:56 GMT -5
I went out last night with some friends, so this morning when J woke up I put my iPad in the crib with her and I got to sleep for 2 extra hours. Yay for iPad parenting.
Mine is lame, but I've never been to Panera before. I'm meeting someone there tonight and it will be my first time.
I'm going out for dinner tonight with my mom, sister, and will have DS in tow and was just wondering if I could get them on board for some Panera. Jealous!
Post by periwinkledaydreams on Dec 9, 2016 12:38:45 GMT -5
badwolf, I sent out Js baby shower thank you's around the same time we did 1st bday party invites. Life gets busy, theres more important things than thank you cards. Ive never noticed if Ive ever not gotten one from someone.
Then again I can also confess, Ive been to multiple weddings where I didn't bring a gift. Thats probably going to get me some flames as well. Etiquette is clearly not my thing.
Post by periwinkledaydreams on Dec 9, 2016 12:44:35 GMT -5
My confession is, my house is disgusting right now. Particularly my kitchen. Because I have officially gone on a cleaning strike.
Since I started working full time, I keep trying to drive the point home to SO (through conversation) that since we're both now at work and at home for exactly the same number of hours, all of the house things that need to get done, that I used to do during the day when I was home, now need to be split up.
Clearly thats not happening, so I've gone on strike. The sink is literally overflowing with dishes, I can barely look at it, but I'm not cooking another meal and then cleaning up after it (except for J obvs) until the message has been received.
Hold my hand please. I almost just caved and washed the dishes.
My confession is, my house is disgusting right now. Particularly my kitchen. Because I have officially gone on a cleaning strike.
Since I started working full time, I keep trying to drive the point home to SO (through conversation) that since we're both now at work and at home for exactly the same number of hours, all of the house things that need to get done, that I used to do during the day when I was home, now need to be split up.
Clearly thats not happening, so I've gone on strike. The sink is literally overflowing with dishes, I can barely look at it, but I'm not cooking another meal and then cleaning up after it (except for J obvs) until the message has been received.
Hold my hand please. I almost just caved and washed the dishes.
Do you think he will care? Does he even see the mess?
I'm hoping he'll notice when theres nothing to eat and no pans to cook with?
I know this is a dramatic and passive aggressive tactic here, and likely only driving myself crazy, but Ive legit run out of time to do all the things and I'm not staying up late/waking up early to clean when no one is helping me.
Post by periwinkledaydreams on Dec 9, 2016 12:54:53 GMT -5
Yea I know the no wedding gift thing is highly flammable. The instances were very particular in that my friends would rather have had me at their wedding than have me not go because I couldn't bring a gift.
I did send something at a later date, to be clear.
periwinkledaydreams, etiquette says a year. I posted here that I was coming up on a year of being in a good friend's wedding (in which I spent a TON of money on a dress/hair/makeup/destination bachelorette, etc) and hadn't yet purchased a gift. The year has now lapsed and I still haven't sent a gift. Their wedding card is sitting in our junk drawer and it says "Just Married" on it. I still plan on sending a check with that card one of these days and I hope she will laugh at the "just married" part and forgive that I'm so late.
Is this where I confess that I had an excel spreadsheet and know who did and did not give us a gift at our wedding? I honestly have no idea who it was anymore and the spreadsheet tracked a lot more than that, but I did take note.
Is this where I confess that I had an excel spreadsheet and know who did and did not give us a gift at our wedding? I honestly have no idea who it was anymore and the spreadsheet tracked a lot more than that, but I did take note.
+1 but created to track addresses and thank you notes. After the wedding it was just kind of "huh those 5 people didn't send a gift I guess" with a shoulder shrug.
Yep, I still have my list (although it's hand written). My mom has asked me to check the list to find out how much certain people gave, so she could make sure not to give their kids any less.
+1 but created to track addresses and thank you notes. After the wedding it was just kind of "huh those 5 people didn't send a gift I guess" with a shoulder shrug.
Yep, I still have my list (although it's hand written). My mom has asked me to check the list to find out how much certain people gave, so she could make sure not to give their kids any less.
Wait, what? Are you saying here she asks what you got as gifts to make sure she gives enough to other people?
beersandweirs i am so sorry you are feeling that way. You are gorgeous AND A GOOD PERSON(I feel this is a much more important quality). Your DD is beautiful and I am sure you will raise her to be beautiful inside as well.
That actually made me tear up, thank you for saying that. That's probably more so what I should be concerned about, raising her to know being a good person is what matters.
Is this where I confess that I had an excel spreadsheet and know who did and did not give us a gift at our wedding? I honestly have no idea who it was anymore and the spreadsheet tracked a lot more than that, but I did take note.
+1 but created to track addresses and thank you notes. After the wedding it was just kind of "huh those 5 people didn't send a gift I guess" with a shoulder shrug.
Yep. That's exactly what mine was for - I only wrote gifts down to make sure a thank you was sent.
Yep, I still have my list (although it's hand written). My mom has asked me to check the list to find out how much certain people gave, so she could make sure not to give their kids any less.
Wait, what? Are you saying here she asks what you got as gifts to make sure she gives enough to other people?
Yes. To make sure she's giving an appropriate amount, she's not comparing who gave what.
Yep, I still have my list (although it's hand written). My mom has asked me to check the list to find out how much certain people gave, so she could make sure not to give their kids any less.
Wait, what? Are you saying here she asks what you got as gifts to make sure she gives enough to other people?
My in laws do this, its not for me. Tracking gifts just feels against the spirit of giving
Yes. To make sure she's giving an appropriate amount, she's not comparing who gave what.
so if someone didn't give you anything she wouldn't get them anything?
This is what I was trying to get my head around. Like I have my standard amount I give at pretty much every wedding. I can't get my head around someone being like "but I'll give them (more/less/whatever) because what they gave". Or the other side, someone going to their parent and being like "what did you give at so n sos wedding, omg they gave me less!" Lol what?
Yes. To make sure she's giving an appropriate amount, she's not comparing who gave what.
so if someone didn't give you anything she wouldn't get them anything?
No, as I explained in my first response it's to make sure she wasn't giving less. And just to get a general idea of what was a good amount to give a niece/nephew for example. I totally get it, she was using it as a guide for herself as to what other people are giving. My mom is like the sweetest person ever, she was asking from a good place, not a selfish penny-counter who wanted to make sure she wasn't giving people stuff they didn't deserve.
so if someone didn't give you anything she wouldn't get them anything?
This is what I was trying to get my head around. Like I have my standard amount I give at pretty much every wedding. I can't get my head around someone being like "but I'll give them (more/less/whatever) because what they gave". Or the other side, someone going to their parent and being like "what did you give at so n sos wedding, omg they gave me less!" Lol what?
Totally not like that. FWIW I don't have a standard amount I give at weddings. It really depends on the person and how well I know them. And sometimes we just can't afford as much as other times.
Post by wegrowsheep on Dec 9, 2016 15:54:42 GMT -5
periwinkledaydreams Stay strong. I hate feeling like the hired help. I have told my husband more than once that the dishes are not being done by me, and there will be no sex unless the kitchen is clean.
Here's my list of confessions:
I've been absent a lot from here, for no particular reason, other than T screaming at me when I use my phone.
I've been wearing this pair of leggings for more than 24 hours.
I yelled at DS1 this morning and told him I'm not his slave and stop complaining or he wouldn't get breakfast.
I'm considering not giving 3 of my nieces anything for Christmas because their parents can't be troubled to come to any family gatherings that we attend. Haven't seen them since August, might not see them til Easter at this rate. They live less than 90 minutes away. They go to her parents' house for every holiday.
Post by periwinkledaydreams on Dec 9, 2016 16:05:01 GMT -5
wegrowsheep thanks, solidarity. I get to his clothes while folding laundry and throw them back in unfolded. Mine and LOs things get folded and out away, and his sit there wrinkled in the basket. I know its petty and usually Id fold the whole damn basket but Im just not doing anything until Im not doing EVERYTHING!
Oh yea ETA, it sucks your family (brother? SIL?) hasn't made time to visit, but Id still give the kids gifts. It ain't their fault!
Oh right, also.. I need to try to follow through with the no sex til the kitchens clean. I always cave and bone anyways, I have no will power in that arena!
Post by periwinkledaydreams on Dec 9, 2016 16:35:51 GMT -5
budders I hope you don't let that consume you! There are much much more terrible young and stupid things! I try not to look back at that time period for any reason other than what NOT to do ever again lol!
I was in a wedding and didn't give a gift - I was in graduate school and not working and had paid for my dress, shoes, hair, a shower gift, bachelorette party, and also charged a hotel room to my CC because the bride wanted us all to stay there (even though it was in Pittsburgh). After the wedding, the bride & groom ghosted me and I haven't heard from them in over five years. I'll always think it was because we didn't give a gift. I had every intention of giving one eventually! I'm kind of glad I didn't give them anything given how they both treated me.
Also, I take LO out in her car seat safe jacket and sometimes wrap a blanket around her. We're running in and out of a heated car to a heated store and I don't see the point of sticking a heavy coat on her for the less than a minute walk in and out.
I do keep her heavy coat in my car in case of an emergency, though.
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