We're all great moms

[tiffbot]

I love this!! Its easy to see how awesome some other people are doing, and then you forget to pat yourself on the back sometimes watching everyone else.

I give myself a pat on the back every time we get through winter. And not just the first day of spring, actual end of winter haha. Months of snow, extreme windchill, travel, indoor play, outdoor play, endless winter gear and travel gear. And as you know I live small town rural with minimal amenities, so doing most of it from home but will get them to the city sometimes for some different activities, so the prep for that in the winter is just so much more than jumping in the vehicle and driving an hour each way. It's maybe a little crazy some days, but I make it work for all of us so I'm glad. It was super helpful getting DS in preschool and gymnastics this winter and having more places to let him go and learn.

I think I'd be a better mom if I could let go more often and spend more alone time with H. I still get stressed about leaving them alone with someone too long, and they have only ever been babysat by family, and I don't ask often. I think I get out for girls things often enough as it feels completely natural to leave them with H, but I wish I could let go more often so H and I could have more alone time too. We just don't prioritize it.

[jillywilly]

This is an excellent idea!

H and I actually heartily patted ourselves on the back for getting through a massive tantrum over the weekend. DS didn't touch his food for lunch, only wanted to stand in front of the pantry and ask for treats. So we offered him a bowl of Cheerios (our go-to "alternative" if he doesn't eat what he's offered), and he refused those. Since it was getting to be nap time, we took him, and the Cheerios upstairs and told him this is what he could eat, or he could nap without eating. We got through probably 10 minutes (but felt like 10 hours) of the worst tantrum he's ever had. But we stuck to our guns, didn't cater to him, and he wound up eating the Cheerios and taking a killer nap.

What I need to work on? Patience also. Whenever he gets whiny or clingy, or just difficult, I find that I need to remind myself that he's still ONLY a year old (almost two, but still - super little). He's acting like such a big boy in so many ways, it's hard for me sometimes to still have the patience I need to with him. In one of my not-finer parenting moments, I may have asked him "what is your problem???" in not the nicest tone on Friday His problem is he's a toddler.

[tiffbot]

Mar 21, 2017 14:43:22 GMT -5 carrots said:

Lately I feel like the only thing I have the capacity to do well is managing the logistics..

Trust me, that is not an "only" thing. It definitely takes times and you constantly have to adjust it as they get older and grow into new phases. You are doing great!

[sugarkissed]

I so need this today, it's been a rough stretch and I'm not feeling like the greatest mom. That said, I'm proud of myself for getting through 5 months of solo parenting and maintaining my sanity. All winter, all day every day, it was only me and we managed.

I could definitely work on my patience as well. I need to remember that I'm raising a 1 and 3 year old and that they are still just little people.

[tjanca22]

I surprise myself some days with how I'm handling 2U2 and can even knock a few things off the to do list. Days and weeks are downright crazy, but we've been at this for almost 4 months now. H has been working tons of shifts, today he's finishing up a 36 and starts a 72 next week. I sometimes feel like I'm just doing this by myself, but I'm doing it!

I'm also going to say I'm pretty proud that when E has a seizure I'm able to think logically, stay calm and do what's best for him. I'm sure that's just a mother's instinct, but it scares the hell out of me every damn time. In a few weeks it will be 1 year since he had his first one and I still remember that day like it was yesterday. It's crazy that this has become part of our lives for almost a year now.

I need to work on finding time alone for each child. It's always the three of us doing things and I can tell E is getting more and more jealous. I know he wants the 1:1 time with me and he deserves that. Lincoln too, but needs me in other ways that I can still fulfill at the moment.

[tjanca22]

Mar 22, 2017 12:00:31 GMT -5 budders said:

tjanca22 I'm also impressed with how well you handle the seizures, and all of the moms who have kids with big medical or developmental issues. Some of it is instinct, but it takes a lot of strength to stay calm and in charge during those moments and to keep your child feeling safe and calm.

You have no idea how much this means, thank you!

[baytosa2013]

Most days I feel like I'm doing a pretty good job with working from home with Charlotte here and getting things done while paying attention to her as well. I try really hard not to give too much screen time as a babysitter. Working from home with a toddler is no joke.

I definitely need more patience especially during middle of the night wake ups and tantrums. I've never been a patient person and I've had some awful parenting moments that I feel so guilty about. Sometimes they outweigh the good stuff in the back of my mind.

[tjanca22]

Mar 23, 2017 7:02:07 GMT -5 Joolschweets said:

tjanca22 yes, totally agree here. I've always been in awe of how you've advocated for E through his seizures and the tests. Such a scary thing that you've managed to navigate so well.

Thank you, this means a lot!

[periwinkledaydreams]

I am in love with this thread! Thanks @jemomma, and everyone because yall are truly a bunch of kick ass humans raising a bunch of kick ass humans!

I know I rock at meeting her where she's at. Reading her moods and adjusting our interactions accordingly, giving extra love when she needs it, space when she needs it, firmness when she needs it. There's a lot of joy and laughter and conversation in our home and I adore that. I'm so happy and proud that her and I just get along so well, and though we are SO similar that sometimes she can truly get under my skin, I love that I feel like I just GET her.

Back to the "we are so similar"... we are. And you know how that one friend who you just absolutely adore can do some crap that just drives you straight nuts? Yea, thats us. I catch myself losing my patience with her in certain moments where I stop and like.. yea, she's behaving just like me. I can forsee us butting heads over things as we grow, and I have to grow in and practice patience for sure.

[Bluedaisy]

Thank you for starting this @jemomma,! You guys are all great moms and I'm so proud to call you friends.