Haha, hmm.

[20thirteen]

Man, I try to get involved in other areas of this site and I just feel like I don't belong. LOL

Over in Working Moms, I see all these women talk about stuff they do with their husbands and I'm a little jealous.  I kind of wish things went a little differently, although, I'm SO GLAD to not be with BD.  I know that if BF and I dated before I had DD, that we would've ended because I never wanted kids.  I don't know. I'm in a weird mood today.  What is going on with everyone else?

[freezorburn]

I'm a reg in the Cloth Diaper forum, and it has been a bit weird when discussions turn to relationships. But, they all know what's going on with me and have been very supportive.

[20thirteen]

Maybe I just feel out of place because I'm so comfortable here. Haha I do have a boyfriend but I feel weird bringing him up in convos because they complain about things their husbands do and I'm grateful for the things my boyfriend does, but also, he's not around me 24/7 lol

[becwheat]

I felt weird in the beginning on other pages, but really we are the same. We will never totally know the other side unless it is experienced, but I definitely can appreciate the humor and advice added by others.

I have fun on Parenting and now TTC. Instead of talking about my DH (before I had one) I talked about my dad and my brother and how they stepped up to be male role models. Or how I did things all by myself like go to the fair, or see a movie... without a dude!

They actually appreciate hearing that sometimes. I mean they didn't get to enjoy the fun of dating with a kid or having every parenting decision be solely theirs... OR not dealing with ILS!!!

lol TL:DR - Sometimes it is nice to offer your story and get advice from others who may have a different family dynamic. It can be amusing and/or helpful.

[ontherock2012]

I feel ya. I pretty much always feel like the odd man out. I try to participate more since TB move, but there's a lot that I don't relate too.
Probably more I don't relate to than I do.

[20thirteen]

I just saw someone post that they are "single-parenting this week". It still grates my nerves when people say that. I am biting my tongue about it though. I'd rather keep this place more positive than risk things getting blown out of proportion.

[freezorburn]

I saw something similar, but it was for a longer period of time. And another forum member was bothered by it and said as much. This got me thinking, and I actually realized that, in my case, parenting isn't going to feel much different than it did before. Because STBXH has always had a crazy work and travel schedule. And I can now put behind me the frustration of unfulfilled expectations in what I hoped he would be, as a parenting partner. Really the big challenges I am foreseeing are coming up with a plan for what his role will be in DS's life, and getting him to stick to it, and dealing with my own emotional fallout of the way our marriage is crashing and burning.

[emmaswan]

I can't stand when people say they're "single parenting for the week". No you're not! Your SO is just away for a bit but your help is on the way!

I'm a regular on One and Done....love that board. No drama, smart women.

I do feel out of place a LOT IRL though. I'm the only truly sole parent I know, and I don't feel like people really get that I don't get breaks, or help, or nights out. And I hear people talk about their DHs and I get sad, because I miss having a FAMILY. It's been 18 months but I still grieve for that.

[20thirteen]

Yeah, that sanctimommy I used to be friends with would complain about her DH and flaunt how they went out all the time because they lived with her mom so they had a babysitter on hand all the time always. It was like "wow, how rough your life is..." She unfriended me from FB when I started a barrage of pro-vax posts, because they are anti-vax

[madelyndaphney]

I'm the only single mom in my childbirth class, so that's awesome. I'm basically a zoo animal. That's kind of why I never participated on TB, I felt like the odd man out on most boards because I don't have a SO and that's what a lot of the threads turn into. I will be a single mom when my LO is born in April, so I wanted to get involved on the Single Parenting boards for support/advice/etc, but obviously TB went to hell and I'm not a confident poster, haha.

[ontherock2012]

madelyndaphney I was the only single person in the childbirth class too. It was a full day thing and I lasted a couple of hours. I felt ridiculous watching videos of couples and was just uncomfortable being there.
Fortunately for me, I work in that same hospital so it's not like I needed a tour.

[20thirteen]

madelyndaphney, I was also the only single person at the childbirth class, but I went with my mom. It was totally awkward because I sometimes get mistaken for a teenager, and they all looked at me as though I was this 17yr old kid who got knocked up. I felt really out of place and my mom tried to keep me from getting upset. I cried on the way home though. And my mom bought me a cookie. Because my mom is awesome.

[becwheat]

Feb 19, 2015 14:09:12 GMT -5 emmaswan said:

I can't stand when people say they're "single parenting for the week". No you're not! Your SO is just away for a bit but your help is on the way!

I'm a regular on One and Done....love that board. No drama, smart women.

I do feel out of place a LOT IRL though. I'm the only truly sole parent I know, and I don't feel like people really get that I don't get breaks, or help, or nights out. And I hear people talk about their DHs and I get sad, because I miss having a FAMILY. It's been 18 months but I still grieve for that.

Girl you ARE a family!!

I miss my little family of 2 sometimes, though I am grateful for DH. Solo/Only parents have a hard road, but I know you are a strong and capable lady so you will find the fun in it

I will NEVER not flinch when people say they are a "single parent" for x amount of time. I only give Military wives a pass on this, though they have a loving partner somewhere and finical support... their struggles can be harder than a single mom sometimes emotionally. ANYWAY outside of a military wife.. taking on all the household/kid duties for any amount of time is not the same as doing that PLUS having no emotional or finical support. 

[madelyndaphney]

20thirteen, ontherock2012,I'm relieved someone else knows the insane akwardness that I do! My mom goes ewith m too, and she corrects the teacher the entire time, so the couples look at me with even more annoyance.

[20thirteen]

LOL, she *corrects* the teacher?? What is the teacher saying?

[ontherock2012]

Feb 20, 2015 10:03:12 GMT -5 20thirteen said:

madelyndaphney, I was also the only single person at the childbirth class, but I went with my mom. It was totally awkward because I sometimes get mistaken for a teenager, and they all looked at me as though I was this 17yr old kid who got knocked up. I felt really out of place and my mom tried to keep me from getting upset. I cried on the way home though. And my mom bought me a cookie. Because my mom is awesome.

Your mom is awesome.

[madelyndaphney]

20thirteen,Yes! Corrects! She was telling us about the importance of kegals, and my mom chimed in with how those are outdated and not everyone needs to do them, etc. And proceeded to e-mail the teacher some info about it. She pretty much contradicts everything the teacher says.

[20thirteen]

LOL, that's hilarious! (sorry to just respond now, busy weekend!)

My mom didn't correct the teacher, per se, but she would lean over to me and be like "well... for me..."

And that's weird that your teacher would be giving you outdated material! What else is she telling you?

[madelyndaphney]

20thirteen, I thought the majority of what she told us was spot on, right on the money with everything I've read. My mom is just against kegal exercises for some reason lol

[emmaswan]

Feb 20, 2015 10:56:02 GMT -5 becwheat said:

Feb 19, 2015 14:09:12 GMT -5 emmaswan said:

I can't stand when people say they're "single parenting for the week". No you're not! Your SO is just away for a bit but your help is on the way!

I'm a regular on One and Done....love that board. No drama, smart women.

I do feel out of place a LOT IRL though. I'm the only truly sole parent I know, and I don't feel like people really get that I don't get breaks, or help, or nights out. And I hear people talk about their DHs and I get sad, because I miss having a FAMILY. It's been 18 months but I still grieve for that.

Girl you ARE a family!!

I miss my little family of 2 sometimes, though I am grateful for DH. Solo/Only parents have a hard road, but I know you are a strong and capable lady so you will find the fun in it

I will NEVER not flinch when people say they are a "single parent" for x amount of time. I only give Military wives a pass on this, though they have a loving partner somewhere and finical support... their struggles can be harder than a single mom sometimes emotionally. ANYWAY outside of a military wife.. taking on all the household/kid duties for any amount of time is not the same as doing that PLUS having no emotional or finical support. 

Thank you for reminding me of this, becwheat. I sometimes forget that. I guess what I was meaning by that was that I miss the whole going out and doing things with XH and DD and having someone to marvel about how our little one is growing up, I miss having someone to sit on the couch with an veg out to TV with, things like that. I get to do that on my own but I feel isolated a lot. I don't have a real good social support system and it sucks. 

I do give military wives a pass...they may get financial support and their SO may be coming home at some point but they also have the stress of worrying about their SO's safety, plus the unpredictable schedules and having to move frequently, and other things that go with being a military family. 

[20thirteen]

Feb 23, 2015 11:30:18 GMT -5 emmaswan said:

Feb 20, 2015 10:56:02 GMT -5 becwheat said:

Girl you ARE a family!!

I miss my little family of 2 sometimes, though I am grateful for DH. Solo/Only parents have a hard road, but I know you are a strong and capable lady so you will find the fun in it

I will NEVER not flinch when people say they are a "single parent" for x amount of time. I only give Military wives a pass on this, though they have a loving partner somewhere and finical support... their struggles can be harder than a single mom sometimes emotionally. ANYWAY outside of a military wife.. taking on all the household/kid duties for any amount of time is not the same as doing that PLUS having no emotional or finical support. 

Thank you for reminding me of this, becwheat. I sometimes forget that. I guess what I was meaning by that was that I miss the whole going out and doing things with XH and DD and having someone to marvel about how our little one is growing up, I miss having someone to sit on the couch with an veg out to TV with, things like that. I get to do that on my own but I feel isolated a lot. I don't have a real good social support system and it sucks. 

I do give military wives a pass...they may get financial support and their SO may be coming home at some point but they also have the stress of worrying about their SO's safety, plus the unpredictable schedules and having to move frequently, and other things that go with being a military family. 

Can I move in with you?  We can sit on the couch and watch TV together and DD would have a pretend older sister and your DD can have a pretend younger sister.  And, if we last 7+ years, we can say we live in a platonic marriage. HAHA

[emmaswan]

Feb 23, 2015 12:31:51 GMT -5 20thirteen said:

Feb 23, 2015 11:30:18 GMT -5 emmaswan said:

Thank you for reminding me of this, becwheat. I sometimes forget that. I guess what I was meaning by that was that I miss the whole going out and doing things with XH and DD and having someone to marvel about how our little one is growing up, I miss having someone to sit on the couch with an veg out to TV with, things like that. I get to do that on my own but I feel isolated a lot. I don't have a real good social support system and it sucks. 

I do give military wives a pass...they may get financial support and their SO may be coming home at some point but they also have the stress of worrying about their SO's safety, plus the unpredictable schedules and having to move frequently, and other things that go with being a military family. 

Can I move in with you?  We can sit on the couch and watch TV together and DD would have a pretend older sister and your DD can have a pretend younger sister.  And, if we last 7+ years, we can say we live in a platonic marriage. HAHA

Only if you promise to cuddle with me! Haha.

[20thirteen]

CUDDLE PARTIES!!!

[saltypearl]

I feel you ladies when people talk about solo parenting. It really pisses me off. Poor you, for x number of days you are the responsible adult. Try every single day, every single hour and then you can bitch to me. Every once in a while I Debbie Downer them all and point it out. I try not to be a martyr but seriously, I would love someone to watch tv with, put one child or the other to bed etc etc.

[Deleted]

Im still posting on this thread because Im feeling it. I am SMBC, no X anybody, no child support and the killer? I work nights. So I take DS to school grab a couple hours shut eye and go! Every waking minute is parenting. It works, but sometimes I do want to choke the sh!t out folks who say they are "solo" for the weekend. Serious sleep deprived irate. So I just want to vent then go hang out with my coupled friends who are so so so wonderful. I hate myself just a little bit for wanting to punch them occasionally---cause they invite us to dinner, pinch hit if I have a tax appt say and dont really need a sitter...Seriously it takes a village. Im grateful theres some peeps who get it. Do you ever have the waking nightmare that you will become incapacitated and be the person whose child sits by himself. Ugh. I have that dream once in a while... which is why I am the only person I know who still has a landline. So if I fall off the ladder and the phone is in my pocket- LO will call 911 and get help. It was a happy moment when I realized he was old enough to do it!

[excited30]

Feb 23, 2015 11:30:18 GMT -5 emmaswan said:

Feb 20, 2015 10:56:02 GMT -5 becwheat said:

I miss that too... I've been missing that since dd was born, well before that even.  I kicked my husband out when pregnant, so during early pregnancy were when some of the last cuddles happened and that was over 3 years ago.  I miss having someone to chill with and watch a movie, to snuggle with, and just share our days... k, now I'd best not dwell on this too much or I'm going to cry.  Well, heck, I've been doing a lot of that lately so I guess it doesn't matter.

[20thirteen]

Aw, excited30, so many hugs

[excited30]

Thanks 20thirteen. I'm just grieving pretty hard right now.

[saltypearl]

Mar 1, 2015 3:39:54 GMT -5 @sherminator said:

Im still posting on this thread because Im feeling it. I am SMBC, no X anybody, no child support and the killer? I work nights. So I take DS to school grab a couple hours shut eye and go! Every waking minute is parenting. It works, but sometimes I do want to choke the sh!t out folks who say they are "solo" for the weekend. Serious sleep deprived irate. So I just want to vent then go hang out with my coupled friends who are so so so wonderful. I hate myself just a little bit for wanting to punch them occasionally---cause they invite us to dinner, pinch hit if I have a tax appt say and dont really need a sitter...Seriously it takes a village. Im grateful theres some peeps who get it. Do you ever have the waking nightmare that you will become incapacitated and be the person whose child sits by himself. Ugh. I have that dream once in a while... which is why I am the only person I know who still has a landline. So if I fall off the ladder and the phone is in my pocket- LO will call 911 and get help. It was a happy moment when I realized he was old enough to do it!

I do the same thing with the phone!