So I'm still laying in bed while DH is of at church and was thinking maybe we could share a bit about our religious backgrounds? I know we've touched on it here and there but idk if there's been an actual thread?
I know you're not supposed to talk religion or politics, but I think we can all behave.
Do you bring/plan on bringing your children to church?
I was baptized but never attended church growing up. DH was raised Catholic but converted to Lutheran. He's much more religious than I am, but sometimes I'll go to church with him. I like the community of it, and I'd like to be more faithful, but it's difficult for me. I'm kind of a cynical, skeptical person in that regard. We'll be having the baby baptized at our Lutheran church.
I grew up literally right beside a Methodist Church but my parents never took us as kids. Fast forward to when my parents divorced and my dad remarried when I was around 11 years old- he married a very strong Baptist woman. So we started going to church. At that age going to church after never going and being in Sunday school made me very nervous and anxious because I knew NOTHING about the bible, etc. I did however enjoy the regular church service. I was baptized at age 12. Dad and his wife divorced and we stopped going to church.
My dad and I have the same views on religion. We full heartedly believe and are Christians but we don't feel like we should be pressured to attend church. It doesn't make me any less a believer if I don't go every Sunday or only go once a month, etc.
The last 2 years I have become much more in tune with my Faith and go to church occasionally. I read the bible frequently at home and find myself in prayer and giving thanks just about every day. I would like to take my children to church but I also want them to find their faith and relationship with God on their own. I never want to pressure them. We just need to find a church once we move in a month.
Post by lauranicole91 on Feb 15, 2015 9:38:59 GMT -5
I grew up Catholic. Like went to catholic school. My dad was a member of an organization the church had. We were at lots of functions and what not. But when we moved from CA to NC and had to join a new (way bigger) church. It felt so impersonal so we slowly stopped going. I was 15 at the time so I just kind of starting questioning my beliefs in general. So I label myself as somewhere between agnostic and atheist. I go back and forth.
DH grew up southern baptist but started questioning his beliefs around the time I did. He labels himself as agnostic, not atheist.
A year and a half ago we joined a Unitarian church because we both missed that community feel. We both grew up with church and its activities as a big part of our lives and we hated that our daughter was going to be lacking so to speak. The Unitarian church is an all inclusive kinda place and it focuses on current events and just being a good person vs the bible and God and stuff. It was really awesome. But we moved and now the church is over an hour away. We just can't justify that drive once a week. And it's literally the only one.
SO and I are both nondenominational Christian. Our children will be raised that way until they are old enough to make their own decisions about it. We also aren't strict though. We believe in God, and we pray, but we don't go to church because we haven't found one that we like yet.
H and I are not religious but my parents and sisters are. I'm sure they will take LO to church with them occasionally and I'm fine with that. I grew up in the church and still formed my own opinions and I will trust LO to do the same. If he decides when he's older he wants to go to church every Sunday either with my parents or someone else or even alone we will make that happen but I don't ever see myself attending church again.
I was brought up Pentecostal Christian. DH was brought up Catholic and has converted to Pentecostal Christian. Our children are raised Pentecostal Christian and I trust they will make their own decisions when they grow older as well.
Post by orangepickle on Feb 15, 2015 10:08:39 GMT -5
I'm not religious and was not raised with religion as a part of my life. My dad went through phases of religion when I was a kid, he was Mormon for about a year and tried out a few Protestant churches, but my mom didn't let him indoctrinate me or my sister because he was doing it for the wrong reasons. One Christmas, my mom agreed to take us to a non denominational service on the navy base, but I passed out in the middle of it (didn't know I was epileptic at the time) and when I woke up, my "hilarious" older sister told me it was because God hated me
I did marry a Catholic but he hasn't been to church in several years so I doubt LO will have much religion in their life either.
I was raised Catholic. I don't attend church very frequently, however my 11yo and my dad go every single Sunday. He is very close to God and it actually makes me want to participate more. I'm really happy my 11yo chooses to go and loves it.
Post by snapdragon on Feb 15, 2015 10:43:02 GMT -5
Oh boy, my favorite subject! I'll keep it to the question though because I've already talked about my religious beliefs on here so much. Do you bring/plan on bringing your children to church?
Because religion is so involved in the minutiae of our everyday lives, the weekly trek to synagogue isn't the focus and isn't super important to me. H goes to synagogue twice a day every day (really three times, but the afternoon and evening service are usually put together for convenience), but the most women tend to go is once a week on Saturday (because for women, praying at a synagogue is optional, but for men it's mandatory). I used to go every Saturday, but since I had DD 3.5 years ago, I never go unless it's just to arrive at the end of services and chat with my friends afterward. I don't intend to take my children to synagogue until they're old enough to actually participate in meaningful prayer. There are many people in my community who take their LO's with them from the time they're little because they think it's beneficial, or maybe to get them accustomed to it, and there are other people who come and drop their kids off at babysitting while they go to services. Neither of those options is something I want to do. I feel like the synagogue is for prayer, and I won't be able to concentrate when my children are toddlers/babies, and I think they'll distract people around me too. I also don't want them to think of the synagogue as a place to play and run around. I want them to go when they're old enough to understand that it's a serious, holy place.
Once they're old enough that it's appropriate, we'll take our kids every week, and they'll have services every morning at school. (I will likely let my girls pray at home if the weather is nasty, because it's a 15 minute walk and we don't drive on Saturdays.) If and when I have boys, they'll go with H daily to afternoon/evening services starting at least at age 13, if not earlier.
Post by linegirl313 on Feb 15, 2015 11:11:28 GMT -5
I am a practicing Catholic. DH is atheist but comes with me from time to time. Our children will be raised Catholic but will be given the chance to walk away when they're older. Our deal is that I am allowed to raise them as Catholic and he is allowed to raise them as Yankee fans.
Post by nurserachel22 on Feb 15, 2015 11:50:29 GMT -5
I am a Baptist Christian. My Fiancé has not been baptized, but after a bad place in our relationship, we started going to church regularly together. I am not pushing him to become baptized, but I would like him to if he ever feels ready! We enjoy church and have been learning a lot. Our daughter will be baptized as a baby and brought up Baptist Christian.
I am trying to become more involved in church... I want to learn more about the Bible so I can help my daughter learn too.
I grew up Baptist- we went to our family church regularly until shortly after my grandmother passed away when I was 5. Even then, if I'm rembering correctly our church had kept the schedule of their farming ancestors of 1st and 3rd Sunday's only. After that we went off and on- Pastor's anniversary, church anniversary, or mother's day, etc.
When I was able to drive I started going to Youth group, then Sunday School and church at a traditionally white baptist church in our area, eventually being baptized there. I thought one of my aunts was going to have a heart attack, lol, but this was still the beginnings of the South with many bad interactions between whites/blacks especially for the neighborhood where the church is. Somewhere in college I realized how hypocritical I was of "non-believers", not really living a life that was christ-like in my yolerance/forgiveness, and slowly drifted away from the Church. I still regularly read my bible and believe; however I also like the balance in my life now.
For this LO, I plan on leaving the ultimate decision up to her when the time is right just like my parents did for me. I do plan on making sure she knows that I believe in God and has exposure to the Bible/praying.
DH and I attend a local community church (nondenominational) and are relatively active in terms of attendance, small group participation, community service and what not. DH was raised Catholic and I grew up in a baptist church, but was attending a community church regularly when we met. We both wanted to be on the same page with our faith well before we actually tied the knot for the sake of it not being an"divider" for us later, and I am tremendously thankful for the time we took to slog though were we both stood on a lot of things first.....especially before having kids. In the end, we agreed that the "guts"'of our faith are Christ centered and that we were committed to navigating our own relationships with God individually and as a part of our marriage. DH is comfortable in the Catholic Church and his family is still very active, though he shared early on when we met that he had more questions than answers to a lot of doctrinal things he grew up learning. I hate to say he "converted" since he had no animosity toward the church, but he's since decided he has a greater connection to our current church in terms of it reflecting what he understands about biblical teaching on grace, salvation, etc.
DS is taught about Jesus and (hopefully) we are parenting him in a "Godly way" though have mercy do we miss the mark at times (a lot)! We practice believer's baptism (vs. infant baptism) so that's a choice our kids will make themselves when they're ready if they so choose. We did have DS dedicated and will do the same with DD, but that's more a reflection of our commitment as parents to raise them to know Jesus rather than a reference to their "final destination " or whatever.
My perspective? The "God tent" is a big one where many may have disagreements but all are welcome, provided there is consistency on the "tent poles" meaning the key elements: who God is, the role of the Bible as God's written word, the need for grace, etc. We are all works in progress and are at different places in our faith relationships, but so long as the goal is to seek and be open to what comes before us with humble, loving hearts I think that's what God desires from us first......just my two cent response!
BFP #1 7/07/11 ~ Due Date 3/18/12 ~ MMC Dx 8/17/12 (at 9wks) BFP #2 10/30/11 ~ Due Date 7/9/12 ~ DS born 7/10/12 BFP #3 1/07/14 ~ Due Date 9/19/14 ~ MMC Dx 2/14/14 (at 8wks) BFP #4 8/25/14 ~ Due Date 5/2/15 ~ DD born 5/7/15
I am Catholic. I think the community aspect of religious life is super important. My parents, sister, nieces and I attend weekly services at the church we were raised in. Like I was baptized, received all my sacraments and was even married there. My nieces attend weekly services and so will my LO.
DH is also Catholic, but does not attend church. I keep inviting him but he declines. My brother in law attends when he is off.
My belief is that I have a moral obligation to introduce my children to God and religious life. Once they are over 18 and off in College they can make whatever decision they want with respect to religion. Thats how my parents did it and I respect that. We all received our sacraments but now I have 2 sisters who are total non believers and that is ok in our house.
I was raised Catholic, but I left the church before entering college. In college, I joined a non-denominational Christian group, and when my husband and I got married, our non-denominational pastor is the one who married us. My husband and I consider ourselves non-denominational Christians. My mother left the Catholic church last year and joined a very strict (and bigoted) Christian-affiliated cult and now is constantly hounding me to convert to her new church (spoiler: not gonna happen). We plan to raise our baby (and future LOs) as non-denominational and loving to all people. And far, far, FAR away from my mother.
I consider myself "religious" with strong Buddhist inclination. I believe all religions have value and meaning if you can open your mind enough to see it. H and I both come from Catholic roots but have never practiced. I don't think he's ever even been to church (really, ever). I've been to lots of different Christian church services and have studied the Bible. I'm thinking of baptizing my baby because I think it's an important cultural tradition. However, I will not raise them to believe in any specific faith.
lauranicole91: We go to a Unitarian church too, and they are hard to find! Especially we live near the city so there are a couple there, but we drive 30 minutes to ours. We looked near my parents house and we have to drive the 2 hours back to ours.
My family went to a Baptist church as a kid, but I wouldn't say we were "raised Baptist". My parents went to that church because my grandparents went to that church, but it was a very conservative church and my parents were always pretty clear that they didn't agree with everything. I stopped going to church as an adult until after we had DD.
DH was raised Catholic. His dad's family is Catholic and his mom's is Presbyterian. He still considers himself Catholic but disagrees with so much about the Catholic church. He stopped going except for holidays in college.
After we had DD, DH wanted to get her baptized but his priest was really difficult about us not being married. We never ended up doing it because of that. I get their beliefs but he told DH that we either needed to get married or he needed to move out. I don't understand the thinking that DD would be better off without both parents in her house because they aren't married.
After DD we went to Catholic church every now and then on some holidays when DH wanted to go. We also went to a non denominational Christian church a few times that my family attends now (when we were visiting, not on a regular basis), and she attended both the Presbyterian church that DH's mom is a member of, and the Lutheran church that his step-dad is when they had her for the day. When she got older and started asking about church I started researching to find a church I would be comfortable taking her to regularly. We ended up at a Unitarian church because I want her to learn about a variety of religions and make a decision for herself when she's ready. She loves going, and we feel very comfortable there. The religious education program (Sunday school) is amazing. Most people there do consider themselves Christian but they talk about other religions too and DD has learned a lot. DH wishes it was a little more formal and ceremonial (I think because that's just what he's used to coming from a Catholic church), but he still feels comfortable there, and I love it!
Post by littlecookie on Feb 15, 2015 15:08:06 GMT -5
We were both raised in southern black baptist churches (not nearly as rigid or rules oriented than what I know of other southern baptist churches)
We were married in and were active at service and volunteering at the church he grew up in until about two years ago. Our son would not stay in the nursery and it was really hard for us to concentrate with him in service so we weren't going as much. His parents started going to a multi cultural non denominational church close to their house (the other church was far away from both of us really). They have an evening service on Saturdays that worked a lot better for us. The church is very mission focused which we also like. We're just now starting to volunteer, but go most weekends. DS loves the children's worship and the youth programs are awesome.
DS also goes to a church daycare/preschool and now that he's a "big kid" he goes to chapel a few times a week. He also sees us praying and reading the Bible at home and will read him Bible stories if he asks us.
DH and I both grew up going to and being active in church. Now we are both non-believers and don't attend. Both of our mothers are pretty religious. Not really sure how it's all going to pan out with the baby because I know they'll want him to be baptized but we'll see. Of course he will be free to practice or not practice whatever religion he chooses.
It's nice to see so many people are willing to let their children choose their own religious preferences when they get older. I think that is definitely a change from the past.
H and I grew up in the same Reformed Church. It's very conservative and restrictive, we both left after high school.
We moved away and when we came back home we started attending again. We tried to get connected, but never felt welcomed or at home. We have since started attending a Lutheran Church that we both really like. We mainly watch the service streaming live because DD hated the nursery at the Reformed Church we attended and we don't want to do that to her again. Now that she is old enough to attend Sunday School we will likely start attending in person.
I was raised Catholic by my mother (my dad is not religious), including Catholic school, but consider myself now 100% godless heathen. H was raised Lutheran but is non-religious as well.
H and I occasionally go to a nearby Unitarian church, and have talked about possibly bringing LO there for the community aspect, but the services there feel kind of half-assed and we're on the fence. If there were a Quaker church near here I would consider that too, but there isn't one close enough for us to regularly participate. I don't want LO to grow up ignorant of religion and at the very least we would take her around to different types of churches once she's old enough for the education factor and so she knows what options are out there should she ever feel drawn to adopt a religion herself.
My mom may want LO to be baptized in the Catholic Church, and if she asks I will probably agree to it. I mean, if I don't even believe in it how can I say there is any harm?
ETA: I don't mean that I think Unitarianism generally is half-assed, just that the particular one close by seems to throw their services together rather last-minute in a half-assed kind of way. Not that I think all Unitarian churches are like that.
DH and I are both Christians, he grew up Pentecostal and I got saved at an AG, we attend a reformed-ish/non denom-ish and we will raise the girls that as well as it is a big part of our life.
Post by radtechgirl on Feb 15, 2015 17:53:30 GMT -5
DH and I were both brought up catholic. I have not been to church in awhile since I work every other weekend and am to lazy to go on the weekend I am off. He works at a catholic school. We plan on bringing our LO up as catholic and send him to catholic school.
My mom is Greek Orthodox, my Dad is Methodist. When I was in 1st grade, my parents sent me to Catholic School. None of us were baptized, my parents felt it was important we picked our religion when we were adults.
I went through a ton of soul searching as I got older. Going through IF, I was certainly mad at God and at some point, I didn't believe he existed.
When my ODS was born, I remember feeling so sad that I wouldn't be able to have a brother or sister for him. I remember being angry at God again and again, feeling that there was no way He existed. At some point, I began praying to God that I'd have a sibling for him.
When Alexander was just over 2 years old, I found out I was expecting, without treatments. We were told 1% chance of natural conception, 85% chance of miscarriage. Andrew was born in September 2011.
I had been looking as I was pregnant, for a church. And I kept getting drawn back to the Catholic Church. I wanted a sense of community, I wanted to have that connection with God. About 11 months after Andrew was born, DH and I contacted the Faith Formation at our local Catholic Parish. We both joined RCIA and I was baptized March 2012. My boys were baptized June 2012.
That's a long winded story of I'm Catholic.
DH is a cradle Catholic, and received his first Communion, but was never confirmed. He received that sacrament when I was baptized. We also had a Catholic wedding the week before my baptism/his confirmation.
I love the Catholic Church. I really feel at home there, I don't know how to explain that... I love all the Sacraments, and receiving the Eucharist every week. And I'm so very excited for Lent and Easter and to baptize this baby a few weeks after birth!
DS - Alexander, b. 10/22/08, our 'went to hell and back IVF Miracle' DS - Andrew, b. 9/15/11, our 'holy shit we have a bed baby' baby DD - Adrianna, b. 5/8/15, our 'lightening strikes twice' baby
I grew up in the Episcopal church, but for the last 8-9 years I have been attending an Anglican church. I enjoy the liturgical style of worship and participating in Holy Communion every Sunday. I will say that I do not hang my hat on the denomination of church I attend. I think declaring denominations sometimes causes divisions between Christians for very silly reasons. The most important thing for me is that Biblical truths are the final authority in all that happens at the church.
My family and I are very active in our church and head up our Blessing Others Initiative that feeds the homeless and provide for their basic needs. Sometimes, I think it is more of a blessing to us than the homeless receiving meals and a helping hand.
DD was baptized as an infant and our son will be as well. We will do our best to train up our children in the ways of Christ and when the time comes for them to make the decision for themselves, they too, will choose Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior, as shown in Proverbs 22:6. Confirmation will be one of the first steps they will take when making their choice. I will continuously pray that they choose Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior.
Through the lives we lead today, we try to lead by example and live for Christ on a daily basis. However, we are sinners and constantly fall short in thought, word, and deed. We recognize our personal need for a Savior and His mercies and grace on a daily basis. We feel blessed to serve a Lord and Savior who loves each and every one of us so much that He chose to die for us. His blood washes away our sins and He provides the way into Heaven. We simply have to choose to live for Him.
We also really stress loving one another and not judging others to our DD. As Christians, I think loving one another and not judging others is a point that is missed a lot and we tend to be viewed as the exact opposite. Basically, we want to teach our children to love others as Christ loves us.
As said in Joshua 24:15, "...But as for me and my household, we will serve the LORD."
DH and I both grew up going to and being active in church. Now we are both non-believers and don't attend. Both of our mothers are pretty religious. Not really sure how it's all going to pan out with the baby because I know they'll want him to be baptized but we'll see. Of course he will be free to practice or not practice whatever religion he chooses.
It's nice to see so many people are willing to let their children choose their own religious preferences when they get older. I think that is definitely a change from the past.
I have to say, I think everyone chooses their own religious preferences at a certain point, whether their parents "let them" or not. So I think the main difference now is not so much that parents will "let" their kids choose when they get older, it's more that parents are more likely to accept it if their children choose something different, and they are more likely to let them know this ahead of time so that their children don't feel judged or unloved for rejecting their parents' beliefs.
Post by seventythree on Feb 16, 2015 0:09:12 GMT -5
I am Ukrainian Greek Catholic. Both of my parents had very strong faith, so I was raised with religion as an important part of my life. I grew up in the church community, even the elementary school we attended was attached to/partly owned by the church! So I'd see a lot of the same kids/families on Sundays, at school, Ukrainian dance lessons which took place at the school on Saturdays, etc. I also attended a Roman Catholic high school. In my house, going to church on Sundays was not up for discussion. No, not even after we turned 18 (and I lived "at home" until 28, mostly to do with sick/dying parents but that is another story). I went through my rebellious teen years when I thought it was all crap (still had to go), and then after I lost my dad at 21 I found great comfort not only in the church community, but in the ritual of it all. I continued to go regularly until I moved away from my hometown. I still (somewhat less regularly) attend church here, but I am really struggling to find the same community I felt at home. I would chalk it up to having grown up at that parish, but I've also visited other churches in other cities where I felt WAY more warm fuzzies than I've ever found here.
DH, on the other hand, is baptized Roman Catholic and that's about as far as it goes. He currently identifies as agnostic. Frankly it was good enough for me that we could get married in the Catholic church. He knows that my religion and culture are an important part of my identity and that I want to pass both on to our children. So our kid(s) will be baptized, I will take them to church with me, and then when they are older I will let them decide what they want. I made my way "back" to the church on my own, so I'm comfortable with ACTUALLY cutting them loose of the obligation and letting them work things out on their own.
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