Question about timing

[hoosiermama76]

Until we meet with our RE next week, we are still trying on our own. I'm 41, and so there's that. Well, FF says I'm ovulating tomorrow (Saturday), but it's my birthday party, and DH works, so timing is terrible.

Here's my long-winded question:

If you could only have sex the day before ovulation or the day of, which one is the better day?

I got a peak fertility reading this morning. We are doing it today. Is Sunday still feasible? Or should today do it?

[Deleted]

Just because ff days you're likely to ovulate tomorrow doesn't mean you will. But if you look in the newbie blog there's a chart that gives percentages for each day. I suggest you read that.

[♪♫choppinbroccoli♫♪]

I'd do it today. Where's that bell curve chart??

[♪♫choppinbroccoli♫♪]

Is the Newbie Blog gone??

Edit - nevermind. Found it. 

[Rama]

Feb 3, 2017 18:05:54 GMT -5 hoosiermama76 said:

Until we meet with our RE next week, we are still trying on our own. I'm 41, and so there's that. Well, FF says I'm ovulating tomorrow (Saturday), but it's my birthday party, and DH works, so timing is terrible.

Here's my long-winded question:

If you could only have sex the day before ovulation or the day of, which one is the better day?

I got a peak fertility reading this morning. We are doing it today. Is Sunday still feasible? Or should today do it?

I think there's a chart in the Newbie Blog about this. If anyone can help a poor mobilite out, that'd be swell.

IMO, before is better. FF predicts that O is tomorrow and you have a peak fertility reading on your monitor, but how are you confirming ovulation? Are you temping? How are you sure it's happening tomorrow? Maybe you'll ovulate Sunday. Maybe it's a one-time faker fluke. It happens.

The way I think is this: if I'm gonna ovulate on Saturday and ovulation takes less than half an hour, when should I load up on sperm? If I have sex first thing in the am, maybe that'll catch it before it gets too low? Will I have sex after the egg has already exited my body? Having sex Friday in this case would make more sense for me.

Alternatively, maybe I ovulate late on Saturday. Then do I want to have "fresher" sperm in there on Saturday day, to catch it at night?

I'm rambling, I know. Stream-of-consciousness thinking is a bitch. But yeah, I'd do it early. Or, hell, maybe even both. Sunday, too. Unless there's a MFI aspect, there's no medical reason you can't/shouldn't. It'd just be up to you guys and what you feel up to.

So, tl;dr--
Earlier is better, to have a bunch of sperm waiting for possible ovulation, but do the sex when you want, mango.

[hoosiermama76]

Today it is. I didn't temp this month because after four months it was driving me bat shit crazy. But, historically, I have always ovulated the day after I get peak. I m so ready to give this thinking to my RE. My FW is giving me major anxiety. And, I'm the one with the DH that has extremely painful orgasms, and we have already done it yesterday.

[thechickencoop]

Feb 3, 2017 18:21:05 GMT -5 ♪♫choppinbroccoli♫♪ said:

Is the Newbie Blog gone??

Edit - nevermind. Found it. 

See, this is what I don't get about my first two IUIs, like both time I had my trigger shot, then IUI 24 to 36 hours after. I had already ovulated both times when they did the ultrasound at the IUI appointment. So, wouldn't that be less than ideal?

This time I was thisclose to ovulating at the time of the IUI so I figure that's better.

[thechickencoop]

Feb 3, 2017 18:38:03 GMT -5 hoosiermama76 said:

Today it is. I didn't temp this month because after four months it was driving me bat shit crazy. But, historically, I have always ovulated the day after I get peak. I m so ready to give this thinking to my RE. My FW is giving me major anxiety. And, I'm the one with the DH that has extremely painful orgasms, and we have already done it yesterday.

I was going to say, I'd do it today I remember your H has difficulty ejaculating so -1 would be better timing if you're only getting one shot.

Good luck!

[Rama]

Feb 3, 2017 18:38:03 GMT -5 hoosiermama76 said:

Today it is. I didn't temp this month because after four months it was driving me bat shit crazy. But, historically, I have always ovulated the day after I get peak. I m so ready to give this thinking to my RE. My FW is giving me major anxiety. And, I'm the one with the DH that has extremely painful orgasms, and we have already done it yesterday.

Ohhhhhh, right right right. Yes. I forgot about your husband's pain, sorry. Definitely tonight for the best shot.

I hope the RE is able to come up with a good plan for you guys, if you even need it. <3

[hoosiermama76]

Feb 3, 2017 18:40:41 GMT -5 thechickencoop said:

Feb 3, 2017 18:38:03 GMT -5 hoosiermama76 said:

Today it is. I didn't temp this month because after four months it was driving me bat shit crazy. But, historically, I have always ovulated the day after I get peak. I m so ready to give this thinking to my RE. My FW is giving me major anxiety. And, I'm the one with the DH that has extremely painful orgasms, and we have already done it yesterday.

I was going to say, I'd do it today I remember your H has difficulty ejaculating so -1 would be better timing if you're only getting one shot.

Good luck!

Thank you, ladies, for schooling this oldie newbie! LOL.

[obscurereference]

Personally I would be happier with sex the day before O.

That chart is interesting. Why would it be more likely when you have sex on -4 than -3? That makes no sense.

[hoosiermama76]

Feb 3, 2017 19:21:12 GMT -5 obscurereference said:

Personally I would be happier with sex the day before O.

That chart is interesting. Why would it be more likely when you have sex on -4 than -3? That makes no sense.

Agree. I don't understand the chart. Why would -2 be better than -1.
Well, we did the deed. -1 so we shall see.

[frecklesnbrains]

Sounds like you got good advice. I was just going to invite you to join us on TTC>35 if you'd like. We need the company of more a-hem "mature" ladies.

The theory is that sperm can hang out and survive for many days, but the egg dies quickly if it isn't fertilized, so giving the sperm a head start and time to make their way up to the Fallopian tubes is helpful. That's how I've always thought about it.

Good luck to you!

[robotpcr]

Feb 3, 2017 19:21:12 GMT -5 obscurereference said:

Personally I would be happier with sex the day before O.

That chart is interesting. Why would it be more likely when you have sex on -4 than -3? That makes no sense.

My guess would be that -4 and -3 are essentially the same and that -2 and -1 are also about the same.  They're close enough that the error bars probably overlap.

[teraiin]

Feb 3, 2017 20:51:18 GMT -5 robotpcr said:

Feb 3, 2017 19:21:12 GMT -5 obscurereference said:

Personally I would be happier with sex the day before O.

That chart is interesting. Why would it be more likely when you have sex on -4 than -3? That makes no sense.

My guess would be that -4 and -3 are essentially the same and that -2 and -1 are also about the same.  They're close enough that the error bars probably overlap.

That was always my thought on it. When you consider what time of day you have sex and what time of day you could potentially ovulate.

[hoosiermama76]

Feb 3, 2017 20:43:18 GMT -5 frecklesnbrains said:

Sounds like you got good advice. I was just going to invite you to join us on TTC>35 if you'd like. We need the company of more a-hem "mature" ladies.

The theory is that sperm can hang out and survive for many days, but the egg dies quickly if it isn't fertilized, so giving the sperm a head start and time to make their way up to the Fallopian tubes is helpful. That's how I've always thought about it.

Good luck to you!

frecklesnbrains I am on that group, but no one ever posts anything! I'll start checking in more.

Again, such great advice!!!! Thank you ladies!

[Ray]

Everything's been covered