Engaged May 2003 Married June 2005 TTC #1 since October 2014 H-1% morph, low motility, low count Me-.1 AMH levels, low AFC, DOR/POI, perimenopause Foster Care journey begins March 2016-licensed 11/7/16 Foster parents to A & J 1/31/17 www.fertilityfriend.com/home/5525ef
Bio parents are not being honest with what our FD is being fed. This causes her to be in pain, bloated, gassy, and sometimes blowouts. We think the food is now a true allergy instead of just a skin allergy (gets a rash when eating too much of it) but the social workers flat out told us that bio parents need to make the doctor and therapy appointments-not us.
Which means our hands are tied currently. And we can't get her tested to show the social workers what bio parents are doing.
Engaged May 2003 Married June 2005 TTC #1 since October 2014 H-1% morph, low motility, low count Me-.1 AMH levels, low AFC, DOR/POI, perimenopause Foster Care journey begins March 2016-licensed 11/7/16 Foster parents to A & J 1/31/17 www.fertilityfriend.com/home/5525ef
Post by scoutradley on Apr 3, 2017 10:08:31 GMT -5
Oh crap. That sucks. Poor little girl. That's really unfair to her and rough on you unnecessarily. If you're having to foster her, why should bio parents be in charge of proper medical care? Clearly they aren't doing their job or she wouldn't be in foster care in the first place. Also sorry if I come off harshly, I have strong feelings about lousy bio parents.
Post by ohinvrtedworld on Apr 3, 2017 10:22:37 GMT -5
I don't know much at all about foster care, butlerfan, but I find it SO weird and beyond frustrating that parents who clearly were deemed unfit for the time being to have their children in their own care would be trusted to make doctor's appointments and feed them whatever when you've seen the consequences. Ugh. I can't believe your concerns aren't being heard on this.
We are finding more and more out from the in home worker (who's contract is up now....) that if we had different social workers working this case-it would be completely different. They want to be the parents friend. Which is causing all these issues. We have a team meeting on April 11th with social workers, us, and bio parents. If these items are not being brought up by the social workers at that point....I will be addressing it at that point and pushing to get her tested.
These kids will be reunified way to soon with the parents and I know for future cases to find out social workers before accepting....I don't want to work with these two in the future if I can avoid it.
Engaged May 2003 Married June 2005 TTC #1 since October 2014 H-1% morph, low motility, low count Me-.1 AMH levels, low AFC, DOR/POI, perimenopause Foster Care journey begins March 2016-licensed 11/7/16 Foster parents to A & J 1/31/17 www.fertilityfriend.com/home/5525ef
Post by ohinvrtedworld on Apr 3, 2017 10:38:27 GMT -5
Ugh I am dead tired today. On Saturday night, most of us bridesmaids stayed in a hotel to get ready together Sunday morning for the wedding. Well, one of them snored SO LOUD and the entire time. I got maybe 2 hours of sleep before waking up to get hotel breakfast and start getting ready. It was a long but fun day.
I was the only one short enough to walk down the aisle with the groom's 13 year old brother, he was still taller than me 😂
We are finding more and more out from the in home worker (who's contract is up now....) that if we had different social workers working this case-it would be completely different. They want to be the parents friend. Which is causing all these issues. We have a team meeting on April 11th with social workers, us, and bio parents. If these items are not being brought up by the social workers at that point....I will be addressing it at that point and pushing to get her tested.
These kids will be reunified way to soon with the parents and I know for future cases to find out social workers before accepting....I don't want to work with these two in the future if I can avoid it.
This sounds incredibly frustrating. I hope for your sake (and your FD) that the social workers get it together and focus their attention on what is best for her.
Post by leekpartyof2 on Apr 3, 2017 10:57:17 GMT -5
butlerfan, this whole process sounds so frustrating. FX that things get worked out (as much as possible) soon. I have absolutely no idea how the foster system works, but you and your H are awesome for stepping up and trying to improve life for the littles whose parents aren't able to.
We are finding more and more out from the in home worker (who's contract is up now....) that if we had different social workers working this case-it would be completely different. They want to be the parents friend. Which is causing all these issues. We have a team meeting on April 11th with social workers, us, and bio parents. If these items are not being brought up by the social workers at that point....I will be addressing it at that point and pushing to get her tested.
These kids will be reunified way to soon with the parents and I know for future cases to find out social workers before accepting....I don't want to work with these two in the future if I can avoid it.
Ugh I so hope that they either change their approach or get new social workers. Of course the goal is reunification, but too soon and they will end up in foster care again (which I know you've said has happened already). So not fair to you guys or the kids.
Post by scoutradley on Apr 3, 2017 11:38:59 GMT -5
butlerfan how frustrating. Being friends with parents who have had their child placed in foster care is not their job. I'm so sorry you (and FD) have to deal with that. The child deserves to have their best interest be first and foremost, no matter whose feelings may be hurt. If a social worker can't do that, they are not doing their job.
Today is boring over here. Just back to work and normal everyday stuff. The last two weekends have be GO, GO, GO. It was a mash up of fun, tiring, and taxing. I'm glad this weekend is a quiet one with no big plans or people to entertain. I already can't wait. But it's only Monday, boo!
TTC #1 starting July 2013, RE last 2014 First Angel baby lost July 11, 2014 IUI #1 with injections successful: EDD 11/24/15 Rainbow baby DD born 11/14/15 TTC#2 October 2016 Second Angel baby lost Jan 5, 2017
TTC #1 starting July 2013, RE last 2014 First Angel baby lost July 11, 2014 IUI #1 with injections successful: EDD 11/24/15 Rainbow baby DD born 11/14/15 TTC#2 October 2016 Second Angel baby lost Jan 5, 2017
Post by mflowers929 on Apr 3, 2017 14:31:50 GMT -5
I'm back to work today. I'm tired, I'm still not feeling 100%, and I'm just super grumpy (like snapping at a 99 y/o grumpy v.v). I haven't eaten a full meal all day because if I eat too much my stomach starts hurting, so that's probably not helping anything. I can't wait to get the next 2 1/2 hours done so I can go home and crawl in to my bed.
I had to take my dog to the vet this afternoon. He had a genetic disease in his eye that needed to be fixed with surgery a few years ago. This weekend I noticed he had a bump on the cornea of his bad eye. The good news is that my new kitten didn't scratch the dog in his eye. The bad news is that the vet has no idea what it is and told me to take him back to the optometrist. So that's pretty much how my Monday is going.
butlerfan, I'm sorry the social workers don't seem to be putting the kids first. You and your H are amazing for fighting for what is best for these kids.
Post by mflowers929 on Apr 3, 2017 17:39:49 GMT -5
Finally home so I can post more than nonsense!! butlerfan, that sounds like a really sucky system they have going. I'm sorry that you're having to deal with that. Hopefully some resolution can come soon
scoutradley, thanks sweetie. The last 2 hours dragged TBH. I just folded some laundry and spaced out mostly lol
Okay, so I'm kind of freaking myself out a little guys. Tell me if you think this is nuts. I think I mentioned here a little bit ago (a week or so) that I had had a night of strange dreams. One of the dreams included me getting some money in a check form. I checked my mailbox on the way in, and there was a check that had been mailed to me, for an unclaimed insurance refund. Am I wrong for freaking a little about this lol
Today I went on an online shopping spree (Easter pajamas, 6 'twirly' dresses, Easter basket fillers), basically ate my weight in leftover cakeballs from DD1's birthday party this weekend, and checked 7 things off my to-do list for the week. I mean the first two could be seen as bad, but I'm calling it a pretty damn good day. Lol.
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