First sleepover?

[fancynewbeesly]

I feel like I am in uncharted mom territory here. When was your kids first sleepover? Reese and her best friend have been bugging us for a sleepover since September. We told them they had to have a couple of play dates first--to see how they get along OUTSIDE of school. We have never been to her house, although we had met and became friends with her parents through the school and school events and at our house.


Is 5.5 too young? I remember as a kid sleeping over at friends houses at about 4 years old. But they were neighbors so if something went wrong parents could easily walk over. 

[Deleted]

My oldest is 9.5 and was only going to cousins for sleepovers until 8. The only one she has ever had at someone else's house was her BFF and they have had several play dates and are just around the corner.

If it were anyone else I would have been more comfortable hosting

[akafred]

DD had one at that age, when her friend turned 6. We attempted one at our house with her brother but he couldn't handle it (he is older). We haven't tried again but she doesn't really have a BFF anymore.

[brachysira]

I recall that I would invite friends from preschool over for a playdate at 4 and they would be too afraid to come without mom or their parents just would not allow it. And then at 8, my birthday party was a slumber party with the girls in my class, and it was insanity chaos. One of the kids was too scared to stay and we had to call her family at around 10 PM. The other kids had various other crises that required adult assistance. I would never recommend a slumber party at any age and probably no small overnights until 3rd grade. But very cool 6 year-olds might be okay, especially if you can run things just like regular bedtime but with a special snack and movie added and not allow then to stay up all night coming up with their own ideas.

[fancynewbeesly]

Reese is not a nervous nelly I am not sure if the other kid would last at our house--however I know that Reese would have NO problem sleeping over there.

[Deleted]

We had sleepovers with neighbor friends around 5 and school friends starting in first grade, so 6. I think it depends on the kid though. I had friends that couldn't handle it at those ages. Where as I was all, BYE MOM! We always had play dates first outside of school. It's a ways off for DD but I think if she's ready around 6 or so I'd be OK with it if it's a good friend and we know the parents pretty well.

[Tater]

My first sleep over was at 7.

DS hasn't had or been to a sleepover and he is 6. I don't think I'm ready for that.

[skategirl128]

We've had cousin sleepovers forever. My nephews love to sleep over! We have one or another every couple weekends. We've traded kids and it works out well.

Friend sleepovers we've done since 6. His good friend is our neighbor, so really low key and they've grown up together. This year at 8/9 we've branched out to some other kids. All of the friend sleepovers but the neighbor have been at my house.

[McBenny]

That's would be too young for us unless it was family and even then it's limited.

Go with your gut is what I say.

[seadragon2013]

I started doing sleepovers with my best friend at 4 years old, but we lived just a few houses down the street from each other and our families were good friends.

I wouldn't let DS sleep over at a school friend's house if I didn't know the parents and hadn't spent a significant amount of time at their house until he was much older. Like late elementary school age.

[regal]

I was five and our parents knew each other very well.

I've had three and four year old neighbours and close friends of my kids sleep over. They have always gone well.

[Deleted]

I'm in a unique situation as I work 3rd shift and until recently was a single parent. (now my SO lives with us) My Mom did DS's overnight care (at her house) since infant- and occasionally she cant or wont. SO as early as 2 1/2-3 DS would occasionally spend an overnight at a friends house- a thoroughly vetted friend of the family with kids. Therefore he's pretty comfortable sleeping in alternate locations. If I knew the parents, and was familiar with the environment and their living style (guns locked? dogs under control) I probably would not have a problem

ETA: He's now 6. The biggest issue now would be his finding a bathroom in time.. He is trained, but if he sleeps too late sometimes has a problem with waking himself in time. Hes a very hard sleeper. It was super easy when he was in a pull up overnight.

[thechickencoop]

I remember doing sleepovers all through elementary school when I was younger; it was definitely the norm from like....6 to 10 maybe?

I think at 5 I would have to be more familiar with the parents. Have you ever been over there for a play date? Have they been to your house?

DS slept over at a friend's house when he was 3 but they are almost like family so it wasn't just a random friend from daycare. He did fine. She ran bedtime for both like normal but instead of in bed, she made a big 'floor bed' for both of them to sleep together. It was kind of cute IMO.

[mrsbuttinski]

IME, sleepovers tend to be more of a 1st/2nd grade milestone and come after an established playdate routine unless it's a family friend/cousin situation.

Sometimes a child who is a younger sib in the family with instigate because they see it as something big kids do because their older sibs have them.

[Deleted]

DD had her first sleepover shortly after turning 6. The other girl was 5.5 and wasn't quite ready. She woke up a few times in the night, but I was able to get her to go back asleep.

DD had her first sleepover somewhere else right before she turned 7. She made it the whole time, but confided in me that she hadn't slept much because they left the TV on and she needs quiet, dark conditions to sleep. This was confirmed when she took a nap later that day for the first time in about 4 years. She had a lot of fun outside of that, though.