Making family/friends vaccinate before seeing baby?

[beebe918]

H and I are getting the Tdap vaccine. I very casually asked my mom if she would be willing to get it as she'll watch the baby when I go back to work, she flat out said no.

[snapdragon]

I would only do this for someone who would be living with us in the first 3 months for an extended period of time. Visitors just need hand sanitizer.

[radtechgirl]

I told my MIL that she needs to be up on her shots because she is afraid to go to the doctor and is morbidly obese.

[amylee545]

Feb 17, 2015 7:21:56 GMT -5 snapdragon said:

I would only do this for someone who would be living with us in the first 3 months for an extended period of time. Visitors just need hand sanitizer.

This exactly. I think otherwise it is complete overkill.

[mrsf0831]

I got mine last week ,ouch . dh got his in 2012 so he's good, how we're just asking the grandparents since mil will be watching the boys atleast twice a week and my mom prob will be around a lot.


Eta: . both my mom and mil work in a hospital as a cna and ma so id feel better w them getting the shot too

[hotcoconuts82]

I can't even get dh to get the dtap, let alone his mother...

[SassyPants150]

We asked our parents to do it since they were the ones who would be doing a lot of handling during newborn stage. DD was a January baby though so there was a whole lot of sick going around. None of them minded the extra precaution.

[orangepickle]

This feels pretty extreme - I wonder if that woman is going to ask for verification or just take people's word for it.

[IFinTN]

We asked my parents to get boosters for tdap and mmr. They already have flu shots. His mom is a nurse so she's already up on vax..not sure about his Dad as they live pretty far away and won't be around much anyway.

Eta: as for other visitors we won't ask.

[Deleted]

My parents and ILs & siblings have/are getting the dtap. Personally I don't see how you could ask people who might stop by once to see the baby to get a vaccine, plus how would you know they got it? I think hand washing is fine for the once in a while visitors.

[Deleted]

Feb 17, 2015 8:19:44 GMT -5 McBgg21 said:

Why did I think tdap has 2 p's?? I'm blaming sleep...

I can totally understand doing this in cases of a recent outbreak or flu season, or asking grandparents who will frequently handle the baby. That might not be a bad idea for us either really as MIL works with the public...

I was surprised on the facebook post how just about everyone found this to be totally reasonable (though I don't think most of the responders are mothers). I can't imagine asking friends or relatives who will only see the baby once or occasionally to take this precaution.

The ones who opposed probably kept their mouths shut!

[Deleted]

I talked with DH about tdap the other day and he will probably get it. Pretty sure neither sets of parents will get it though. They both live 16+ hours away from us and although they will be visiting when she is born, I trust them to wash their hands. My best friend had a baby in September and I spent tons of time over there...she didnt ask me to get tdap.

[littlecookie]

I don't think there's anything wrong with it. My pedi asks about grandparents having the vaccine. i think this really depends on how you take "family/friends", but I'd assume the family/friends that were being requested would be around the baby a lot.

[tabH]

We did the same as many PPs said, asked anyone who was going to be around for a long period of time to get their whooping cough vax. It was both of our mom's who were going to be around so it wasn't that big a deal. Anyone just stopping by used hand sanitizer.

[mrstwiddy]

Feb 17, 2015 7:32:53 GMT -5 radtechgirl said:

I told my MIL that she needs to be up on her shots because she is afraid to go to the doctor and is morbidly obese.

radtechgirl What does this have to do with anything? Just interested.


We actually did require all the grandparents (my daughter had EIGHT when she was born....) and my husband's brother and his wife (they live with the in laws and are around all the time) to get the flu shot and Tdap. We were completely insane and worried though, and our daughter was born in February at the height of flu season and RSV and all that.

I figure this kid is going to be around a toddler from day one. Yes, she's vaccinated but she's basically a walking germ so I have no idea how that's going to go. I'm definitely more laid back this time around than I was with my daughter, but I wouldn't judge anyone who asked people who were going to be around the baby often to get the shots.

[Starbuck128]

We asked the grandparents and my brother to get updated when DS was born. My family did, but I didn't hear back from the ILs. I just assumed since MIL is a school nurse and our area was in the middle of a whooping cough outbreak and you couldn't turn around without hearing a PSA about getting the shot if you spend time around kids that that meant they got them. I now know MIL gets her thrills by ignoring medical advice, and the more likely it puts her family in danger, the bigger her thrill. I'm going to get an answer this time who they won't see the baby.

[radtechgirl]

mrstwiddy [/quote]radtechgirl What does this have to do with anything? Just interested.

I mainly want her to go so she can get healthy, she says she does not go because she knows they are going to find something wrong. She is 56 years old and should have a mammogram and colonoscopy and many other preventive type visits. She is about 4 feet 9 inches and weighs close to 350 lbs. she complaints about joint pain and being short of breath.
You would think after losing your husband to prostrate cancer you would take better care of your self. Even more so since your oldest is having children.

[Deleted]

Feb 17, 2015 8:37:04 GMT -5 @gfj48 said:

Yeah I think this is a TETO situation. Especially if you don't know the back story...

MIL, FIL & BIL live in a tiny ass house and MIL does in-home daycare (for some dirty ass people). I don't trust any of these people to stay away from my kid if they're sick...So I'm protecting my kid how I see fit.

Gotta do what you gotta do. Kudos to you for taking a stand on your baby's health!

[smilz4782]

Before reading responses:
I think it's more important in the winter months when a baby is a newborn to make sure primary caregivers are protected from influenza and pertussis.
As for visitors, I would ask them to wash hands and don't come visit if any sign of illness.
But I won't be asking their flu/dtap status.
We were a lot more reclusive last winter when DD was a newborn. This year it'll be spring and I plan to get out more.

DH and I both re did our dtap boosters and had flu shots when I was pregnant with DD and have had flu shots this year... Since we are her primary caregivers

[mrstwiddy]

Feb 17, 2015 9:13:36 GMT -5 radtechgirl said:

mrstwiddy

radtechgirl What does this have to do with anything? Just interested.

I mainly want her to go so she can get healthy, she says she does not go because she knows they are going to find something wrong. She is 56 years old and should have a mammogram and colonoscopy and many other preventive type visits. She is about 4 feet 9 inches and weighs close to 350 lbs. she complaints about joint pain and being short of breath.
You would think after losing your husband to prostrate cancer you would take better care of your self. Even more so since your oldest is having children. [/quote]

Bless. I totally get that. My Mom isn't overweight but she smokes and doesn't take care of herself. We finally got her to go to ALL the doctors she needed to go to this year and it's been really stressful. My Dad IS very overweight, smokes, and is in terrible health overall. It's very frustrating to watch your parents basically kill themselves and not be able to do anything about it.

My husband and I are overweight and we have VOWED to get healthy after this baby gets here. I know it will be even harder to focus on with two kids rather than one, but we have to do it. I never want our kids to have to feel the stress of having unhealthy parents like I do.

[onceinlovewithamy]

My SIL made this rule when my nephew Hayes was born. The monster and I were up on our VAX, but I don't think the hubs was.

I have no intentions of asking people to vaccinate before coming to see the baby. I don't really feel like it's my place.

[pintobean]

No I won't be asking people that. My husband and I will be up to date on everything and of course my son is already. I can't keep the baby from ever getting things unless I put it in a bubble. I will do they typical, request you wash your hands, and no sick visitors.

[shmee]

Both of our parents volunteered to get the tdap and they all get the flu vaccine anyway, so it wasn't really an issue for us. They're the only ones who will spend an extended period of time with the newborn, so luckily I don't really have to think twice about it.

[veganontuesdays]

To be honest I didn't think about it until this thread... I just sent my mom an email asking what her thoughts on this are. My mom and dad will be the only ones besides my H and I that will spend a lot of time with LO. My inlaws live 2 hours away so their visits will not be as often. My parents got the flu shot right away when they found out I was pregnant so I am assuming they already have the tdap on their radar. They gooood like that. 

ETA: My mom already emailed me back and said that her and my dad took care of it awhile ago. Cute.  

[cbrandt1]

My sister required the tdap for all visitors. I wasn't a fan, but I wanted to see my neice. She could have done it in a much nicer way though, she literally made us prove it...I took a pic of the needle in my arm...

That being said, DH and I live far from all family and have asked to not have visitors until after 2 months. This has nothing to do with sickness and vaccine, but more us developing a schedule and routine we are comfortable with before we have extended stay guests.

[sarahbmcd]

I just had my tdap (arm still hurting since friday) and dh will be getting his. I believe my parents and bro will be getting theirs only bc they will be spending a lot of time with her. I would never dream of asking others to get it though.

[snapdragon]

I think it also depends on how reasonable is it to ask. My sister is the only relative I have in town and will spend the most time around the new baby, probably. I'd likely ask her to do it but she's got a ridiculous needle phobia, like, they've had to sedate her. So I'm not going to do that.

I might if we lived in CA. In fact, SIL lives in LA and is coming out to stay with us for a week right away, so I think I will ask her to make sure she's up to date.

[Ee]

H and I will be getting the tdap, and we're going to ask MIL to get it too since she will be with the baby a lot I'm sure.

For everyone else, hand washing is enough for me. Especially for a spring baby.

[CTri17]

Hand washing/Hand sanitizer is enough for me so long as the person visiting isn't coughing/sneezing/sick. So we won't be asking people to.

[scattered]

This isn't new. I did this over five years ago when Jack was born. He was a late term preemie, so I was not messing around. I asked my mom to get the T-Dap. He was born during the H1N1 crazy pandemic so I was very cautious.

After the winter we have had, I feel like asking this of our families again. We are 100% not allowing SIL and her entire unvaccinated family around the baby until she's older.