Job offer - help me think through this?

[traveltheworld]

As I've alluded to in the past, I applied for a in-house job (I currently work in Big Law) in a city that's 3 hours away, and got an offer earlier this week. I was going to take it, but then had my associate review today and got a raise and a bonus, so now I don't know what to do.

Positives of the new job:

• it is my dream job in terms of the type of work I'd do; there are very few companies in the country that would offer this type of work at this level.  
  
• minimum pay increase of about 20%, but could be up to an increase of 45% depending on company performance and my own performance. Once the long term incentive plan kicks in (in 4 years), that's another 35 - 50% bump.  It's pretty much unheard of to go from Big Law to in-house and make more money, so on a relative scale, it's a pretty sweet gig.
• I feel stuck at my firm - I'm now a 10th year associate with no real hope of making partner in the next several years.  Even if I do make partner, I'd have to continually generate business - not something I like to do or am particularly good at.  Without making partner, I'm pretty much near the cap in terms of pay.

Negatives of the new job:

• we have to move.  DH would need to find a new job.  I'm the main breadwinner in the household, but his salary is not insignificant - i.e. my pay increase wouldn't cover the lost of his job.
• we don't really know anyone in the new city.
• I do have great job security at my firm - I got told at my review today that even though I missed billable target by 30% (we had a really bad year in my practice group), they are still giving me a raise and a bonus because they like me and want me to feel valued.  But did get told that I'd have to have my own book of business if I want to make partner, but if I don't, they are fine with keeping me as an associate forever?

I think when it comes down to it, if I had a crystal ball and can know that DH will find a job, I'd move.  But we just don't know that.  DH is in an industry where the market is really bad right now and we've had friends who've been looking for a job for over a year with no luck.  DH is confident that he'll be fine and keeps telling me to take him out of the equation in terms of decision making, but I just can't.

Any thoughts?

[Widget123]

I think you should move and just hope the rest falls in place. I know what it feels like to be stuck in your current job and i think you might regret it if you dont take it. Without knowing more specifics on the new city and your H's industry, thats what id say.

[mustardseed2007]

Being in house is amazing. Being in house with a pay increase is even more amazing. How is the job security?

Do you like the location where you'd move to? Would you be leaving family behind or moving to family?

Could you save on some stuff while your DH is not working by stuff he'd do at home, child care saving etc?

I'm an in house lawyer and the main breadwinner in my family also. If DH left his job, there are a lot of positives that would come with that, so I wouldn't necessarily see my H as being unemployed as a total negative, so that's skewing my questions here.
Don't get me wrong, I like him working for that extra security, but it's another layer.

[akafred]

Dude. Move. I get being scared but that's all that is holding you back. Move.

[mommyatty]

In house is not necessarily awesome. And frankly in house practice is VERY different from practicing in a firm. The biggest difference is that to be successful, you really have to learn to take off your lawyer hat and put on your business partner hat. Plus, unless you plan to be a GC some day, there's no big increase opportunity unless you're willing to stop being the lawyer and move into a business role.

There is a lot to like about being in house. I love the business partner part. I love really knowing my clients and helping to shape what they are doing before there's a shit storm.

Have you considered an of counsel role? As I'm searching whether to go to a firm, an of counsel position is very intriguing to me. From what I'm hearing, at many firms, of counsel is treated and paid exactly like a non-equity partner but doesn't have the stress of business development.

If you're ready for a big change, though, go for it. DH is staying home right now by our choice, and it's awesome. And there is something to be said for leaving your comfort zone.

[helenahhandbasket]

What kind of area would you be moving to? Is it similar to the area you live in now (resources, schools, diversity, security)?

If it's the same or better, I'd heavily consider moving.

[rach]

COL difference? Can you save the difference with child care and outsourcing if your H stays home temporarily?

I'm inclined to say take it!

[traveltheworld]

mommyatty , I have thought about a of counsel role at my firm - I just don't know if they'll let me. I kind of broached the subject at my latest review, but they brushed it off and said they want me to concentrate on partnership, because that's where they see me. And I practice M&A and corporate securities - it's not one of those areas that lends itself naturally to being of counsel. I actually would LOVE to move out of the legal role and into something more business-like. I enjoy providing strategic advice (not necessarily legal advice) to my clients and love learning about their business - I always prided myself for being not just a good legal advisor, but a good business advisor.

helenahhandbasket ,and rach ,the area we'd be moving to is almost identical to where we live now in terms of COL, schools, etc. DH refuses to be a SAHD. He is a fantastic Dad, but not cut out to be a SAHD. I just don't want us to move, him not find a job for a long time, and be miserable. But I guess that's the risk we'd have to take. DH is totally enthusiastic about it, but DH is always almost unrealistically supportive of everything that I do or I want to do...

[sdlaura]

I probably wouldn't move, given the pros and cons you described. But then I'm pretty risk-averse. It sounds like you generally like your job and location now, and making that big of a move would require me to hate something about my current situation or see something super amazing about the new one.

[mommyatty]

traveltheworld - you sound born for an in house position. Take it. The loss of the strategy part of my job is the biggest reason I balk at going to a firm. I love that stuff.

[indyrowergirl]

Another vote to take it. Listen to your gut. There are reasons you went looking for a new job in the first place. Don't let fear of change get in your way.

[somebabiesmom]

I am not risk-averse, so I say take it. I also can easily remove YH from the equation, which leads me to conclude - again - take it.

[mustardseed2007]

Mar 11, 2017 23:28:05 GMT -5 traveltheworld said:

helenahhandbasket ,and rach ,the area we'd be moving to is almost identical to where we live now in terms of COL, schools, etc. DH refuses to be a SAHD. He is a fantastic Dad, but not cut out to be a SAHD. I just don't want us to move, him not find a job for a long time, and be miserable. But I guess that's the risk we'd have to take. DH is totally enthusiastic about it, but DH is always almost unrealistically supportive of everything that I do or I want to do...

can I just say, that is so sweet. Even if it doesn't help you decide. LOL. 

[ss265]

It sounds like a dream opportunity that you will be a good fit for so I'm inclined to say that you should take it. My key concern is that you will be operating on less income while your husband is job hunting. I would look at your finances and see how long you can afford for him to look for a job. And I agree that it's sweet of him to be supportive of you, no matter what.

[2chatter]

That's a tough situation. I am super risk averse and we won't move because our families are here and now the kids are getting too big to consider it. What are you leaving or gaining with a move? I would need the move to be a positive in some way - friends, family, something on the upside. Any chance DH could work remotely?

[sandandsea]

I would probably move after having a heart to heart with myself. Do I want to work forever and always be the main breadwinner or so I want to scale back at some point? Do I have the time to make new friends and create a village in the new city? If dh were the one with the opportunity would I be encouraging him to move and go for it? Can dh find a job (or even different career path) or can we cut back financially until he does? Do the kids have to move schools?