RE appt question for us in AMA

[hoosiermama76]

I think I'm the oldest here (just turned 41). We had our consult today, and I'm one of those lucky people who have insurance coverage, but it's just for one doctor. He was likable enough, and he is number one in the state. However, even before he has our fertility results, he made the recommendation that we proceed to IVF. They also batch, so I'm not sure what people's experiences are with that. Because he is a one man show, there is little to no flexibility with scheduling of appointments: he claimed that all ultrasounds have to be in the mornings and that I'll need to take two days off for the retrieval and the transfer. This will be tough with my work so I was curious if that was the norm. He said he would transfer 2-3 embryos because the success rate for someone my age to have a live birth from IVF is 15%. The odds we conceive naturally are two percent. He gave the same odds for medicated cycles or IUI. My husband is disabled because of a spinal cord injury, and he didn't mention anything about this. My friend who is five days older than me and goes to another clinic (where I would have pay out of pocket), tried different things first, so I guess I'm a little hesitant to bring out the big guns so soon. On the other hand, I don't want to waste any more time, if that's the big factor. All in all, what is one's ideal RE like: optimistic, realistic, aggressive? Does anything feel off about this?

[Deleted]

I liked the two REs I saw, and they were on board with my plans, so I liked that. There was a lot of back and forth and I never felt pressured into anything (I didn't want to do medicated cycles, I was there for RPL). That being said, if you're unsure of the protocol I would absolutely get a second opinion even if it's a bit inconvenient. Going straight to IVF is expensive and not something I would do without being sure that was what I was on board with.

[madamewaffles]

I agree with ****** on all accounts. I think you should definitely allow your test results to come through before making any decisions. You could ask your RE for more customized rates for success after he has those in hand.

If you decide to go with IVF: As far as the scheduling goes, my clinic also only did AM ultrasounds and batched cycles. I had no hiccups with this and it all went seamlessly. I would agree you will probably want to take the days of retrieval and transfer off of work. Retrieval can be tiresome, especially since you would likely be given a twilight anesthesia for the procedure and will feel groggy for the rest of the day as well as experiencing abdominal bloating and discomfort. Doctor's orders on transfer day are usually to take it pretty easy as well, although studies have shown resuming normal activity the same day as a transfer results in higher success than laying down all day.

[thechickencoop]

I don't remember, have you had any testing yet? Has your H? Do you have an IF diagnosis? I would think he would go through the normal rigamarol no matter what your age; bloodword, SA (even though I know it will suck), HSG, etc.

I know you've answered that before so I'm sorry for asking again.

[thechickencoop]

Oh, as for the scheduling and whatnot, I don't know about my RE but I know that a lot of them batch cycles. Mine also only does ultrasounds from 7:30 to 8:30 am and bloodwork from 7 to 9 am. I think they have specific times for other appointments and whatnot as well but I haven't paid close attention.

[madamewaffles]

A big reason why they do ultrasounds and bloodwork in the morning is so that they can go over the results and call you back by the end of the day to give orders on what you should do next since cycles can be time sensitive.

[hoosiermama76]

Feb 7, 2017 21:21:07 GMT -5 @led said:

I liked the two REs I saw, and they were on board with my plans, so I liked that. There was a lot of back and forth and I never felt pressured into anything (I didn't want to do medicated cycles, I was there for RPL). That being said, if you're unsure of the protocol I would absolutely get a second opinion even if it's a bit inconvenient. Going straight to IVF is expensive and not something I would do without being sure that was what I was on board with.

True, @led. If I go this guy, I don't pay anything. Insurance covers it all.

[hoosiermama76]

No, I haven't had any testing done yet, and that is what is so weird about this whole scenario.

[hoosiermama76]

Wow! Ladies! Thanks for the info. I'm glad to know that this is somewhat familiar procedure. Honestly, I feel kind of alone in this even though I have friends going through the same thing and even though DH has been wonderful. So, it is good to touch base with people here. I feel like I'm always "on" at work teaching and acting as if nothing is bothering me. I have a therapist and take antidepressants, but infertility just sucks. You all make it suck less.

[♪♫choppinbroccoli♫♪]

I'm not quite judging your RE yet. I say give him a chance by expressing your hesitancy with shooting straight to IVF and see what he says. Nothing wrong with having some test results first.

I agree with him about taking off after the retrieval, for sure. That bloat is for REAL. My RE also had me take off day of and next day for the transfer. I'm on the fence about it, but whatevs. I did it.

Random thought: I think I have become a proponent of FETs only. If I could do it over again, I wouldn't have done a fresh transfer.

The good thing about IVF with regards to your husband is that he won't have to go through the pain every time like he would with timed intercourse or IUI. Just a thought.

[rooskie]

I'm also going to throw out that with your H's issues I would do a freeze with the SA so they have a sample available at the clinic. That way you have it after the test and he might have to produce less samples.

Also I am doing batches right now and it was helpful to get everything organized and know in advance when I would likely need to take off (within a few day range)

[hoosiermama76]

These are all excellent points I hadn't thought about. They are freezing his SA for IVF, assuming he has good results. If not, he gets on the vitamins, then does it.

[thechickencoop]

I would also add to just make sure you advocate for yourself. If my insurance covered IVF and there was ONLY one provider, you can bet your ass that's where I'd be going. This shit is expensive.

Do your homework. Be your own advocate. Don't move forward with anything you don't feel comfortable with and be sure to ask WHY. Get your test results back, see what the RE says from there.

Good luck.

[nerdykitten]

I also was told to take two days off for ER and FET so I think that is fairly normal. Everyone handles the day after E R differently so that probably plays a part in that recommendation. For my two days off for FET they didn't want me staying stationary persay, but they wanted me to be taking it easy.

[kensie5226]

Feb 8, 2017 11:43:15 GMT -5 thechickencoop said:

I would also add to just make sure you advocate for yourself. If my insurance covered IVF and there was ONLY one provider, you can bet your ass that's where I'd be going. This shit is expensive.

Do your homework. Be your own advocate. Don't move forward with anything you don't feel comfortable with and be sure to ask WHY. Get your test results back, see what the RE says from there.

Good luck.

This for sure.